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Eviction help

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Seriously -

Hey son, as your parents we were happy to help when you were about to be evicted, but it is time for you to start making plans to move out on your own. I want to give you adequate time to find a place and pack things up - Jan 1 2025 is about 3 months away. Let's start the new year in our own spaces so that other parent and I can go back to enjoying the slower lifestyle we need, and you can have the privacy and space you need. We will help you by providing $X to your new landlord towards the security deposit.


Then follow up with a certified letter to your son. You can soften the blow of that letter by including a note along the lines of:
I know I have hinted that it might be time to move out a few times, and perhaps I have been too subtle, so to make sure there is no confusion, so this is in writing.

If Son does not move out by 1/1/2025, then it is time to think about eviction.
 

quincy

Senior Member
Seriously -

Hey son, as your parents we were happy to help when you were about to be evicted, but it is time for you to start making plans to move out on your own. I want to give you adequate time to find a place and pack things up - Jan 1 2025 is about 3 months away. Let's start the new year in our own spaces so that other parent and I can go back to enjoying the slower lifestyle we need, and you can have the privacy and space you need. We will help you by providing $X to your new landlord towards the security deposit.


Then follow up with a certified letter to your son. You can soften the blow of that letter by including a note along the lines of:
I know I have hinted that it might be time to move out a few times, and perhaps I have been too subtle, so to make sure there is no confusion, so this is in writing.

If Son does not move out by 1/1/2025, then it is time to think about eviction.
While that sounds all nice and good, the son and his family have been living with JRsr since October 2022.

It sounds like JRsr is done with the niceties, hence JRsr coming here specifically asking for help in understanding the eviction process. I don’t think anyone starts investigating the eviction process or jumps into evicting family members until all other efforts to get these family members to leave have failed.

That said, JRsr certainly has been provided with options. If he doesn’t want to be back here in 2026 with the same complaint, though, he probably should stop talking and start acting.
 

Litigator22

Active Member
Seriously -

Hey son, as your parents we were happy to help when you were about to be evicted, but it is time for you to start making plans to move out on your own. I want to give you adequate time to find a place and pack things up - Jan 1 2025 is about 3 months away. Let's start the new year in our own spaces so that other parent and I can go back to enjoying the slower lifestyle we need, and you can have the privacy and space you need. We will help you by providing $X to your new landlord towards the security deposit.


Then follow up with a certified letter to your son. You can soften the blow of that letter by including a note along the lines of:
I know I have hinted that it might be time to move out a few times, and perhaps I have been too subtle, so to make sure there is no confusion, so this is in writing.

If Son does not move out by 1/1/2025, then it is time to think about eviction.
In case you failed to notice it the OP is asking help in adhering to the jural processes in the state of Virginia needed to evict a residential tenant. Not only has he not asked for passive, alternative means of ridding of the unwanted occupants, but telling him when in the future he should start thinking about seeking a legal remedy of freeing up the property seems utterly pointless.
 
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quincy

Senior Member
JRsr’s passivity appears to be exactly why JRsr’s son has been able to take up a two-year residency in JRsr’s home in the first place.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
JRsr’s passivity appears to be exactly why JRsr’s son has been able to take up a two-year residency in JRsr’s home in the first place.
While that is probably true, its also very normal. Most people would want to help out their adult children in similar circumstances. Obviously in Jrsr's case it has not gone well enough to continue, but that doesn't make it less normal.
 
In case you failed to notice it the OP is asking help in adhering to the jural processes in the state of Virginia needed to evict a residential tenant. Not only has he not asked for passive, alternative means of ridding of the unwanted occupants, but telling him when in the future he should start thinking about seeking a legal remedy of freeing up the property seems utterly pointless.

OP says that son "won’t take a hint" - and I am taking OP at face value that there have only been hints instead of "You need to move out by this date."

Evicting is the nuclear option, and since there may be grandchildren involved (son's family vs son and spouse), OP could be ending any access to those grandchildren by choosing to evict and kicking the son and family to the curb.
 

quincy

Senior Member
While that is probably true, its also very normal. Most people would want to help out their adult children in similar circumstances. Obviously in Jrsr's case it has not gone well enough to continue, but that doesn't make it less normal.
I agree that it is normal to want to help your children.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
OP says that son "won’t take a hint" - and I am taking OP at face value that there have only been hints instead of "You need to move out by this date."

Evicting is the nuclear option, and since there may be grandchildren involved (son's family vs son and spouse), OP could be ending any access to those grandchildren by choosing to evict and kicking the son and family to the curb.
Yes, which is why that it is fair that some of us have warned the OP that there could be family ramifications and discomfort during the process. It is certainly one of the reason that I recommended that he stop hinting and be more direct before going with the nuclear option.
 
I agree that it is normal to want to help your children.

Especially now - when housing is so very expensive. I can imagine if I let my child and his family to move in when facing eviction, and they were not being appropriately appreciative, contributing financially and with chores, I would be peeved. And it is hard to sit down and have that conversation if you are used to beating around the bush with difficult topics.

OP: Have you had a serious discussion with your son about the situation?
 
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quincy

Senior Member
… I allowed my son and his family to move in with me in late October of 2022. They were about to get evicted in PA now for many reasons they need to go and won’t take a hint. What is the correct legal process to evict them? …
I suppose what direction JRsr decides to take to get his son and family to leave will depend largely on the “many reasons they need to go.” JRsr seems to think eviction is necessary.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I suppose what direction JRsr decides to take to get his son and family to leave will depend largely on the “many reasons they need to go.” JRsr seems to think eviction is necessary.
Or JRsr hasn't thought it through. When someone is at the point that all they have done is hint, its probably not a good idea to go nuclear just yet. Yes, going nuclear may absolutely be necessary, but maybe not quite yet.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
OP says that son "won’t take a hint" - and I am taking OP at face value that there have only been hints instead of "You need to move out by this date."

Evicting is the nuclear option, and since there may be grandchildren involved (son's family vs son and spouse), OP could be ending any access to those grandchildren by choosing to evict and kicking the son and family to the curb.
Exactly!
 

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