Ex with custody shipped to Iraq

[MomTryin2Improv]

The attorney's you consulted correctly informed you of your chances with your history of substance abuse and for that you don't have any emergency grounds. It is also true that the SSCRA will affect your right to petition to modify any custody order. If you are low on funds continue to research how to make your motions and when you have custody of your child, then file the motion in the county in CO with jurisdiction. That will also give you more time to prove you are clean and sober.

I understand what you are telling me, however my ex will not let me have ANY custody while he is over seas. He says I can go to AK to see her, but if I try to leave with her will get me for kidnapping. Am I really out of options?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

I understand what you are telling me, however my ex will not let me have ANY custody while he is over seas. He says I can go to AK to see her, but if I try to leave with her will get me for kidnapping. Am I really out of options?

The court order says "subtantially equal parenting time...the parties are not setting out a specific schedule...". It's been extremely hard to get that time because of the distance between us, and I've been genuinely concerned with tugging her between the two of us. It also states that "the party with whom the child is found shall promptly report any major problem concerning the general health or welfare of the child...." and "Each parent witll inform the other parent of any changes of business or residential address..within 7 days of the change". I would think this is an extreme problem concerning her welfare, wouldn't you? I had planned to go see her for her birthday in October...I think that's the only reason he finally told me! Otherwise, I wasn't expecting her for a visit until Christmas!
I found a form online- "Motion for Temporary Orders" Is this what I'm looking for?

OK. So I'm getting pretty discouraged. I've talked to 3 or 4 lawyers, and they all pretty much tell me the same thing- my daughter's step-mom has a better legal history than I do (mine includes a meth conviction, but my life is absolutely turned around now- I have a good job, am doing well with probation, and have been clean for 9 months.) and therefore I will have a hard time getting even temporary custody. Any thoughts?

P.S...custody was not taken away from me by the courts...I did so voluntarily to get my life back together so I could be a better mom.

Then you go to the court in CO and file for contempt since he didn't inform you of his deployment according to the language of the order and petition the court for tempoary custody of your child,an order to return the child to CO and your parenting time since CP had essentially abandoned his child. DO you know what his family plan states re custody/guardianship of your child? Can you prove to the court that you are stable? Have you been getting regular UA etc? Are you willing to submit to hair analysis?

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

Yes, I am stable, and I have been under supervised probation so I have had random UAs. I will take any kind of drug screen they want, including hair follicle testing. Also, the SP is not named in any part of our parenting agreement, so I don't see how she can have physical guardianship at all. I went to the courthouse this morning to file for temporary custody, but they told me I could only file to modify since I don't have a lawyer, and nothing else. I was under the impression that I can't modify if he's overseas...is there a difference between modifying and getting a temporary order?

 

[rmet4nzkx]

You can file contempt and the associated orders.
His military "family plan" may include guardianship, that is separate from your parenting plan.
Call JAG at the base in AK and inform them that he abandoned his child and refuses to return the child to the other parent (you) and may have falsified other documents unknown to you at htis time, eg. he may be representing his current wife as the mother, Inform them that contempt charges will be filed if the childis not returned to you. Be prepared to fax your court orders, SSCRS won't help him if he commited perjury in any of the government documents.

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

You can file contempt and the associated orders.
His military "family plan" may include guardianship, that is separate from your parenting plan.
Call JAG at the base in AK and inform them that he abandoned his child and refuses to return the child to the other parent (you) and may have falsified other documents unknown to you at htis time, eg. he may be representing his current wife as the mother, Inform them that contempt charges will be filed if the childis not returned to you. Be prepared to fax your court orders, SSCRS won't help him if he commited perjury in any of the government documents.

Do I tell them he left her with her sp? Does his 'family plan' have any weight with the court, and can it replace her as the physical guardian? Will contempt charges hold?
I feel like a blind lab rat in a maze!

 

[LdiJ]

Do I tell them he left her with her sp? Does his 'family plan' have any weight with the court, and can it replace her as the physical guardian? Will contempt charges hold?
I feel like a blind lab rat in a maze!

No, the "family plan" does not have any weight in civilian court. The family plan cannot give her guardianship when there is another parent. That has to be decided by the civilian courts.

Again, you need to get your paperwork filed ASAP.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Of course you have to let them know where you believe the child is, how can they help you otherwise? You may not have access to the "family plan" but JAG does, and they are responsible for the military side including if he provided false information and or to enforce civil orders already in place, both things not affected by SSCRA. Unless they were deployed under secret orders, he had sufficient time to comply with the court order and to inform you and to provide you with your equal custody, unless there is an order, not an agreement, limiting your custody to supervised visitation.

