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MrsK

Senior Member
twosimps said:
MrsK - thank you, I appreciate your opinion. But if the future is the same as the past, he won't pay me anything more than he is required to by law. It's just the way he is. One can always hope though.
Perhaps you could make a deal with him- he gives you XX amt of dollars BEFORE you sign the papers, and you leave out his allowance. Like you said, you can hope. Good luck.
 


carbro

Member
twosimps said:
Oh and for anyone who cares, it wasn't just me wanting answers to these questions. My ex also wanted to know.

Why can't the both of you decide what is fair? I don't believe that your ex wanted to know.

Your looking to get every penny you can.


carbro
 

ceara19

Senior Member
twosimps said:
I understand what you are saying. If I lived closer to the VA, I too would use them.
In Maryland ALONE, there are NINE outpatient clinics, TWO VA medical centers AND a rehabilitation and extended care facility. Are you saying that you are nowhere near ANY of these facilities or the multiple facilities in the surrounding states?
 

twosimps

Junior Member
Carbro - Why is it so hard to believe that my ex wanted this information as well? Did it ever occur to you that he wants to make sure this is done correctly as much as I do? How petty to think I am just after his money. This is for the benefit of our child. Geez, ask a simple question and everyone thinks they have the right to attack ones creditablity.

ceara19 - Not all of these places in MD provides the services that I would need, for one. I can't just call up any VA clinic or office and get an appointment for my disability. For two, why does it matter to anyone whether I get seen at VA or not? Why does it matter?

Does everyone on here just look to attack people or do they really want to help?
 
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twosimps

Junior Member
I haven't asked for one thing in 10 years from my ex. I have never questioned child support before or attempted to increase it in all this time. But the minute I did, my ex was in complete agreement. The only issue was getting the numbers straight...for both of us. My VA benefits were not used to calculate the first order and neither was his clothing allowance. But now he wants to use my VA in the new calculations. Why does it make me greedy or "looking for every penny" to want to include his clothing allowance also? The double standards crack me up. Everyone is so quick to judge me as this greedy, blood-thirsty woman just trying to rip off the ex for that extra dime. I got news for everyone who thinks that. I don't need his money for myself or my bills...it's for his child according to state law. That's it. It's that simple. We don't argue or piss and moan about money or visitation or anything else for that matter. I make a 1/4 of what he makes. It is only right that the increase happen. And according to the lawyer HE consulted, it should have been increased years ago. So if this makes me greedy or grabby or anything else you all want to call me, oh well. I could care less.
 
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ceara19

Senior Member
twosimps said:
ceara19 - Not all of these places in MD provides the services that I would need, for one. I can't just call up any VA clinic or office and get an appointment for my disability. For two, why does it matter to anyone whether I get seen at VA or not? Why does it matter?

Does everyone on here just look to attack people or do they really want to help?
The reason that it matters is because YOU used the excuse that your disability payments are spent on health care instead of being used to replace income loss due to the disability. I was merely pointing out the flaw in your line of thinking.

You have been certified as 20% disabled. At that level, you should be able to receive treatment at almost ANY VA clinic and/or medical center. There are 2 FULL SERVICE medical clinics in Maryland. These facilities are capable of dealing with EVERY health issue.

Just because you don't LIKE the CORRECT LEGAL ANSWER to your question, it in no way means that you are being "attacked". Up to this point, people have tried to help you, but you won't accept the help because it's not what you WANT. However, now that you have decided to bash this site, you have pretty much screwed up any chance of receiving CORRECT, HELPFUL information from anyone here. Most of the members here aren't going to waste their time finding the correct information for a complete stranger if that person is only going to turn around and whine about it because they don't LIKE it. :rolleyes:
 

twosimps

Junior Member
ceara19 - Your answer was neither LEGAL or CORRECT. If you read the Maryland guidelines for child support it states that all allowances received by a military member and VA disability are usable income. My question was as to whether he should be using the allowance as well as me use the diability. None of that has to do with where I seek treatment for my disability. The people who ACTUALLY offered help were thanked and it was appreciated. I am more than willing to accept help, but you are not offering an answer to my questions. You are merely trying to make me look like someone who is just digging for money and only has excuses. My way of thinking may be different than yours, but it isn't flawed. You have your opinion as someone who does not live the life that I live, in the area I live or with the disability that I have. Easy to pass judgement when it isn't you.

I never bashed this site...EVER! On the contrarary. I believe there are plenty of people on this site who are willing to offer their legal advice using their legal experience. The people I referred to were the ones who claimed I was being grabby, looking for pennies, and are more interested in where I seek treatment (which still has absolutely nothing to do with the original question) than whether my child support calculations were correct or not.

You don't have to like my responses. You don't even have to respond. But I would hope that there are still fair minded people out there who can see the ENTIRE picture and not just judge me because I am the one who asked the question. How can you attack someone when you don't even know them? No, I am not going to like every answer I get. But if a person responds in a honest, productive way without attacking me, I have not problem listening to it. It's too bad you think this is whinning. But how would you respond to someone attacking you when you asked a question and were looking for a serious answer?
 

carbro

Member
twosimps said:
Carbro - Why is it so hard to believe that my ex wanted this information as well? Did it ever occur to you that he wants to make sure this is done correctly as much as I do? How petty to think I am just after his money. This is for the benefit of our child. Geez, ask a simple question and everyone thinks they have the right to attack ones creditablity.

ceara19 - Not all of these places in MD provides the services that I would need, for one. I can't just call up any VA clinic or office and get an appointment for my disability. For two, why does it matter to anyone whether I get seen at VA or not? Why does it matter?

Does everyone on here just look to attack people or do they really want to help?

I'll tell you why.

You and your ex must be some real winners. You mean to tell me that you can't sit down together and pound out a budget for your child? NO you cant! You both are that dumb that you are going to let the courts tell the both of you what is fair.

I just don't believe you about the ex wanting the information also. It makes no sense to a normal person.

"Hey ex, can you go on that site and ask if they can tell you what I am suppose to pay? Sure ex husband, I can. You know ex husband, it is great that we are going to go to court and let them decide how much you have to pay. You know we both want whats fair for our child and we can't figure it out on our own...hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Yes ex wife, my brain could not take any more calculation s about our child's financials. I'm so happy the courts understand how to do this.
 

twosimps

Junior Member
Carbro - You really pay attention, don't you? The whole point of working this out ourselves is so that we do not have to go to court! And yes, we do both agree on the increase and we do both want the information to be correct. By coming on this site and asking a question that we have not been able to get a straight answer from anyone made sense. No, he didn't ask me to come on here. I chose to ask myself. That is not to say he did not want the information too. Why would we need to sit down and work out a budget for raising our child together. I raise our child just fine without any budgeting from him. This was all about part of the income that should be included in the calculations that we had a question on. We know how to do the calculations. You sound like the a real piece of work. If it's not normal to get along with the ex, then I guess I'm not normal. If you can't get along with your ex, maybe it's time you grow up.
 
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