Granddaughter is being beaten by mother's boyfriend

[JKBee]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

My daughter in law left my son about three months or so ago. She moved in with her boyfriend, and they are living with his parents. The court requires the mother to have the child for two days a week. When she has come back she complains about unspecified owwies, and has been taken to the doctor each time afterwards.

She is eight years old and the doctor finally got her, on the third visit, to break down and say that her mother's boyfriend was beating her all the time and her mother would just tell her to "run and hide". She said she was so sore she could barely move, yet alone run.

She admitted the boyfriend is beating her and if she tells anyone, he will kick her mommy out and she will have no place to live. The pediatrician said she was reporting this immediately to CPS. In her reports,however, she wrote such a soft report that she never even wrote a record of the owwies or the boyfriends beatings. Because of this incompetent doctor, who is no longer with this clinic, CPS has refused to do anything. My son filed a report with the county sheriff's department, and they have done nothing. We have gone to mental health departments asking for help. Everyone just keeps saying they aren't qualified to interview a minor, and no one is doing anything.

There is another doctor visit scheduled next week and we will have to see where that goes. The child is very articulate and has never changed her story of horror. We were told by the sheriff's department not to discuss this futher with her, so we haven't. Counseling is so backed up it is two to three months before we can get her professional help.

My son's lawyer says he can't do anything until he has a concrete interview that he can take into court.

At this point we have even gone to our state senator. What he will do I do not know, as he needs written permission to intervene, which is currently in the mail for him so he can look into this.

The mother has not asked for visitation for the last three weeks, but today we got papers that state that she wants total custody of this child. (That is for another day in court, which is a month and a half away, and is not the issue here, yet, at least.) If she does ask for visitation, we have been told we have to grant it or be held in contempt of court.

Does anyone have any ideas for anything that we might have overlooked to get this little girl interviewed by someone who is capable of coming into court to get a court order to protect this child?

 

[Proserpina]

Who was present when daughter was telling the pediatrician what was going on?

Do you actually know what the pediatrician's report contained?

Are they still married?

 

[JKBee]

My son was present, but the doctor called me while they were in the examining room to talk to me personally since I am the transporting party.

And yes, we do have copies of all the reports this doctor wrote, so we know exactly what they said.

 

[JKBee]

Sorry, I am almost totally computer illiterate, but I am trying.

Yes, they are still married. The divorce is scheduled for Dec.

Also, we are asking for a guardian ad litum. But this won't help in the immediate future. Like this weekend if she insists on getting the kids again.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

My daughter in law left my son about three months or so ago. She moved in with her boyfriend, and they are living with his parents. The court requires the mother to have the child for two days a week. When she has come back she complains about unspecified owwies, and has been taken to the doctor each time afterwards.

She is eight years old and the doctor finally got her, on the third visit, to break down and say that her mother's boyfriend was beating her all the time and her mother would just tell her to "run and hide". She said she was so sore she could barely move, yet alone run.

She admitted the boyfriend is beating her and if she tells anyone, he will kick her mommy out and she will have no place to live. The pediatrician said she was reporting this immediately to CPS. In her reports,however, she wrote such a soft report that she never even wrote a record of the owwies or the boyfriends beatings. Because of this incompetent doctor, who is no longer with this clinic, CPS has refused to do anything. My son filed a report with the county sheriff's department, and they have done nothing. We have gone to mental health departments asking for help. Everyone just keeps saying they aren't qualified to interview a minor, and no one is doing anything.

There is another doctor visit scheduled next week and we will have to see where that goes. The child is very articulate and has never changed her story of horror. We were told by the sheriff's department not to discuss this futher with her, so we haven't. Counseling is so backed up it is two to three months before we can get her professional help.

My son's lawyer says he can't do anything until he has a concrete interview that he can take into court.

At this point we have even gone to our state senator. What he will do I do not know, as he needs written permission to intervene, which is currently in the mail for him so he can look into this.

The mother has not asked for visitation for the last three weeks, but today we got papers that state that she wants total custody of this child. (That is for another day in court, which is a month and a half away, and is not the issue here, yet, at least.) If she does ask for visitation, we have been told we have to grant it or be held in contempt of court.

Does anyone have any ideas for anything that we might have overlooked to get this little girl interviewed by someone who is capable of coming into court to get a court order to protect this child?

When it comes to abuse of a child the most important evidence is physical evidence.

So far, you haven't mentioned anything that is physical evidence. Beatings leave physcial evidence.

What physcial evidence is present?

 

[JKBee]

This is one of the problems. He hits her open handed after doing what he calls, "a double wind up whammy" where he circles his arm around in the air twice to get momentum. It causes extreme soreness but no bruising. I am sure there are red marks, but they are gone by the time we get her back.

There was one bruise that was about 8 " long on the front of her leg. It was just put down as "normal childhood bruising."

My son also got pictures of the baby's cheek which had the imprint of two fingers on it.