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

Of course you have to let them know where you believe the child is, how can they help you otherwise? You may not have access to the "family plan" but JAG does, and they are responsible for the military side including if he provided false information and or to enforce civil orders already in place, both things not affected by SSCRA. Unless they were deployed under secret orders, he had sufficient time to comply with the court order and to inform you and to provide you with your equal custody, unless there is an order, not an agreement, limiting your custody to supervised visitation.

What I have, as far as paperwork is concerned, is a parenting plan...sorry to sound idiotic, but that does qualify as a CO, right? So the contempt could hold?

 

[CJane]

What I have, as far as paperwork is concerned, is a parenting plan...sorry to sound idiotic, but that does qualify as a CO, right? So the contempt could hold?

If it's signed by a judge, it's a court order.

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

Omg I May Have A Breakthrough

ok....so I'm trying not to get too excited. The parenting plan modification that gave my ex custody was filed in November '04. The judge requested a child support worksheet from my ex's lawyer, but the lawyer did not fulfill that request, so the judge never signed to accept the order! Before this modification request, I had full custody of my daughter. Does this mean that the original order still stands??? I am shaking, I'm trying not to get excited!
Does this mean what I think it does??

 

[rmet4nzkx]

ok....so I'm trying not to get too excited. The parenting plan modification that gave my ex custody was filed in November '04. The judge requested a child support worksheet from my ex's lawyer, but the lawyer did not fulfill that request, so the judge never signed to accept the order! Before this modification request, I had full custody of my daughter. Does this mean that the original order still stands??? I am shaking, I'm trying not to get excited!
Does this mean what I think it does??

Breathe......
Yes, that means the original order is still in effect, but check with the court and see if there is any other order since then. File for contempt and for an order to return the child to CO, you might call the DA office if your custody order is still valid and file a child abduction report, they may be of assistance in returning your child, you may still need to call JAG but verify your order first, then call the DA and go from there. DO you have a copy of the "Valid" order?

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

Breathe......
Yes, that means the original order is still in effect, but check with the court and see if there is any other order since then. File for contempt and for an order to return the child to CO, you might call the DA office if your custody order is still valid and file a child abduction report, they may be of assistance in returning your child, you may still need to call JAG but verify your order first, then call the DA and go from there. DO you have a copy of the "Valid" order?

The courts told me that there was a modification submitted, but that the judge did not accept it yet because my ex's lawyer didn't turn in the child support worksheet. I'm worried about one thing- I did sign the submitted modification...is there any way it could still be accepted? What do I need to do to make sure it won't be? Can I withdraw it or something like that? Also, how stupid would it be to just ask that she be returned before I go to the extent of filing contempt or child abduction? Probably really stupid, huh?
Oh, and my dad is going back to that county to pick up a copy of the effective order right now, so I should have it in about 3 hours....

 

[rmet4nzkx]

The courts told me that there was a modification submitted, but that the judge did not accept it yet because my ex's lawyer didn't turn in the child support worksheet. I'm worried about one thing- I did sign the submitted modification...is there any way it could still be accepted? What do I need to do to make sure it won't be? Can I withdraw it or something like that? Also, how stupid would it be to just ask that she be returned before I go to the extent of filing contempt or child abduction? Probably really stupid, huh?
Oh, and my dad is going back to that county to pick up a copy of the effective order right now, so I should have it in about 3 hours....

Good that you will have a copy of the original order.
You can motion to dismiss the modification if you filed it in the first place because his default by not returning the financial forms. He can't do anything now and also envoke the SSCRA. He may not realize that the original order is in effect or at least that you don't know. There are several things you could do, but if you ask the child be returned after they have threatened you, the SM may disappear with the child, it is better to report the child abducted to the DA and they can assist with the orders to return the child. Also file your motions for contempt etc, they will be heard after dad returns.

 

[blueboy]

call your nearest base

Call your nearest military installation and ask for a JAG atty. mean while check this out, because he may be right.

http://www.eielson.af.mil/units/wing_staff/legal/sscra.htm

 

[MomTryin2Improv]

Good that you will have a copy of the original order.
You can motion to dismiss the modification if you filed it in the first place because his default by not returning the financial forms. He can't do anything now and also envoke the SSCRA. He may not realize that the original order is in effect or at least that you don't know. There are several things you could do, but if you ask the child be returned after they have threatened you, the SM may disappear with the child, it is better to report the child abducted to the DA and they can assist with the orders to return the child. Also file your motions for contempt etc, they will be heard after dad returns.

I have talked with a lawyer who tells me that because we have been following the new order, a judge will uphold it. Back to square 1.