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Getting divorced in CA...Questions about recovering parental gift (house)

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recentlydivorcd

Junior Member
Again - they paid for a house that was to be titled in BOTH of your names. Now that things have gone south, it's suddenly not what they intended? I suspect their testimony is going to carry far less weight than the documentation that is already in place.

I ask again, and not to be snarky, were they fibbing then or now?
Sure, it's possible that their testimony will carry less weight than documentation that is already in place, which is why I'm trying to figure out what I can do to bolster my case.

Leaving the legality aside, don't you think that ethically, large parental gifts in a short marriage should be entitled to reimbursement?
Why would my ex-husband be entitled to 50% of the proceeds of the house in a 3.5 year marriage when 100% of the funds for the house came from my parents, who intended it as a gift for me?
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Sure, it's possible that their testimony will carry less weight than documentation that is already in place, which is why I'm trying to figure out what I can do to bolster my case.

Leaving the legality aside, don't you think that ethically, large parental gifts in a short marriage should be entitled to reimbursement?
Ethically, once a gift is given, why should anyone expect ANYTHING to be returned? It's a GIFT.
Why would my ex-husband be entitled to 50% of the proceeds of the house in a 3.5 year marriage when 100% of the funds for the house came from my parents
Because that's how the two of you set up ownership.

who intended it as a gift for me?
I'm STILL not convinced that's what was intended. I hear you saying it, but actions (at the time) speak volumes.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
First of all, I don't understand why this is important?
I'm not testifying when I'm posting to get some advice on an internet forum.
The POINT is that, at some point, your view of the nature of the matter has changed. 3.5 years ago, when you were both in love, you thought it was going to last forever. Your parents thought it was going to last forever. Your parents paid for the house as a gift to both of you. Now that things have gone sour, you want to somehow change the nature of the gift. Frankly, I find it a bit slimy.

Regarding my initial post, perhaps I was a bit imprecise in my language, but I think I have since clarified that my parents gave the funds as a gift for me, not for both of us.
Gift was coming from my father, and as such, wouldn't his testimony be the important evidence here, not my or my husband's opinion of the nature of it?
Just because your dad changed his mind about his intention after he gave the gift doesn't change the fact that it was a gift to both of you.
 

HRZ

Senior Member
Just out of curiosity...how big was the gift and was it for the whole house or just the down payment?

Unfortunately the steps you describe on paper make it rather clear the gift was into a joint account ...and was not clearly set off as separate . WHat you may have wished your parents would have done in hindsight is mere hindsight .

Did parents file a gift tax return.. wonder what that said?
 

recentlydivorcd

Junior Member
Just out of curiosity...how big was the gift and was it for the whole house or just the down payment?

Unfortunately the steps you describe on paper make it rather clear the gift was into a joint account ...and was not clearly set off as separate . WHat you may have wished your parents would have done in hindsight is mere hindsight .

Did parents file a gift tax return.. wonder what that said?
I need to talk to my parents about their tax return, but they're neither US citizens nor residents of the US.

The gift was made for the whole house, not just a down payment, and the amount was a lot (house is in Socal).
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
I need to talk to my parents about their tax return, but they're neither US citizens nor residents of the US.

The gift was made for the whole house, not just a down payment, and the amount was a lot (house is in Socal).
Oh boy, what a box of worms have been opened now.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
The POINT is that, at some point, your view of the nature of the matter has changed. 3.5 years ago, when you were both in love, you thought it was going to last forever. Your parents thought it was going to last forever. Your parents paid for the house as a gift to both of you. Now that things have gone sour, you want to somehow change the nature of the gift. Frankly, I find it a bit slimy.

Just because your dad changed his mind about his intention after he gave the gift doesn't change the fact that it was a gift to both of you.
I would find myself feeling slimy if I wanted to take 50% of the house when it was paid for by my ex's parents. It would go completely against all of my values.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
When I read the family code 2640, I was under the impression that my parents would be able to recover the funds because we could provide a) an oath that the gift was intended for me, b) trace the source of the money as my father's.
What else would I need to prove that the gift was not intended for both parties?
The gift was not given to YOU. The gift was given to you and your spouse JOINTLY. That is fact.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I'm sorry about the confusion from my earlier post.

I was not saying that the gift was purchased for both of us. My parents always intended it to be a gift for me and me only, but the direct deposit was made directly into a joint account, which was obviously a mistake.
Oh you are sorry you screwed up. But your parents did nothing to insure that it was gifted to you and you alone. So now you want to backtrack and have them commit perjury. They gifted a JOINT account. Hence it was a JOINT gift. Unless there is paperwork (contract) predating that. You haven't mentioned that so you would be committing a crime to suddenly say it exists now. And to have it be produced.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I don't think that she is trying to commit perjury. I can pretty much guarantee that her parents did not intend for the husband to be able to walk off with half of what they spent for the house.
Where is the contract signed prior to them gifting the money stating that it was ONLY a gift to the OP? Oh yeah. That doesn't exist. Therefore, OP (not sure it is a she) is trying to commit perjury or another crime.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
First of all, I don't understand why this is important?
I'm not testifying when I'm posting to get some advice on an internet forum.

Regarding my initial post, perhaps I was a bit imprecise in my language, but I think I have since clarified that my parents gave the funds as a gift for me, not for both of us.
Gift was coming from my father, and as such, wouldn't his testimony be the important evidence here, not my or my husband's opinion of the nature of it?
Wrong. You have no proof that it was a gift to YOU and not both you and your spouse. Your father's testimony is BIASED. The house was titled in both spouses' names and there is no writing from prior to the purchase of the house acknowledged by both you and your STBX to state it was gifted only to you. Hence you and your father are big fat liars.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Sure, it's possible that their testimony will carry less weight than documentation that is already in place, which is why I'm trying to figure out what I can do to bolster my case.

Leaving the legality aside, don't you think that ethically, large parental gifts in a short marriage should be entitled to reimbursement?
Why would my ex-husband be entitled to 50% of the proceeds of the house in a 3.5 year marriage when 100% of the funds for the house came from my parents, who intended it as a gift for me?
Parol evidence law for one. Statute of frauds for another.

The fact that you and your parents are lying for a third. I can continue. If your parents intended a real estate gift to be for you, they should have put that in writing. They didn't. Instead the house is deeded to both you and your spouse.
 

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