Child threatened my stepdaughter at school

[kik1999]

I have seen restraining orders issued against children. This child if I read correctly has "medical issues". If this child has a history of making threats and violent actions, then it is very possible that a juvenile court judge WOULD issue a restraining order.


Yes, this is correct. The school was well aware of his issues, and explained to my hubby that because of his medical issues, he is always kept a close eye on. My stepdaughter has ADD, the last thing she needs in school is another distraction. I do not let her use her ADD as an excuse to be agressive, not listen, or not try in school. Why should his medical issues be used as an excuse?

I dont know why we haven't banned alcohol. As for golf courses, isn't that just wrongly used pasture field?

Amen! I worked as a bartender for years, and feel that alcohol is the root of many problems. It alters your mind, hinders your ability to make sound decisions and ultimately causes many tragedies, not to mention is highly addictive. We've outlawed all other substances that provide this same reaction...


And if this child has a history of it, the parents may (PLEASE NOTE THE IFS AND MAYS) be facing major problems.

The child has a history of it. Period. Otherwise, why would they ALREADY be checking DAILY for drugs and weapons. That is not something normal elementary schools do to children. I can only speak from my experience, but in my area, that is not the norm.

I do not believe he was overreacting necessarily. Filing a report is not overreacting. Filing for a restraining order is not necessarily overreacting.

Thank you. The restraining order was thought of IN CASE the school refused to remove the child from the same classroom. If the school does not agree, a petition for a RO will be filed so they have no choice but to remove him due to the conditions. I just wasn't sure if it was possible for children.

If he is seriously concerned about his child's safety then it is not overreacting. Other people may believe it is but I also know if I had to I would be getting a restraining order against a child as well.

He seriously has concerns. My stepdaughter is not perfect, she has made her mistakes. I cannot stress enough that these kids are MANDATED to go to school, the LEAST we can do is make sure they are safe while they are there. Childish threat or not, it is not something should joke about. Almost EVERY SINGLE kid who has been involved in following through with a school attack, had warning signs...most of which were ignored. What harm is going to come from removing him from the class? None. What harm could come from leaving him there? Possibilities are endless.

 

[>Charlotte<]

From my personal experience, I want to agree that it's an over-reaction, but my personal experience comes from having been in fourth grade 35 years ago, and being the mother of a fourth grader 19 years ago. What's worse--the result of taking it too seriously, or the result of not taking it seriously enough? I can only think of one way of realizing the latter.

Kids on playgrounds say stupid things just like they always have, but if we had had Google when we were kids, would we have gotten these kinds of search results?

Earlier Wednesday, the 12-year-old was ordered held without bail following his arraignment on rape and murder charges;

TAMPA - A 7-year-old boy viciously beat his infant half sister to death last month, according to police, and now officials are wrestling with how - or if - to prosecute such a young child.

Consider, for example, the instance of a six year old first grader in Flint, Michigan who shot a classmate to death with a .32 caliber semi-automatic weapon.

"[9-year-old] Shanice faces manslaughter charges for allegedly stabbing an 11-year-old friend to death in a dispute over a rubber ball."

The father of an 11-month-old boy fatally beaten at a Woodbridge day care center doesn't blame the center's owner for his son's death, but the 9-year-old boy charged with hitting his son.

An 11-year-old boy who admitted luring a 3-year-old boy from a library and beating him to death with a baseball bat was sentenced in New Jersey on Friday to 18 years in the custody of New Jersey's juvenile-justice system.

 

[kik1999]

From my personal experience, I want to agree that it's an over-reaction, but my personal experience comes from having been in fourth grade 35 years ago, and being the mother of a fourth grader 19 years ago. What's worse--the result of taking it too seriously, or the result of not taking it seriously enough? I can only think of one way of realizing the latter.

Kids on playgrounds say stupid things just like they always have, but if we had had Google when we were kids, would we have gotten these kinds of search results?

