Daughter wants to change high schools

[PTRU78]

Orange County California. Dad and mom share 50/50 legal and physical custody. Daughter is 15 years old. Daughter has been going to school by mom in orange county but wants to change schools to near dad in Riverside County California. Mom does not want daughter to change schools stating she just re-signed her lease and that dad would be responsible for any fines incurred in breaking said lease. Mom refuses to do any traveling. Daughter was sexually assaulted at her school by moms house in Orange County which led to a police investigation and suspension, Juvenal hall time for the other student involved. The school did not expel the other student. My (dad) take on this is daughter can choose to go to school wherever she wants and her mom will just have to deal with her living situation and travel. My daughter is terrified of her mom to the point where it influences her decisions. I (dad) am a homeowner in Riverside County California. Mom leases an apartment. Our court order stated only daughter remain at current school in 2015 but no restrictions after that time.

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[Zigner]

Orange County California. Dad and mom share 50/50 legal and physical custody. Daughter is 15 years old. Daughter has been going to school by mom in orange county but wants to change schools to near dad in Riverside County California. Mom does not want daughter to change schools stating she just re-signed her lease and that dad would be responsible for any fines incurred in breaking said lease. Mom refuses to do any traveling. Daughter was sexually assaulted at her school by moms house in Orange County which led to a police investigation and suspension, Juvenal hall time for the other student involved. The school did not expel the other student. My (dad) take on this is daughter can choose to go to school wherever she wants and her mom will just have to deal with her living situation and travel. My daughter is terrified of her mom to the point where it influences her decisions. I (dad) am a homeowner in Riverside County California. Mom leases an apartment. Our court order stated only daughter remain at current school in 2015 but no restrictions after that time.

Any advice would be appreciated.

If the two of you cannot agree upon this, then you'll need to go back to court.

 

[Just Blue]

Orange County California. Dad and mom share 50/50 legal and physical custody. Daughter is 15 years old. Daughter has been going to school by mom in orange county but wants to change schools to near dad in Riverside County California. Mom does not want daughter to change schools stating she just re-signed her lease and that dad would be responsible for any fines incurred in breaking said lease. Mom refuses to do any traveling. Daughter was sexually assaulted at her school by moms house in Orange County which led to a police investigation and suspension, Juvenal hall time for the other student involved. The school did not expel the other student. My (dad) take on this is daughter can choose to go to school wherever she wants and her mom will just have to deal with her living situation and travel. My daughter is terrified of her mom to the point where it influences her decisions. I (dad) am a homeowner in Riverside County California. Mom leases an apartment. Our court order stated only daughter remain at current school in 2015 but no restrictions after that time.

Any advice would be appreciated.

You will need to go to court and request a new court order. I'm so sorry your DD was assaulted...hopefully she is in therapy.

 

[LdiJ]

If the two of you cannot agree upon this, then you'll need to go back to court.

Yes, and while a judge might take your child's wishes into consideration, her wishes absolutely do NOT control...therefore your take is absolutely incorrect.

I will also add that you virtually have no chance of having enough time to get a court ordered modification before school starts, so your only real hope is to get it ordered for the second semester, and again, its not a slam dunk.

I think that you have a shot at it if you do it right, through court, but you could really mess that shot up if you try to force anything without court approval.

 

[PTRU78]

I am aware we will end up in court. I do not have the money for attornies at this time. The last time we went to court cost me a lot of money only for the courts to ask my daughter what she wanted to do and back in 2014 it was to live with me in Riverside County and go to school with her mom in Orange County which the judge seemed to think was a good idea. And you can imagine how complicated that arrangement makes everyday life for all involved. Now my daughter is not too pleased staying with her narcissist alcoholic mother and going to a school she is not comfortable in. My daughter does see a therapist by her school but the therapist is very young and inexperienced. I want to take my daughter to my therapist but her mom will not sign the required paperwork. Her mom is being difficult because she wants to take me back to court for more child support and wants my daughter with her more than 50% so she can get more money.

 

[TheGeekess]

I am aware we will end up in court. I do not have the money for attornies at this time. The last time we went to court cost me a lot of money only for the courts to ask my daughter what she wanted to do and back in 2014 it was to live with me in Riverside County and go to school with her mom in Orange County which the judge seemed to think was a good idea. And you can imagine how complicated that arrangement makes everyday life for all involved. Now my daughter is not too pleased staying with her narcissist alcoholic mother and going to a school she is not comfortable in. My daughter does see a therapist by her school but the therapist is very young and inexperienced. I want to take my daughter to my therapist but her mom will not sign the required paperwork. Her mom is being difficult because she wants to take me back to court for more child support and wants my daughter with her more than 50% so she can get more money.

And suddenly, Mom is an alcoholic narcissist and the rest of the plot thickens.

 

[xylene]

Borrow money for a lawyer.

 

[justalayman]

If you have joint legal custody you don’t need moms permission to take the child to a different therapist.

 

[LdiJ]

If you have joint legal custody you don’t need moms permission to take the child to a different therapist.

I dunno, that seems to be one of those things that parents need to agree about...changing a child's therapist or doctor.

 

[t74]

At the very least your DD has good reason to attend a different school in mother's district. I cannot imagine that an intra-district transfer request because of the assault would be denied.

 

[justalayman]

I dunno, that seems to be one of those things that parents need to agree about...changing a child's therapist or doctor.

Well, one of the websites from one of the counties out there said exactly that.