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Custody/Visitation

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momxthree

Member
What is the name of your state? Louisiana

Long history, but will just go back to the last court order (Feb. 2007).
I filed in January 07 for contempt of non payment of CS. He countered that I was not sharing information about the children and not letting him communicate with them. He also wanted a new visitation schedule since he relocated to CA . He was found in contempt, ordered to pay arrears within a year, ordered to pay my attorney fees and court costs and income assignment put in place. I was not found in contempt because I produced a 500 page call log for 12 months prior to our court date showing all calls going back and forth between the children and him. I also brought a STACK (almost a ream of paper) showing e-mails that I sent to him telling him everything from how the youngest was doing potty training, to any and all doctor's visits, grades, school activities... on and on. I also sent them to CA for Christmas (just two months prior to the court date) without a court order because it was the right thing to do, so I was not keeping them from him!! Our order says that we are to keep each other informed of phone numbers, addresses, work etc. etc.

Now, three days after court (Feb 2007) he disappeared. Changed his cell phone number, moved, quit his job. He would call sporadically (once every three months or so) from different numbers to speak to the children. I tracked him at three different jobs, each time I sent the Income Assignment Order he would quit. I got one check in a year. Now, he sits in jail awaiting trial for two felony charges (Assault with deadly weapon and possession of a stolen vehicle). He has no job, car, or home. However, he still has joint custody and visitation rights. There is also a warrant for his arrest here in LA for assault on a police officer.

I want to file for sole custody and supervised visitation. I have an attorney, but would like to get your opinions before I starting shelling out the big bucks again. Do I have a case?

I'm sure you will need more information so please ask, just didn't want to write a book!
And I thank each and every one of you for your advice/butt chewing and or anything else that is offered. I don't post much but I read every day and have nothing but respect for what you guys do (okay, enough butt kissing..just wanted ya'll to know I can 'take it')
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
In jail he cannot get any visitation. Wait until he is convicted and your case will be a lot easier. He could be innocent.
 

momxthree

Member
So,

Currently, he has been in jail since October. His trial has been continued twice because the witness hasn't shown up. There is a chance that he won't show again and the charge will be dismissed. As for the possession of a stolen vehicle, not sure about that one. OG, are you saying that without a conviction I don't have a chance? The whole idea of having to send certified letters to a person in jail to get permission to seek professional counseling for his children who need counseling because HE is in jail (yes, they know... and I didn't tell them) is utterly ridiculous to me, however, it is an order therefore I did it. The warrant here in LA is because he was convicted of assaulting a police officer but did not attend the anger management classes as he was ordered. Does that mean anything?
I hope I don't sound stoo-pid for saying this but to put three children on a plane (the youngest who is three) 1800 miles away and I don't even know where he is going live if/when he gets out of jail, seems well, REAL stupid! Couldn't that be seen as neglect on my part?
 
OG, are you saying that without a conviction I don't have a chance?
I think she said it would make it easier. But if he is in jail then it would make it easier to serve him custody papers and keep him there until he comes up with some of the back CS. I was never sure how that worked..like getting blood from a turnip. :confused:
 

momxthree

Member
The 'turnip' thing, so true

I'm not worried about child support. I don't count on it because I know that I can't. I'm worried about our children. This is a person who was a police officer for much of our marriage and honestly, I do not know or understand what happened. I know he loves his daughters, I KNOW that. But I don't know how many more broken promises these girls can take. And given the past three years, I'm afraid that he is not capable of making good choices while they are in his care. That is my opinion, based on known, provable facts. However, I do understand that it is just MY opinion.
New Question:
Would I be within my rights to refuse visitation without knowing where he lives, his phone number? 1800 miles away and no way to contact the children, that makes my stomach turn.
I'm worried that if he is released he will just 'show up' on my door step wanting to take them (has happened before).
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Currently, he has been in jail since October. His trial has been continued twice because the witness hasn't shown up. There is a chance that he won't show again and the charge will be dismissed. As for the possession of a stolen vehicle, not sure about that one. OG, are you saying that without a conviction I don't have a chance? The whole idea of having to send certified letters to a person in jail to get permission to seek professional counseling for his children who need counseling because HE is in jail (yes, they know... and I didn't tell them) is utterly ridiculous to me, however, it is an order therefore I did it. The warrant here in LA is because he was convicted of assaulting a police officer but did not attend the anger management classes as he was ordered. Does that mean anything?
I hope I don't sound stoo-pid for saying this but to put three children on a plane (the youngest who is three) 1800 miles away and I don't even know where he is going live if/when he gets out of jail, seems well, REAL stupid! Couldn't that be seen as neglect on my part?
Well file an emergency motion to temporarily suspend visitation until such time as you know whether he has been convicted and THEN file for sole custody. Because the conviction will make it much easier to get a custody change. Supervised visitation you do not need to ask for at this time. JUST SUSPEND the visitation due to the incarceration and lack of housing. Then with the conviction file for sole custody with a continued suspension of visitation. That forces dad to repetition for visitation once he is released.
 

momxthree

Member
Thank you!!!

Ginny, yes it is in the order that we are to keep each other informed of phone numbers, addresses and employment. Mine haven't changed (same job 11 years, cell phone 6 years and address 2 years) so he knows where I am.

OG, Thank you very much. btw, I said earlier that I read every day and sometimes you get a bad 'rap' for being tough, but you remind me so much of my own attorney!!! And I LOVE HER and my ex HATES her which makes me LOVE her more, haha!

Thanks and hope everyone has a safe and happy holiday (GEAUX TIGERS, sorry had to slip that in)!
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Ginny, yes it is in the order that we are to keep each other informed of phone numbers, addresses and employment. Mine haven't changed (same job 11 years, cell phone 6 years and address 2 years) so he knows where I am.

OG, Thank you very much. btw, I said earlier that I read every day and sometimes you get a bad 'rap' for being tough, but you remind me so much of my own attorney!!! And I LOVE HER and my ex HATES her which makes me LOVE her more, haha!

Thanks and hope everyone has a safe and happy holiday (GEAUX TIGERS, sorry had to slip that in)!
Thank you Momxthree. I appreciate it. But have your attorney file to suspend visitation currently until such time as his legal problems are dealt with and you know his living situation (as in address, telephone, and so on).
 

momxthree

Member
Done!

OG, I've already sent my attorney an e-mail to do as you've suggested. I offered her my BCS National Championship tickets to get it done like yesterday, but alas she already has hers (my husband would have killed me if she actually took me up on it)!
Thanks again!
 

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