Some Random Guy said:
Do we contact the web-host who they have their site through? Which we did, heard nothing, is the ISP the internet service they are using to get on the net? And how do you find that out? Thanks
Yes, you want to contact the company hosting their web site. Since they have chosen to not respond to you, I would suggest a formal letter on the stationary of a local law firm indicating to them that they, by their inaction after notification, are participating this illegal activity and copyright infringement. If they continue to host the site they will be added as defendants in the civil suits against the brothers.
The general rule for an ISP is that they are immune from liability for vicarious or contributory copyright infringement for hosting infringing materials unless they are "noticed" that they are hosting infringing materials, and then do nothing. However, simply sending them a letter or email or calling them is insufficient to provide notice -- you must follow precisely the steps in 17 USC 512(c):
http://www.copyright.gov/title17/92chap5.html#512 -- if you don't, the ISP has not been legally "noticed," and they don't have to do anything. Only after they have been legally noticed do they have liability if they fail to act on the notice.
However, that said, it's not clear that you really have a case for copyright infringement anyway. As far as the videos are concerned, if the brothers took the videos, they own the copyright in the videos. It is very likely that them showing the videos is an invasion of privacy, and they could probably be sued for that, but it is not copyright infringement.
In addition, their telling of your mom's story is also not copyright infringement, as long as they stick to the "facts." If you've editorialized, or otherwise used creativity in your storytelling, then that would be protected, and you could perhaps find that they are infringing on your copyright. But if all they are doing is telling the factual story, or the factual story with THEIR creative spin, well, that's not copyright infringement. You cannot copyright facts. I don't mean to be harsh, but I could get a copy of your book, read it, and write my own bio of your mom based on what I read, and it wouldn't be infringement as long as I stuck to the facts, and put things in my own words.
And finally, them writing or posting about the book itself is also unlikely to be illegal. There are pretty high levels of protection for critical speech, and criticism of a work is almost always found to be a fair use" of the work. Unless the postings rise to the level of libel, it is unlikely that you can keep them from criticizing your book.
Now, all that said, it doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to get them shut down in any way you can -- who knows, if you are persistent enough, maybe they'll just give up -- but it doesn't sound like, from what you've written, that you have much of a cause of action under copyright law. It sounds like you might very well have a good case for invasion of privacy, and maybe even defamation, but not copyright infringement.
Different facts might change that analysis, but based on what you've posted, that's my read.