As stealth2 already said so what? What does it cost you to keep sending him the updates?When he does actually ask about the girls, I always send him answers such as what they did that day, what they are doing right then, or for my youngest milestones that she is doing. I will tell him cute things that they say or do, here and there it might even be a picture of something they made or did, or them being cute. I will tell him things such as my 3 year old is starting to say new things, I try to keep him updated as far as clothing, diaper sizes, their daily pattern with naps or play so that he can feel like he knows more about them and their lives, their personalities, etc.
However, when I have done all of this in the past, I get no response regarding anything about the kids. All I get back are rude, derogatory comments towards me. Which leads me to where we are at today.
This is an example:
Me: The girls had a great day. She enjoyed doing stickers with me, we went to the park and ate lunch and Q didn't have a nap today so she is bed earlier tonight. She picked up a piece of pizza today and said yummy for the first time. It was cute.
That's it. Done. A few minutes later I will get a message such as:
Him: Are you going to tell me why you don't answer anything I ask?
Took three hours for a response. How pathetic.
Well guess you are too busy up the ass of some trash again.
These are typical responses to me giving him information. He just ignores everything I say like it wasn't even sent, asks why I won't talk about personal things that he wants to ask me instead of things regarding the kids, and if I don't jump to and be on my phone twenty four seven, not even five minutes go by before I get a berating comment about being somewhere else, not paying attention, refusing him information, denying him access, etc. I usually answer or send these messages when I see them. I am not a person that is attached to my phone as some are. Hope this may help.
If contact is by phone, email or text, you simply reply your only going to discuss things that concern the children. You keep saying that, typing that everytime he goes off topic. I've witnessed just about the worst by an ex to the other parent, however if you just simply reply your only going to discuss things that concern the children, it eventually gets through to the worst of them. You still might have to do this all over again every couple of months, but it does work. You ignore the questions in the email that are about you, if that is all that is in the email, simply reply back, your only going to discuss things that concern the children. Works on the phone to, sometimes they will get cussing you out and will have to say, I am going to only discuss the children, we need to get back to that, if he won't, you simply say that your going to hang up and he can call you back when he is ready to discuss the children. If you do this and have to hang up and he calls you back cussing you out, you say it again and hang up. At that point you can then let his calls go to voice mail, wait till some time has passed and try taking one later when he calls or address the issue you need to speak with him on the children in an email.
You can save your emails, texts and voice mail messages. You picked the guy to have children with, now your stuck with that guy, and there is nothing anyone here can tell you to change that. Your stuck dealing with him till those kids are grown, so make it less miserable for yourself, understanding that you will have to put in more effort and find ways to work around him.