In desperate need of advice....

[TabbyJane]

It was a very good suggestion that I'll look into in the morning. I'm not hung up on legal titles. Son won't stop calling me "mama". The important thing is that his life maintains as much normalcy as possible, given the circumstances. I have kept the same haircut for roughly 8 years because he doesn't handle change, and is afraid he won't "rekanize" me if my hair is different.

There were two payments, around nine years ago. Most of the amount went to DFCS b/c they were collecting based on the assistance I got while in college. The total (if my memory is even remotely close) was $200.

I like the suggestion Prose gave you. If you are fine with this, you can voluntarily relinguish your rights to your parents. And they can sue your ex in order to adopt your son. If he doesn't respond then he could possibly have his rights terminated for abandonment. How long since he has paid support however?
That would make YOU your child's sister until**************....

But your ex would not be able to get custody of him.

 

[TabbyJane]

It could have been worse. You could have been receiving a verbal smackdown intended for someone else.

Ummm... yeah I was confused. I may have had wine but not THAT much.

 

[Ohiogal]

It could have been worse. You could have been receiving a verbal smackdown intended for someone else.

Agreed and I get enough attempts at a verbal smackdown directed at me that I don't need to get anyone else's. I wish you luck.

 

[Proserpina]

Agreed and I get enough attempts at a verbal smackdown directed at me that I don't need to get anyone else's. I wish you luck.

Ditto and ditto

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks for the support. No, there's no husband, or boyfriend for that matter. Most of my time was spent taking care of my guy and (until about six months ago) working. Barely had time to breath, let alone have a social life. My family (parents and brother) have helped so much. Because of my dad and brother, my son didn't lack a strong male role model.

I think that you and your parents should consult an adoption attorney and see if its possible for your parents to adopt your child now, while you are still here and can agree.

You certainly have a basis to claim that his father abandoned him, and that may allow an adoption to take place now. Do consult an adoption attorney as soon as possible.

 

[TabbyJane]

Thanks for your help. I (read: my entire family) want to pool enough $ for an attorney, but medical bills have really piled up. We are working on it, though. I don't know why I didn't think of adoption. It should have occurred to me. My cousin gave her son up for adoption. She had to post a newspaper notice for a certain number of weeks in county he was residing in.

Makes total sense and I could have saved myself a lot of sleepless nights had I thought this through a little better.

I think that you and your parents should consult an adoption attorney and see if its possible for your parents to adopt your child now, while you are still here and can agree.

You certainly have a basis to claim that his father abandoned him, and that may allow an adoption to take place now. Do consult an adoption attorney as soon as possible.

 

[Joel needs help]

How many 13-year-old boys still want to hug their moms in public?

ME!!!! although i am way older than 13
You are a great mom and are doing wonderful things. It sounds like you have a great head on your shoulders!

 

[TabbyJane]

And, I just caught my typo....barely had time to *breathe* not "breath".

 

[TabbyJane]

OhioGAL - Just wanted to mention how much I love your signature. Reminds me of two of my mom's old sayings:

"God gives us younguns when they're babies so you'll love them enough to put up with them as teenagers."

and

"Raising your kids right is a lot cheaper than paying for a nursing home later."

 

[TabbyJane]

Careful, now. Don't make me all weepy and blubbery.

ME!!!! although i am way older than 13
You are a great mom and are doing wonderful things. It sounds like you have a great head on your shoulders!

 

[Proserpina]

OhioGAL - Just wanted to mention how much I love your signature. Reminds me of two of my mom's old sayings:

"God gives us younguns when they're babies so you'll love them enough to put up with them as teenagers."

and

"Raising your kids right is a lot cheaper than paying for a nursing home later."

Le sigh. Really.