Divorce,separation, division of assests

[nextwife]

Conversely, if these are DOCUMENTABLE as PREMARITAL (or individually inherited, gifted), non-comingled assets, he can use them as he wishes. Say, if his dad gifted him alone $10,000 a few years ago, he had every right to maintain it in a seperate account.

 

[john a ungaro]

You two have been married for a very long time. If you are controlling that is something that you can change. Have you considered offering to go to marriage counseling? Of course, that only works if you take it seriously.

She will not considerate it! Afraid I will control the counselor! She's not budging, just cold and indifferent and thinks I will not change, but I have!

 

[Ohiogal]

I meant safe as in available to him at this time rather than to her. I did emphasize that he will have to account for the cash in the divorce proceedings.

I did not want OP believing that because the money is just in an account with his name on it that means he can spend it whenever. you did state that. And I agree. he will have to account for it. And it may very well be marital property unless as NW says in the second next post it is considered separate property. But even then he may have to account for HOW it is separate property and PROVE it.

 

[Ohiogal]

She will not considerate it! Afraid I will control the counselor! She's not budging, just cold and indifferent and thinks I will not change, but I have!

You refer to your wife as cold and indifferent? How long have you been controlling and trying to control her? Maybe your actions made her cold and indifferent because she has heard you state you have changed before and she found out you had not.

 

[john a ungaro]

out the door

You refer to your wife as cold and indifferent? How long have you been controlling and trying to control her? Maybe your actions made her cold and indifferent because she has heard you state you have changed before and she found out you had not.

We had a loving and very romantic relationship until the day she walked out the door. Now by herself, with new-found independence she says how she feels. Would have helped and changed things if she spoke up before it came to that point. You are perfectly correct that my controlling attitude had given her built-up anxiety and pressure that probably caused her to explode inside and finally shut down. It is very important that people express how they are hurting. Men can't read minds, but we certainly can understand if we hear something verbalized! Wish she would have given me that chance. An ultimatum would have made a difference in my behavior. If only I had known how she was feeling! If only! She's been the love of my life and a precious gift from God!

 

[Ohiogal]

We had a loving and very romantic relationship until the day she walked out the door. Now by herself, with new-found independence she says how she feels. Would have helped and changed things if she spoke up before it came to that point. You are perfectly correct that my controlling attitude had given her built-up anxiety and pressure that probably caused her to explode inside and finally shut down. It is very important that people express how they are hurting. Men can't read minds, but we certainly can understand if we hear something verbalized! Wish she would have given me that chance. An ultimatum would have made a difference in my behavior. If only I had known how she was feeling! If only! She's been the love of my life and a precious gift from God!

Never said you needed to read minds and agree that you shouldn't have to. I misunderstood how you were referring to it because you acknowledge that you behaved that way. And just misread the situation. I respect your position on the matter and wish you the best of luck. If however she wants a divorce she will get one.

 

[Bali Hai]

The wise and Godly ways are always the correct paths to take! Thanks for setting me straight! Who knows maybe she would be willing. Her only problem with me is that I am controlling. God's mercy and grace is new everyday and I need to show the same to others. Sometimes the right paths are the hardest to take, especially like finding joy in one's tribulations! Bless you for the wise advice!

PRAISE THE LORD!! God is greater than the wisest man, but not smarter than a woman in divorce!!

 

[tuffbrk]

I also have a seperate account my wife does not know about? What can I do to protect my money from her touching any of it? Help, please!

Who else earning a mere $15k for the past 3 years would be concerned about disclosing accts, etc. Your control issue is in high gear because she wants a divorce, not you. You liked sitting around the past few years, don't appreciate her upsetting the apple cart...and now you're trying to figure out how to defraud her, divert funds and hide accounts..because she's not managing things YOUR way! Really, it's quite simple and well, Glory be - the truth at last!!