Health concerns while visiting

[maramirez226]

What is the name of your state? CA

Can I take my daughter to a doctor/specialist/social worker while she is visiting me in California? She lives in MT with her mother and she takes over 72 MG of ADHD medication and she is only 11 years old. This dosage is considered high for an adult. The mother suffers from her own mental disorders so I think she only medicates her to calm her down so that she doesn't have to deal with her own anxiety issues. I am concerned for my daughters well being and that she will become addicted to these meds.

 

[stealth2]

What does your daughter's doctor (the one prescribing these meds) say when you speak with him/her?

 

[maramirez226]

When I spoke to him he said that I am right that she takes a much higher dosage than most kids. However based off the assessment that the mom(mom is the school nurse at daughters school) did and the teacher(mom is coworker of this teacher) did he said he felt it necessary. Based on the Vanderbilt information from mom and his teacher, they felt that the therapeutic effects were wearing off in the last morning/early afternoon. He discussed options, including continuing with but increasing methylphenidate or transitioning to another medication such as Vyvanse or Adderall(she already took this), ultimately deciding to remain with a medication that seems to have been well-tolerated and effective based off moms opinion but may benefit from dose and frequency adjustment. Upward titration of his pharmacotherapy is related to a variety of factors, not the least of which is her relatively rapid growth as she experiences puberty. In adolescence, dose escalation is particularly supposedly common but adjusted down which I dont believe but Im not a doctor or an attorney. The meds were never this high up until the court ordered counseling started.

 

[stealth2]

So the doctor agreed with the meds?

 

[maramirez226]

The doctor prescribed the meds so ultimately yes he has to agree to them in order for the prescription to occur. He was very clear that he prescribed the meds on the advice of his mother whom requested his dosage to be increased twice. He asked her why and he said okay. The mother failed to mention however that she is bipolar therefore leaving out the fact that the severity of my daughter's anxiety can perhaps be a little exaggerated by someone with bipolar disorder versus someone who is mentally healthy.

 

[LdiJ]

The doctor prescribed the meds so ultimately yes he has to agree to them in order for the prescription to occur. He was very clear that he prescribed the meds on the advice of his mother whom requested his dosage to be increased twice. He asked her why and he said okay. The mother failed to mention however that she is bipolar therefore leaving out the fact that the severity of my daughter's anxiety can perhaps be a little exaggerated by someone with bipolar disorder versus someone who is mentally healthy.

What do you want to accomplish?

 

[maramirez226]

Ultimately get her dosage reduced and figure out alternative methods for her treatment. Realistically the mother wont agree to that and on more than one occasion has told me her goal is for me never to see my daughter again so while I'd hate to say this but someone like that shouldn't be raising a kid and despite the abuse not being physical there is major emotional damage occurring here. I'd like for her mother to cooperate but.i know that wont happen so at the end of it all I'd like my daughter to live with me. I've considered calling social services on her mother. Abuse is abuse. I only get to see my daughter once a year for 4 weeks in the summer. Living in two different states makes the legal aspect much more complex

 

[Taxing Matters]

What is the name of your state? CA

Can I take my daughter to a doctor/specialist/social worker while she is visiting me in California? She lives in MT with her mother and she takes over 72 MG of ADHD medication and she is only 11 years old. This dosage is considered high for an adult. The mother suffers from her own mental disorders so I think she only medicates her to calm her down so that she doesn't have to deal with her own anxiety issues. I am concerned for my daughters well being and that she will become addicted to these meds.

What does the custody order in your case say about medical decisions? And in what state's courts entered those orders?

 

[maramirez226]

It doesnt say anything about medical decisions. It just says we both have should have access to all medical records and should share information with each other regarding medical related things while with either parent. These orders were entered in Montana.

 

[LdiJ]

Ultimately get her dosage reduced and figure out alternative methods for her treatment. Realistically the mother wont agree to that and on more than one occasion has told me her goal is for me never to see my daughter again so while I'd hate to say this but someone like that shouldn't be raising a kid and despite the abuse not being physical there is major emotional damage occurring here. I'd like for her mother to cooperate but.i know that wont happen so at the end of it all I'd like my daughter to live with me. I've considered calling social services on her mother. Abuse is abuse. I only get to see my daughter once a year for 4 weeks in the summer. Living in two different states makes the legal aspect much more complex

You are talking about a situation where you only see the child for 4 weeks a year. Your goal of wanting to reduce the child's meds and/or finding alternative treatment is not really very realistic when you only see her 4 weeks a year and therefore cannot make realistic claims about her medical care.

Now, if you moved to your child's state/community and got a parenting schedule that was reflective of that then you would have some room to maneuver.

 

[maramirez226]

It use to be 50/50. She has done things like this to ultimately reduce it to what it is now. So this is her last ploy to get it down to nothing. We all use to live in California. She is the one that made Montana the home state. Moving back to Montana was an option up until custody was reduced to 4 weeks. After it changed to 4 weeks. She took me to court as soon as they returned, took them to a counselor so they can tell him how they spent their summers and said that the children were afraid of me now because I took them to an amusement park with roller coasters and therefore the judge decided that he would only allow them to return once counseling was ordered to confirm whether or not they were truly afraid.

