Contest paternity request

[Ohiogal]

Oh and you have nothing to argue that he shouldn't be able to establish his paternity to the child he fathered. Keep up your actions and you will lose credibility with the court. And if a GAL is appointed? Yeah.. not going to go well with you.

 

[Zigner]

A father is defined in the law as the one with whom you had sex and inseminated your egg with his sperm.

I'm actually going to disagree on this part of your reply (the rest is spot-on, of course). Since the OP was married at the time of the birth, the husband is presumed to be the legal father. In this case, the biological father is allowed to contest that presumption. Furthermore, in this case, it sounds like the biological father actually WANTS to step up to the plate and be the father (which is the right thing to do).

 

[Ohiogal]

I'm actually going to disagree on this part of your reply (the rest is spot-on, of course). Since the OP was married at the time of the birth, the husband is presumed to be the legal father. In this case, the biological father is allowed to contest that presumption. Furthermore, in this case, it sounds like the biological father actually WANTS to step up to the plate and be the father (which is the right thing to do).

My point is that if the biological father proves paternity, that will be found. I get that hubby is presumed. So the actual Father will be the one who she willingly screwed and allowed to impregnate her. I understand the presumption. But I was beyond that in my point because she said Dad is the one who will raise the child. Well, OP is not allowing the actual biological father to do anything because her feelings are hurt and she is being petty.

 

[Zigner]

My point is that if the biological father proves paternity, that will be found. I get that hubby is presumed. So the actual Father will be the one who she willingly screwed and allowed to impregnate her. I understand the presumption. But I was beyond that in my point because she said Dad is the one who will raise the child. Well, OP is not allowing the actual biological father to do anything because her feelings are hurt and she is being petty.

Yep yep - you're right. I just didn't want the OP to focus on that one statement as a way to justify her delusion.

 

[LdiJ]

I didn't ask to be bashed for the decision I made.
He didn't want a kid now he has just that, No child. Like he demanded. He can live with it. I don't trust him with her.
I asked for advice on whether or not something could be done in court to stop him

Its not at all likely that there is anything that you can do. However, if there is something out there that might allow it, you would need a local family law attorney in your corner. It would not be something that you could do without one.

 

[Pinkie39]

My oldest sister is adopted. My parents adopted her as a baby, and told her when she was a young toddler that she was adopted. Her daughter was adopted by her husband when she was one. My niece has known since she was very young that Dad was not her biological father.

My brother raised two stepsons from his first marriage, like his own kids, from the time they were babies. Their fathers were never involved in their lives. But they've known since they were very young that the man they've always called Dad is actually stepdad. He's still Dad to them now they're grown men, and their mom has been divorced from him for over a decade.

None of them have suffered for growing up always knowing that the people they've thought of as Mom or Dad aren't biologically related to them. But I can imagine how hurt they would be if they didn't find that out until they were teens or adults.

 

[Eekamouse]

I didn't ask to be bashed for the decision I made.
He didn't want a kid now he has just that, No child. Like he demanded. He can live with it. I don't trust him with her.
I asked for advice on whether or not something could be done in court to stop him

He probably just didn't want a kid with you. So what? Nothing you can do is going to change the reality that this is his child and you don't get to dictate whether he has a relationship with her, once paternity has been established. Better get your head around that now. Who cares if you don't trust him with her? That will count for nothing in court.

 

[stealth2]

None of them have suffered for growing up always knowing that the people they've thought of as Mom or Dad aren't biologically related to them. But I can imagine how hurt they would be if they didn't find that out until they were teens or adults.

And that is the crux of the matter. That would likely shatter the bedrock upon which their existence is formed. Adoption is a wonderful gift and is not something to be ashamed of. But every child deserves to know where s/he comes from. Hopefully, with some introspection, OP can come to realize that she need not hide the truth from her child.

 

[commentator]

Back in the days before DNA, in my part of the world, there were a lot of "come by chance" kids running around. It wasn't really such a stigma for the men in our small rural community, back in the "good old days" when we had, you know, real values and all. And if a woman was sinful and allowed herself to become pregnant by someone who wasn't married to her, well, it was all on the woman. She was the sorry one, not the daddy who never acknowledged paternity or lifted a finger to help her.

I don't miss those good old days one tiny bit! But you know what? As far as paternity was concerned those kids as they grew up, heredity being what it is, and in VERY few cases could you not just look at these people and tell exactly who their parents were. And they grew up knowing that, and knowing that this person they were in school with was probably their half sister or brother.....etc. This child will find out, will know, and your biological parent is something you should explain to the child early and often, even if they are being raised by another loving parent figure.

It sounds like this guy has gotten a new girlfriend or an attack of conscience or something, and has decided he wants to have a relationship with this child. Whether you trust him with her or not. You made the decisions that led to the circumstances you have. All you can do is hire a very good attorney to lead you through this and do what they say.