Earlier Wednesday, the 12-year-old was ordered held without bail following his arraignment on rape and murder charges;

TAMPA - A 7-year-old boy viciously beat his infant half sister to death last month, according to police, and now officials are wrestling with how - or if - to prosecute such a young child.

Consider, for example, the instance of a six year old first grader in Flint, Michigan who shot a classmate to death with a .32 caliber semi-automatic weapon.

"[9-year-old] Shanice faces manslaughter charges for allegedly stabbing an 11-year-old friend to death in a dispute over a rubber ball."

The father of an 11-month-old boy fatally beaten at a Woodbridge day care center doesn't blame the center's owner for his son's death, but the 9-year-old boy charged with hitting his son.

An 11-year-old boy who admitted luring a 3-year-old boy from a library and beating him to death with a baseball bat was sentenced in New Jersey on Friday to 18 years in the custody of New Jersey's juvenile-justice system.

Thank you, Clt...for justifying my concerns. Of course we want to think that children aren't capable of such terrorizing and devistating tragedies, however, they ARE out there. I don't want to take the risk of ignoring, to have my stepdaughter become one of these terrible stories. Like I said, over-reacting I might be, but what is the harm in removing the child vs. the harm in keeping him there.

Thanks again.

 

[ajritter04]

Yeah, that's us. Kid haters. I simply put mine in Flak jackets and helmets. Saves on all that senseless worry stuff. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Of course this parent has a reason to be CONCERNED, but not to call in the FBI. Get over it.

Show me where I said call the FBI? Man talk about over-reacting how bout you take some of your own advice and get over it.

 

[moburkes]

Ya know...we're ALL entitled to our opinions here, right? Yours isn't any better than mine, just because it's different. I truly appreciate OG's LEGAL response. Frankly, her credentials are well respected in MY OPINION.

I believe since this happened the day after the Cleveland shootings, it was noteworthy of more than a week vacation for this child and back to normal. I believe all children should learn the CONSEQUENCES to their actions. And I'm hoping his parents will get him the help he needs. Once again, I FEEL BAD for this kid. I'm not trying to get him locked up for Christ's sake. But it is not ok to go around JOKING about killing someone, whether you are 5 or 65!

Once again, I will post back as to what happens. The police actually ASKED us to bring the stepdaughter in, so we'll be doing that this afternoon. Whether or not you think my hubby is overreacting is not really the point, I guess. Had he not said anything, he would have been a horrible parent for not protecting his little girl.

It had nothing to do with what should happen to this child, I was simply trying to state that it hits home with US b/c of a near by recent school shooting. I don't think he should get punished more b/c of a totally different situation at a totally different school.

Maybe it is just ME, but the 2 highlighted statements seem to contradict each other.

 

[kik1999]

Maybe it is just ME, but the 2 highlighted statements seem to contradict each other.

In MY opinion, the situation hit closer to home because the DAY BEFORE the Cleveland situation happened.

Do you have any other advice that you haven't mentioned? If not, thanks for your input. It's duly noted.

 

[Ohiogal]

In MY opinion, the situation hit closer to home because the DAY BEFORE the Cleveland situation happened.

Do you have any other advice that you haven't mentioned? If not, thanks for your input. It's duly noted.

Watch it Kik. Don't get smart with Mo. okay? She may disagree with you but she was pointing out something that seemed to contradict.

 

[stealth2]

Cue the "Flight of the Valkyries" music from Apocalypse Now. Colonel Kilgore is on the way!

Education time, Curt. The "Ride of the Valkyries" isn't actually FROM Apocalypse Now. It is from the beginning of Act III of Wagner's Die Walküre (an opera, if you didn't know). 1850+ predates Apocalypse just a *wee* bit.

 

[moburkes]

In MY opinion, the situation hit closer to home because the DAY BEFORE the Cleveland situation happened.

Do you have any other advice that you haven't mentioned? If not, thanks for your input. It's duly noted.

