do i have to marry to live with my bf?

[Bloopy]

It's what I call trying to be independently dependent. I want to be grown and an adult one minute. I want to have sex, have babies, go out, party and all that good stuff, but I still need my mommy and daddy to pay for the roof over my head, the food on the table and the toilet paper to wipe my azz.

I was a married adult in grad school when my hubby had to continue his program out of state.

I went to live with Mommy and Daddy because we couldn’t maintain two apartments. It was culturally appropriate for my family.

I was a married adult submitting to the rules of the matriarch. That would the not-so-attractive side of the other culture. I’m certainly “American” enough to want my mum to mind her own business. But I don’t get to cherry-pick cultural norms, it’s a package deal.

 

[3UofMfans]

Just want to give my two cents on this subject.

4 years ago I lost my job in the mortgage industry (We all know where that industry is headed). My children and I moved in with my parents for a short time. With unemployment up and the economy doing poorly it is no surprise that we see this happening more. Sometimes life just deals you a hand that requires us to ask for help. Although it is not easy to ask I did what I had to for my children.

My landlord and his wife and children live with his mom. Dad died a few years back and they moved in to help mom with the house etc. This is not uncommom in the rural area that I live in.

You never know why people do things that they do. I would imagine there are very few people on here that would allow their child to be homeless if circumstances were beyond their control.

 

[CourtClerk]

If you lose your job or some other catastrophic event happens to you, then going home to live with your parents while you regroup and get back on your feet is one thing.

Never leaving the nest and procreating is another. Even while you're regrouping, there is nothing that says that you have to take your boyfriend/girlfriend with you under your parent's roof. Come on now, they aren't your spouse, they are not legally obligated to take care of you, or you them, and even more... they didn't even see fit for to actually make a committment to you, they only supplied the sperm/ovum necessary for you to push out a baby.

 

[CJane]

Yeah, I certainly wasn't commenting on people who make the appropriate and TEMPORARY decision to move in with family. My sister did it when she moved back to the area after living in Colorado for a couple of years. She was looking for a job and housing and living with one of our other sisters while she did so. It was a 3 month arrangement.

One of my other sisters moved back in w/my parents briefly while looking for an apartment when SHE moved back to the area too.

I get the idea of an unplanned pregnancy keeping someone at home in order to save money/have a sitter/focus on the future/etc.

What I was commenting on is this seemingly increasing number of people who automatically move back in w/parents/friends/whomever just because they can. Or the people who, for some reason, think that 'signing custody' of their children over to their parents is an excellent parenting decision when they're just 'not quite ready' to be a parent.

It's weird. And a little disheartening.