He is smart enough to know the interrogators way of old of hitting but not bruising.

If it were another child, I would say she is making this up, but she is not one to lie and she is too graphic in her details to believe this is anything from a child's imagination.

Last time I picked her up she was so sore I had to help her into her car seat. That was before we learned about the abuse, or she would have immediately been taken to emmergency!

 

[Proserpina]

This is one of the problems. He hits her open handed after doing what he calls, "a double wind up whammy" where he circles his arm around in the air twice to get momentum. It causes extreme soreness but no bruising. I am sure there are red marks, but they are gone by the time we get her back.

There was one bruise that was about 8 " long on the front of her leg. It was just put down as "normal childhood bruising."

My son also got pictures of the baby's cheek which had the imprint of two fingers on it.

Can you prove the marks were made by a particular person?

He is smart enough to know the interrogators way of old of hitting but not bruising. If it were another child, I would say she is making this up, but she is not one to lie and she is too graphic in her details to believe this is anything from a child's imagination.

Last time I picked her up she was so sore I had to help her into her car seat. That was before we learned about the abuse, or she would have immediately been taken to emmergency!

What did the pediatrician's report actually say?

Absent physical evidence there's not much that your son can do.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

She was so sore she couldnt sit down but there was no bruise?

 

[Proserpina]

She was so sore she couldnt sit down but there was no bruise?

I didn't even catch that...

 

[JKBee]

No,there was no bruising. The sheriff's deputy did explain how that is possible. I hadn't thought it was myself, but it has to do with the way the hand hits the child. I also talked to a couple of other people who are in the military and they explained it a little differently, but the same results.

The only one that can do something about this is the child herself. She has the right to be heard by someone who is a "specialist" in child interviewing, which everyone else says they are not. It is HER story that needs to be listened to, and I would love to find that doctor and get her to explain why she told me under no circumstances to take the children to the mother again and then wrote that she was "slightly concerned" with their safety in her CPS report.

What I haven't said is that this kid is starved by the mother because the boyfriend refuses to let her feed her while she is there. If she gets so much as a soda and an ice cream cone all day, it is a good day for her. She always has to go to bed hungry and just gets beaten if she asks for food. This is from her, but graphic enough and always consistent Exactly what she was fed, even if asked again three weeks later by the doctor. The doctor also didn't put any of this in her report.

What I am asking for here is if anyone has any ideas how to get this investigation going before the kid comes home in a body bag?

 

[Proserpina]

What I haven't said is that this kid is starved by the mother because the boyfriend refuses to let her feed her while she is there. If she gets so much as a soda and an ice cream cone all day, it is a good day for her. She always has to go to bed hungry and just gets beaten if she asks for food.

Sigh....and yet you didn't think this was important enough to mention before?

You've lost some credibility OP. Seriously, all of this is going on and you omitted this very serious matter?

 

[JKBee]

I didn't mention it because it pertains to negligence of the mother, not beating by the boyfriend.

Our lawyer says they are two separate issues.

And no, I don't understand any of these fine points of the law.

The lawyers says this is child neglect from the mother for not feeding her. I am trying to deal with just the one issue of the boyfriend. Maybe I should have combined the issues. This has just been so frustrating!

If there had been bruising, this would be an easier case.

And there are pictures of bruises on the baby, which were showed to the doctor but also not documented.

The only bruises on the eight year old were on her legs, which we have pictures of, but were written off as just normal childhood bruising.

I may be losing credibility, but I have medical records and pages and pages of phone call numbers I have called trying to get someone to talk to the CHILD! She is the only one who can state what has happened to her!

 

[Ohiogal]

Why do YOU have a lawyer in your son's divorce? That is giong to prove difficult. Does YOUR son really want to custody or are you wanting custody and using your son as a method to get it?

If there is no bruising then that is why CPS cannot do anything. There is NO PROOF.

 

[JKBee]

I term him "my" lawyer because I pay all the bills at this point.

I DO NOT WANT CUSTODY. My son does.

I went through my own battles and only trying to do this on my granddaughter's behalf.

Have you ever held a crying child in your arms and try to comfort that child?

For too many years I had to comfort foster children after seeing the abuse they had to go through. And now my granddaughter is having to go through this.

I am asking for some CONSTRUCTIVE ideas of how to get this child interviewed. Everyone I have contacted is backed up for two to three months. If we, or MY SON can get such an interview done that will document the abuse, then MY SON'S lawyer will go into court with a 24 hour emergency request for child visitation revocation.

It ALL depends on a qualified person talking to her. Physical abuse is not required to be showed in bruises if the child is interviewed and can give a very good description of the abuse and the other events. But it has to be done by a QUALIFIED CHILD EXPERT. DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY IDEAS HOW TO FIND ONE? IMMEDIATELY!

If not, then you are no help and why are you bothering to even comment?





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[Ohiogal]

I have several ideas and several places that qualified people can be found. However, I don't like your attitude.