depressedsoul38499
New member
What is the name of your state? New York
I am bedridden. I have severe scoliosis and I sit the whole day watching TV and reading in my wheelchair. I can't move. It is downright depressing.
I troll and make up stuff all the time posting it online. I admit it. Why? I can't use my imagination for anything else. I can't have a job, I can't date, I can't travel, I can't have fun. I am a hopeless human. I am dumb. I am hopeless. I have nothing to live for unlike you guys but I do so because I don't have the will to kill myself.
This right here is my social interaction for the day. This message I am sending you guys is my social life. Nobody wants to be friends with a disabled man like myself. When people message me, when people ban me, and when people comment on posts I make online it feels like I have a voice and that people care about me. It is so hard to live this way and to spam sites just to be heard in this world. I am 25, I am disabled, and I am hopeless, and I am a troll. That is my life.
I have made 400-500 posts on a website called reddit. Mainly on the reddit forums related to legal advice but also on some other subreddits. That is the only place I have trolled on.
It has hurt for me to admit all of this.
However, I am trying to get help and I have been seeing a therapist for around two weeks via Skype. It is a service I found online and I want to help myself to recover from this depression. However, I am worried about my past activities online. I never made any threats, never harassed anybody, and never committed any crimes in reality. I just made a bunch of fake posts and fake stories online. Some were creepy but that is it. I got called some vile names by people, but that is about it.
As I try to reform myself and make the most out of my pathetic life situation do you guys think I should worry about these past posts online?
Thanks for your help in advance. I really appreciate it.
I am bedridden. I have severe scoliosis and I sit the whole day watching TV and reading in my wheelchair. I can't move. It is downright depressing.
I troll and make up stuff all the time posting it online. I admit it. Why? I can't use my imagination for anything else. I can't have a job, I can't date, I can't travel, I can't have fun. I am a hopeless human. I am dumb. I am hopeless. I have nothing to live for unlike you guys but I do so because I don't have the will to kill myself.
This right here is my social interaction for the day. This message I am sending you guys is my social life. Nobody wants to be friends with a disabled man like myself. When people message me, when people ban me, and when people comment on posts I make online it feels like I have a voice and that people care about me. It is so hard to live this way and to spam sites just to be heard in this world. I am 25, I am disabled, and I am hopeless, and I am a troll. That is my life.
I have made 400-500 posts on a website called reddit. Mainly on the reddit forums related to legal advice but also on some other subreddits. That is the only place I have trolled on.
It has hurt for me to admit all of this.
However, I am trying to get help and I have been seeing a therapist for around two weeks via Skype. It is a service I found online and I want to help myself to recover from this depression. However, I am worried about my past activities online. I never made any threats, never harassed anybody, and never committed any crimes in reality. I just made a bunch of fake posts and fake stories online. Some were creepy but that is it. I got called some vile names by people, but that is about it.
As I try to reform myself and make the most out of my pathetic life situation do you guys think I should worry about these past posts online?
Thanks for your help in advance. I really appreciate it.