commentator
Senior Member
I think the misprint in your post above, where you say "threes nothing I can do" is pretty appropriate. There are not three of you in this situation, this is between your boyfriend and his ex, about THEIR child. You and your fiance are not in a custody trial with his ex-whatever,
HE is. I am sure you want to help, but for heaven's sake, stay far out of this. An overly interested significant other at this point in the situation would do nothing to improve your boyfriend's chances of being perceived as the saner more mature party in the custody and "best interest of the child" issues. And being somebody who has already moved on and is creating serious jealousy and bad feelings and retaliation in the heart of the ex wife or girlfriend who is the other parent of his child is NOT good for him. YOU showing up anywhere with an attorney in his child custody issues is not what he needs.
Courts have seen all these scenarios before, and they'll be very conscious of your intervention and involvement, all the things you complain about which really, in the long run, might turn out to have very little to do with his child, and the shared custody of his child. Just say, for example, that you and he break up. What difference would it make, two years from now, that you and the ex had all this trouble, that she posted pics of you (by the way, nude pics aren't generally a good idea ever, delete immediately if made!) or that she told lies about you? You won't be around, child won't be aware of you, but the custody arrangements would have been determined with you seriously over involved anyway. They have to think of that.
HE is. I am sure you want to help, but for heaven's sake, stay far out of this. An overly interested significant other at this point in the situation would do nothing to improve your boyfriend's chances of being perceived as the saner more mature party in the custody and "best interest of the child" issues. And being somebody who has already moved on and is creating serious jealousy and bad feelings and retaliation in the heart of the ex wife or girlfriend who is the other parent of his child is NOT good for him. YOU showing up anywhere with an attorney in his child custody issues is not what he needs.
Courts have seen all these scenarios before, and they'll be very conscious of your intervention and involvement, all the things you complain about which really, in the long run, might turn out to have very little to do with his child, and the shared custody of his child. Just say, for example, that you and he break up. What difference would it make, two years from now, that you and the ex had all this trouble, that she posted pics of you (by the way, nude pics aren't generally a good idea ever, delete immediately if made!) or that she told lies about you? You won't be around, child won't be aware of you, but the custody arrangements would have been determined with you seriously over involved anyway. They have to think of that.
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