concerned1970
Junior Member
GEORGIA
*I need to speak to someone about a court order issued on January 13th, 2012 that will put my children in danger. *As such, my urgent question is whether there is ever a good defense for contempt actions such as denying visitation when you are concerned for the welfare of you children? **
Here is is a brief summary of a complicated situation. *I will first address the hearing that granted the temporary order of 50/50 visitation on January 13th, 2012. *As of yet, I have not received an official court order.
Mt ex has an extended TPO against him to protect me, and until The hearing on January 13th, 2012, the TPO also protected my children. * I have fired my attorney for, by his admission, not returning phone calls, and for not preparing for or preventing an emergency hearing called my ex's attorney. * My previous attorney, admitted his lack of preparation outside the hearing to my father and a family friend.
The emergency hearing was called because, as a recovering alcoholic, I was falsely accused of abusing mind altering drugs while caring for my children. *The drugs in question were prescribed by an ER doctor who saw me when I fractured my tailbone on December 27th, 2011. *While in the ER, my Dr prescribed me Lortab. * Notably, the day I fell, I blacked out from the pain. *The pain was worse than labor. *I needed something to relieve the pain. *I have never abused pills, and have been prescribed stronger pain medications without abusing them post pregnancy. *I will admit to being a classic alchoholic, but besides caffeine, and the occasional chocolate indulgence, alchohol is my ONLY drug of choice. **
*Upon direction from my doctor, I took Lortab, as prescribed. *During the time I took the Lortab, I was staying with my parents in Greenville, SC. *This was during winter break and there were 4 capable, loving adults, in addition to myself caring for the children. *In fact they were spoiled with love and attention during this time. * Plus, I was still capable of effectively parenting my children verbally, while immobile. *I started taking Tylenol and a non-narcotic anti-inflamatory after a little over a week and returned to GA, assisted by my boyfriend and father, to make sure Natalia was adjusted and prepared to return to school.** In summary, the call for the hearing was frivolous and should have never occurred. * *Judge Lane was noticeably irritated and exclaimed "WHY ARE WE HERE? * THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY!"
*NOTE: (I began my AA recovery when I lived in NYC in 1995, but relapsed for a short period of time, after being sober since 95, *I had a brief relapse before I left my abusive husband in 2010. *He told me that I was not a bitch anymore when I drank and I believed him - pathetic but true. *Since January of 2011, I have been back in AA WITH NO DESIRE to return to drinking).*
Clearly, the hearing was a desperate and transparent (to everyone except My counsel, who was not paying attention) attempt to achieve a 50/50 visitation for my ex. *The judge did not have all the details, was noticeably confused, and irritated. It didn't help that the report from the psychologist who did the forensic evaluation, let's just call her Sally, on my daughter for sexual abuse evaluated my daughter for sexual abuse, had troublesome inconsistencies and was not admitted to the court. * Sally was not summoned to appear by either counsel. *Medlin's report confirmed my ex rubbed in my daughter's vaginal area in and out of the tub on more than one occasion with his hands, not a towel or washcloth. *Yet, in the report, my husband denied ever bathing her. *Further, Sally previously stated that she would would not complete the report without a final interview with my daughter, which never occurred.*
Stepping back in time to clarify how we got to this point, Sally sent the report to My attny minutes before we left for our 60 day status conference on November 30th, 2011. He*did not have to provide it to opposing counsel, which I later learned. *He did, without fully evaluating or considering strategy,*shooting from the hip and unprepared. *Meanwhile Sally's work was incomplete at best.* Sally initially, after performing one interview with Natalia, wrote a note to the court for a TPO hearing in October 2011 and notified DFACS that My exshould not have access to the children. *The TPO against Josh to protect the children and me was extended. **
Sally's final report, grossly differing from her initial recommendation to withhold visitation, was based on a single interview with my ex. *The interview with my ex was riddled with lies and embellishments and "mistruths" I can prove. * The report concluded*Josh should have visitation (not specifying overnight or not) because although he did touch her in an appropriate way, *it wasn't sexual in nature. *
*I think, REALLY????? *This doctor went to Harvard to validate spouting such drivel? *I could do better than that without a degree. * Where was her integrity, professional responsibility, education, and common sense?
The Judge understood that I gave 5 days of unsupervised visitation to the children, based on Kupferman telling me that I would absolutely lose my children if I didn't give visitation. *After the hearing, the TPO REMAINED IN PLACE AND THERE WAS NO CUSTODY ORDER. * *My attnygave me unclear advice on how to move forward but finally told me that I was withholding the children and would lose custody if I didn't give Josh continued access to the children against every instinct I had before the status conference scheduled for January 30th, 2012. *So, I allowed My ex Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas with his family. * *Against my request, My ex promised a visit after my daughter's*January 6th birthday to receive gifts and go horseback riding. * In an effort to follow legal counsel, and keeping in mind that My ex had threatened to keep(steal)the kids if I didn't meet his demands, I offered him a weekend to celebrate her birthday.
*During the emergency hearing on January 13 th*The judge*admonished me for not protecting my children from Mr Meeks if I felt they were unsafe, keeping them from him after my attorney told me I have no choice but to let them see him. *After closing arguments, the judge admonished me and she said I should have ignored my attorney, and withheld the children from the father. * Please keep in mind that I have a recorded threat from My ex on the day after Christmas to not return the kids. *On multiple occasions, he threatened to kill me if I took his kids away from him "like his ****ing **** of a mother who took him from his his father". *Followed by his ongoing insults that I had a lot in common with his ****ing **** of a mother. *So, Judge Lane, confused, chose the easiest solution, giving 50/50 visitation. * Before the molestation on September 2011, we had been separated since January of 2011. *There was 50/50 visitation only as a result of My ex's promise that he would kill me if he got anything less.