You are talking about a situation where you only see the child for 4 weeks a year. Your goal of wanting to reduce the child's meds and/or finding alternative treatment is not really very realistic when you only see her 4 weeks a year and therefore cannot make realistic claims about her medical care.

Now, if you moved to your child's state/community and got a parenting schedule that was reflective of that then you would have some room to maneuver.

I lost my room to maneuver which is why I live in California not the other way around. I moved to Montana with my family. She had an affair with a friend of mine and after that her she gradually lied her way through the system which essentially drove me out of the state. I left in order to make more money so that I can comply with the $2500 emergency family support order that was enforced. Once she started getting her money she invested all that into the same attorney that argued the emergency order. I got kicked out of my own house and had my kids ripped away from me on the account that she was entitled to the marital home. It's a very long story but at this point I'm trying to figure out how to avoid making a very bad situation worse. Regardless of the 4 weeks I no longer have I know enough of the 9 years I single handedly raised our daughter because her bipolar disorder wouldn't for her to cope with her responsibilities of being a parent. I know eno6about our child from these 9 years that her ADHD was manageable without this high dosage of medication. She never needed meds at home or on the weekends and it was simply required to allow her teachers to deal with it without requiring that they put her in a home study program. Essentially now her mom is following suit because shes learning what it is to deal with a child that she disregarded the majority of her life.

 

[t74]

I believe you have a valid concern about the meds. HOWEVER, you see the child so infrequently that you must trust the physician she is seeing to recommend the proper dosage. I hope this physician is a developmental pediatric specialist or pediatric psychiatrist. If not, request that she be referred to a specialist. At that age, my child saw the regular ped and the developmental ped offset by 6 months so there was rregular monitoring. Also see what services are available at the school for ADHD students.

I have a child (now an adult) who is severely ADHD, bipolar, LD and has a sleep disorder. What gave us the best insight into his problems was a neuro-psyc exam. Only a few psychologists in my city will test children, and I do not know the best age since this was done well after the best age for school appropriate data.

Good luck!

 

[maramirez226]

You are talking about a situation where you only see the child for 4 weeks a year. Your goal of wanting to reduce the child's meds and/or finding alternative treatment is not really very realistic when you only see her 4 weeks a year and therefore cannot make realistic claims about her medical care.

Now, if you moved to your child's state/community and got a parenting schedule that was reflective of that then you would have some room to maneuver.

I lost my room to maneuver which is why I live in California not the other way around. I moved to Montana with my family. She had an affair with a friend of mine and after that her she gradually lied her way through the system which essentially drove me out of the state. I left in order to make more money so that I can comply with the $2500 emergency family support order that was enforced. Once she started getting her money she invested all that into the same attorney that argued the emergency order. I got kicked out of my own house and had my kids ripped away from me.

I believe you have a valid concern about the meds. HOWEVER, you see the child so infrequently that you must trust the physician she is seeing to recommend the proper dosage. I hope this physician is a developmental pediatric specialist or pediatric psychiatrist. If not, request that she be referred to a specialist. At that age, my child saw the regular ped and the developmental ped offset by 6 months so there was rregular monitoring. Also see what services are available at the school for ADHD students.

I have a child (now an adult) who is severely ADHD, bipolar, LD and has a sleep disorder. What gave us the best insight into his problems was a neuro-psyc exam. Only a few psychologists in my city will test children, and I do not know the best age since this was done well after the best age for school appropriate data.

Good luck!

Thank you. That's good advice. She doesnt see one just a regular general pediatrician that sees our son as well at the same time.The school doesnt have programs because the school health program is ran by the nurse who doesnt offer these programs. The school nurse is also my ex wife, the mother of the child in question.

 

[t74]

I believe your child would be better served by seeing a specialist in ADHD. My luck with general pediatricians was very bad. In my experience, a developmental exam was very different from an annual checkup.

I am referring to school based testing for a hidden LD. Poor behavior and academic performance in school may be a result of other than ADHD. This is not done by a nurse.

Consider having her seen by a specialist during your visitation. It should be covered by your child's health insurance but check because they are expensive. See what is required for a referral for academic testing by the special education program in your child's school district. Please do not be afraid of a special ed referral. A different one of my children who now has a PhD was in special education for speech when in elementary school.

 

[maramirez226]

I believe your child would be better served by seeing a specialist in ADHD. My luck with general pediatricians was very bad. In my experience, a developmental exam was very different from an annual checkup.

I am referring to school based testing for a hidden LD. Poor behavior and academic performance in school may be a result of other than ADHD. This is not done by a nurse.

Consider having her seen by a specialist during your visitation. It should be covered by your child's health insurance but check because they are expensive. See what is required for a referral for academic testing by the special education program in your child's school district. Please do not be afraid of a special ed referral. A different one of my children who now has a PhD was in special education for speech when in elementary school.

She is a straight A student. She was even before the medication. My insurance covers this specialist but she refuses to take him to one. The only problem that she sees with her behavior is her hypertension. Is specialist is probably the best option if I look at it from your perspective. My whole question really was if it's illegal for me to take her to a specialist while she is visiting me. This is the only way I can think of getting a second opinion