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Is it legal for a bar to do this?

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LdiJ

Senior Member
In the same circumstances, L, would you prefer your daughter to clean the bar or go to jail?
No, so I would probably insist on going with her and supervising...or I would try to negotiate a different solution with the bar owner.
 

quincy

Senior Member
No, so I would probably insist on going with her and supervising...or I would try to negotiate a different solution with the bar owner.
There is nothing wrong with trying to negotiate a different solution with the bar owner - but that is assuming you, as parent, were informed by the bar or your daughter of your daughter’s illegal presence in the bar, her illegal drinking and her theft of alcohol.

I imagine that the bar owner, if trying to protect his own interests, would not publicize his offer to the teens to the parents of the teens and, likewise, the teens probably would prefer their parents were not informed.

Once the parents become involved, it probably would not be long before the police and attorneys become involved. At that point, criminal charges may result.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
There is nothing wrong with trying to negotiate a different solution with the bar owner - but that is assuming you, as parent, were informed by the bar or your daughter of your daughter’s illegal presence in the bar, her illegal drinking and her theft of alcohol.

I imagine that the bar owner, if trying to protect his own interests, would not publicize his offer to the teens to the parents of the teens and, likewise, the teens probably would prefer their parents were not informed.

Once the parents become involved, it probably would not be long before the police and attorneys become involved. At that point, criminal charges may result.
The children were adults at the age of 18 and therefore they could negotiate their own positions. Any parent would be out of line.
 

quincy

Senior Member
The children were adults at the age of 18 and therefore they could negotiate their own positions. Any parent would be out of line.
Oh. I agree completely.

I also think it unlikely that the teens would tell their parents about their illegal acts if they could avoid doing so.

Any agreement was more likely between just the bar and the teens.
 

quincy

Senior Member
LOL My younger would!
You have good relationships with your kids.

I think many teens might try to hide from their parents any illegal acts they committed - unless or until they needed monetary or legal help or figured in the near future they would need monetary or legal help.

It depends on the kid. And the parents of the kid.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
You have good relationships with your kids.

I think many teens might try to hide from their parents any illegal acts they committed - unless or until they needed monetary or legal help or figured in the near future they would need monetary or legal help.

It depends on the kid. And the parents of the kid.
The key to having a good relationship is to let them know at a VERY young age that Mom has eyes on the back of her head...any never do anything to make them doubt that it's true.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
The key to having a good relationship is to let them know at a VERY young age that Mom has eyes on the back of her head...any never do anything to make them doubt that it's true.
I dunno. Both of mine have always known that there is absolutely nothing they can't bring to me (sometimes to my chagrin...). And while I may not let them off the hook, I will help them navigate through the rapids. (I know. Mixed metaphors.)


ETA: In the OP's situation, my kids could have expected a lot of yelling, slamming of cabinets, etc. Then a deep breath and "Okay. What you did was stupid. You know that. Both going to the bar AND stealing the booze. And WhoTF was driving???" Some more ranting, slamming of cabinets. "Okay. No, really. Now what. Did they call the cops? No? Okay. First thing we do is go down to the bar, you and me. No, your friends have their own parents. " And proceed from there. OL And.... the consequences from the bar wouldn't be the end of it. Not by a far shot. And yes - as long as they were under my roof, they could follow my rules. (LOL at 25+ and 27, they still know when they are home - my rules.)
 
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