Child support VS Custody confusion.

[Blondee365]

I am writing for Florida.
I have two children with my ex boyfriend, ages 4 and 7. We recently broke up in January of 2018. Prior to recently, we had a verbal agreement on child care and were able to work things out amongst each other. However, due to increased difficulty, I decided to file for child support. It is to my understanding that thru child support, we would develop a parenting plan, as well. My ex, however, does not want to pay child support and so, soon after receiving notice, went to court to fille for petition of paternity and parenting plan (50/50). We are both working however lawyers are costly so we are both pro we, and representing ourselves. This is all very new to me. He filed his petition, I filed an answer to his petition and counter petitioned with a more reasonable parenting plan. I want joint custody with myself being the physical custodian. Him having them one day of the week and on weekends. Him also paying child support.

Since my counter petition was filed, he’s filed for a motion for default (which I’m sure won’t be granted because I filed all my paperwork). I feel like the next step would be to file a motion for hearing; however because I am already working thru child support, he should be the one to file these motions (he was determined indignant status and I’m not) so I can avoid these unnecessary court fees etc. Am I going about this all wrong? Looking for clarity.

 

[Zigner]

I am writing for Florida.
I have two children with my ex boyfriend, ages 4 and 7. We recently broke up in January of 2018. Prior to recently, we had a verbal agreement on child care and were able to work things out amongst each other. However, due to increased difficulty, I decided to file for child support. It is to my understanding that thru child support, we would develop a parenting plan, as well. My ex, however, does not want to pay child support and so, soon after receiving notice, went to court to fille for petition of paternity and parenting plan (50/50). We are both working however lawyers are costly so we are both pro we, and representing ourselves. This is all very new to me. He filed his petition, I filed an answer to his petition and counter petitioned with a more reasonable parenting plan. I want joint custody with myself being the physical custodian. Him having them one day of the week and on weekends. Him also paying child support.

Since my counter petition was filed, he’s filed for a motion for default (which I’m sure won’t be granted because I filed all my paperwork). I feel like the next step would be to file a motion for hearing; however because I am already working thru child support, he should be the one to file these motions (he was determined indignant status and I’m not) so I can avoid these unnecessary court fees etc. Am I going about this all wrong? Looking for clarity.

You need an attorney.

 

[Blondee365]

You need an attorney.

I know that this is the best option. But spending thousands just isn’t feasible for me at this time.

 

[Just Blue]

I am writing for Florida.
I have two children with my ex boyfriend, ages 4 and 7. We recently broke up in January of 2018. Prior to recently, we had a verbal agreement on child care and were able to work things out amongst each other. However, due to increased difficulty, I decided to file for child support. It is to my understanding that thru child support, we would develop a parenting plan, as well. My ex, however, does not want to pay child support and so, soon after receiving notice, went to court to fille for petition of paternity and parenting plan (50/50). We are both working however lawyers are costly so we are both pro we, and representing ourselves. This is all very new to me. He filed his petition, I filed an answer to his petition and counter petitioned with a more reasonable parenting plan. I want joint custody with myself being the physical custodian. Him having them one day of the week and on weekends. Him also paying child support.

Since my counter petition was filed, he’s filed for a motion for default (which I’m sure won’t be granted because I filed all my paperwork). I feel like the next step would be to file a motion for hearing; however because I am already working thru child support, he should be the one to file these motions (he was determined indignant status and I’m not) so I can avoid these unnecessary court fees etc. Am I going about this all wrong? Looking for clarity.

Why isn't it in the childrens best interest to spend equal time with both parents?

 

[Zigner]

I know that this is the best option. But spending thousands just isn’t feasible for me at this time.

The adage penny wise & pound foolish comes to mind...

 

[Blondee365]

Why isn't it in the childrens best interest to spend equal time with both parents?