Now, THAT statement made sense. The first one made no sense at all. Glad you had the opportunity to correct/clarify your feelings.

 

[Curt581]

Education time, Curt. The "Ride of the Valkyries" isn't actually FROM Apocalypse Now. It is from the beginning of Act III of Wagner's Die Walküre (an opera, if you didn't know). 1850+ predates Apocalypse just a *wee* bit.

I'm aware.

It was the whole Helicopter Parents, riding to the rescue thing... stress on the 'helicopter' aspect....

But... go ahead, whack me with the trivia stick.

 

[kik1999]

Now, THAT statement made sense. The first one made no sense at all. Glad you had the opportunity to correct/clarify your feelings.

Sorry. Lots of thoughts running through my head all at once. I know what I want to say, but my fingers can't keep up with my thoughts!!

Our main goal, is that the consequences and message get across to the child, the daughter feels safe, and the school doesn't brush this off. There's more harm in brushing it off, than in being cautions. My prayer is that this child get help. He obviously has some severe issues and my heart breaks for him, but our responsibility is to the daughter, not to this little boy. At this age, these kids should be thinking about tag at recess and barbie dolls ~ not violence and fearing their safety. I would MUCH rather be the parent who over-reacts, than a passive person who second guesses my instinct. My main instinct as a parent (and step-parent to THIS child) is to protect their safety when possible. It should not be too much to ask to have this protected at school!

 

[kik1999]

I'm aware.

It was the whole Helicopter Parents, riding to the rescue thing... stress on the 'helicopter' aspect....

But... go ahead, whack me with the trivia stick.

Hell yea we're going to "ride to the rescue". She's 9! She shouldn't have to fend for herself!

 

[Just Blue]

Hell yea we're going to "ride to the rescue". She's 9! She shouldn't have to fend for herself!

For what its worth, I totally agree with you and OG. My daughter was threatened with being raped when she was 9. The GROUP of boys were all 12 or 13. I called and made a police report and all boys were brought into the station..In the end all parents were assuring me that their son's would be properly punished. And they were. I was ready to beat the living daylights out of each and every little basta*d!!

 

[Ohiogal]

For what its worth, I totally agree with you and OG. My daughter was threatened with being raped when she was 9. The GROPE of boys were all 12 or 13. I called and made a police report and all boys were brought into the station..In the end all parents were assuring me that their son's would be properly punished. And they were. I was ready to beat the living daylights out of each and every little basta*d!!

I think you meant group dear. But the fact that you used the word GROPE here was just... err... ummmm... somewhat funny ... inappropriately funny but ummm... yeah....

 

[kik1999]

For what its worth, I totally agree with you and OG. My daughter was threatened with being raped when she was 9. The GROPE of boys were all 12 or 13. I called and made a police report and all boys were brought into the station..In the end all parents were assuring me that their son's would be properly punished. And they were. I was ready to beat the living daylights out of each and every little basta*d!!

Thanks for that support and what a HORRIBLE thing for your daughter to have to go through. We made the report today. The police are visiting the parents, the school and going from there. They said that if the school doesn't comply with our minimum requests, file criminal charges against the child. They 100% support my stepdaughter and my hubby's point of view.

Isn't it amazing how you can keep your cool when it involves your kids, when all you really want to do is grab them by the ear and put the fear of God in them for the pain they caused (or threats made) that hurt your children? I could never hurt a child intentionally, but boy does it take every single OUNCE within me to maintain my control and composure, especially during a situation like this. The fact of the matter is this, I have no idea what this child has gone through in his life, his family background, I mean, his parents could be the greatest people in the world and he just has some type of chemical imbalance that hasn't been diagnosed properly (I say this because there is a history of his medical conditions, not due to this one isolated incident). I am not here to add fuel to the fire or pass judgement. But my hubby, his ex and I will do EVERYTHING in our power to make sure their daughter is safe. School should just be a given.