I am opting for this agreement because father has a history of bringing 7yo late to school and keeping her home from school for minor things. For example, the anniversary of his fathers passing away. He’s been so negligent that in 2018, CPS was called because our two year old was found wandering in the street by strangers. Also, my ex lives in a small one bedroom apartment with his girlfriend and brother. Therefore the children don’t have a room of their own. The father also has a long history of drug abuse with pills, cocaine, and marijuana. He claims He’s clean from the cocaine and pills now but is still using marijuana and even selling “pot brownies” and other edibles out of his home. Just don’t feel like this is the best place for them to be 50% of the time

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

I am opting for this agreement because father has a history of bringing 7yo late to school and keeping her home from school for minor things. For example, the anniversary of his fathers passing away. He’s been so negligent that in 2018, CPS was called because our two year old was found wandering in the street by strangers. Also, my ex lives in a small one bedroom apartment with his girlfriend and brother. Therefore the children don’t have a room of their own. The father also has a long history of drug abuse with pills, cocaine, and marijuana. He claims He’s clean from the cocaine and pills now but is still using marijuana and even selling “pot brownies” and other edibles out of his home. Just don’t feel like this is the best place for them to be 50% of the time

It doesn't sound like a good place for them to be any time at all.

 

[Blondee365]

The adage penny wise & pound foolish comes to mind...

Well as foolish as I may be, I did have a consultation with a lawyer who informed me of the steps to take to counterpetition and informed me as well that if he was pro se, then it would make sense for me to be as well.

 

[Zigner]

Well as foolish as I may be, I did have a consultation with a lawyer who informed me of the steps to take to counterpetition and informed me as well that if he was pro se, then it would make sense for me to be as well.

The attorney was obviously wrong. Go talk to that attorney again.

 

[Zigner]

I am opting for this agreement because father has a history of bringing 7yo late to school and keeping her home from school for minor things. For example, the anniversary of his fathers passing away. He’s been so negligent that in 2018, CPS was called because our two year old was found wandering in the street by strangers. Also, my ex lives in a small one bedroom apartment with his girlfriend and brother. Therefore the children don’t have a room of their own. The father also has a long history of drug abuse with pills, cocaine, and marijuana. He claims He’s clean from the cocaine and pills now but is still using marijuana and even selling “pot brownies” and other edibles out of his home. Just don’t feel like this is the best place for them to be 50% of the time

But it's ok 43% of the time?

Based on what you have said above, you REALLY need an attorney. This is NOT something you want to mess up. REALLY.

 

[Just Blue]

I am opting for this agreement because father has a history of bringing 7yo late to school and keeping her home from school for minor things. For example, the anniversary of his fathers passing away. He’s been so negligent that in 2018, CPS was called because our two year old was found wandering in the street by strangers. Also, my ex lives in a small one bedroom apartment with his girlfriend and brother. Therefore the children don’t have a room of their own. The father also has a long history of drug abuse with pills, cocaine, and marijuana. He claims He’s clean from the cocaine and pills now but is still using marijuana and even selling “pot brownies” and other edibles out of his home. Just don’t feel like this is the best place for them to be 50% of the time

But it's okay for them to be there on the weekends? How long did Dad have a drug history? Were you together while he was on drugs? What was the result of the CPS investigation?

 

[Zigner]

But it's okay for them to be there on the weekends? How long did Dad have a drug history? Were you together while he was on drugs? What was the result of the CPS investigation?

1 day a week and weekends. In other words, 3 out of 7 (as opposed to 3.5 out of 7)

 

[Just Blue]

@Blondee365 What is the current visitation now? How often is Dad getting the children?

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

We recently broke up in January of 2018

How is that recently?

 

[stealth2]

I am opting for this agreement because father has a history of bringing 7yo late to school and keeping her home from school for minor things. For example, the anniversary of his fathers passing away. He’s been so negligent that in 2018, CPS was called because our two year old was found wandering in the street by strangers. Also, my ex lives in a small one bedroom apartment with his girlfriend and brother. Therefore the children don’t have a room of their own. The father also has a long history of drug abuse with pills, cocaine, and marijuana. He claims He’s clean from the cocaine and pills now but is still using marijuana and even selling “pot brownies” and other edibles out of his home. Just don’t feel like this is the best place for them to be 50% of the time

Yabbut.... none of that seemed to matter to you when you had two children by him. Seriously.

I will say that he is smart to be asking for a paternity test. It's not personal. But it is smart. My youngest is expecting w/her SO, and I've told him that he would be wise to get one. It protects everyone.