If I withhold my children, logic dictates that I am responding to The court 's admonishments and what could be perceived as an indirect order or even threat about my judge's future decisions do a better job protecting my children. *I am prepared to follow her advice to follow my gut, which is to protect my children at all costs, including a supposed court order that I have yet to see in black and white. *I am now unrepresented, and My attny effectively stole $15,000 from my pocket, plus claims I owe him an additional $1,400+ for his crap work.
I need and will settle for nothing less that immediate, effective action. *With what I perceive as indirect guidance from the Judge, I believe I should protect my kids the way I know they need to be protected, since the system is riddled with lazy, greedy, misinformed and incompetent " professionals".
*I need to speak to someone about a court order issued on January 13th, 2012 that will put my children in danger. *As such, my urgent question is whether there is ever a good defense for contempt actions such as denying visitation when you are concerned for the welfare of you children? **
Here is is a brief summary of a complicated situation. *I will first address the hearing that granted the temporary order of 50/50 visitation on January 13th, 2012. *As of yet, I have not received an official court order.
Mt ex has an extended TPO against him to protect me, and until The hearing on January 13th, 2012, the TPO also protected my children. * I have fired my attorney for, by his admission, not returning phone calls, and for not preparing for or preventing an emergency hearing called my ex's attorney. * My previous attorney, admitted his lack of preparation outside the hearing to my father and a family friend.
The emergency hearing was called because, as a recovering alcoholic, I was falsely accused of abusing mind altering drugs while caring for my children. *The drugs in question were prescribed by an ER doctor who saw me when I fractured my tailbone on December 27th, 2011. *While in the ER, my Dr prescribed me Lortab. * Notably, the day I fell, I blacked out from the pain. *The pain was worse than labor. *I needed something to relieve the pain. *I have never abused pills, and have been prescribed stronger pain medications without abusing them post pregnancy. *I will admit to being a classic alchoholic, but besides caffeine, and the occasional chocolate indulgence, alchohol is my ONLY drug of choice. **
*Upon direction from my doctor, I took Lortab, as prescribed. *During the time I took the Lortab, I was staying with my parents in Greenville, SC. *This was during winter break and there were 4 capable, loving adults, in addition to myself caring for the children. *In fact they were spoiled with love and attention during this time. * Plus, I was still capable of effectively parenting my children verbally, while immobile. *I started taking Tylenol and a non-narcotic anti-inflamatory after a little over a week and returned to GA, assisted by my boyfriend and father, to make sure Natalia was adjusted and prepared to return to school.** In summary, the call for the hearing was frivolous and should have never occurred. * *Judge Lane was noticeably irritated and exclaimed "WHY ARE WE HERE? * THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY!"
*NOTE: (I began my AA recovery when I lived in NYC in 1995, but relapsed for a short period of time, after being sober since 95, *I had a brief relapse before I left my abusive husband in 2010. *He told me that I was not a bitch anymore when I drank and I believed him - pathetic but true. *Since January of 2011, I have been back in AA WITH NO DESIRE to return to drinking).*
Clearly, the hearing was a desperate and transparent (to everyone except My counsel, who was not paying attention) attempt to achieve a 50/50 visitation for my ex. *The judge did not have all the details, was noticeably confused, and irritated. It didn't help that the report from the psychologist who did the forensic evaluation, let's just call her Sally, on my daughter for sexual abuse evaluated my daughter for sexual abuse, had troublesome inconsistencies and was not admitted to the court. * Sally was not summoned to appear by either counsel. *Medlin's report confirmed my ex rubbed in my daughter's vaginal area in and out of the tub on more than one occasion with his hands, not a towel or washcloth. *Yet, in the report, my husband denied ever bathing her. *Further, Sally previously stated that she would would not complete the report without a final interview with my daughter, which never occurred.*
Stepping back in time to clarify how we got to this point, Sally sent the report to My attny minutes before we left for our 60 day status conference on November 30th, 2011. He*did not have to provide it to opposing counsel, which I later learned. *He did, without fully evaluating or considering strategy,*shooting from the hip and unprepared. *Meanwhile Sally's work was incomplete at best.* Sally initially, after performing one interview with Natalia, wrote a note to the court for a TPO hearing in October 2011 and notified DFACS that My exshould not have access to the children. *The TPO against Josh to protect the children and me was extended. **
Sally's final report, grossly differing from her initial recommendation to withhold visitation, was based on a single interview with my ex. *The interview with my ex was riddled with lies and embellishments and "mistruths" I can prove. * The report concluded*Josh should have visitation (not specifying overnight or not) because although he did touch her in an appropriate way, *it wasn't sexual in nature. *
*I think, REALLY????? *This doctor went to Harvard to validate spouting such drivel? *I could do better than that without a degree. * Where was her integrity, professional responsibility, education, and common sense?
The Judge understood that I gave 5 days of unsupervised visitation to the children, based on Kupferman telling me that I would absolutely lose my children if I didn't give visitation. *After the hearing, the TPO REMAINED IN PLACE AND THERE WAS NO CUSTODY ORDER. * *My attnygave me unclear advice on how to move forward but finally told me that I was withholding the children and would lose custody if I didn't give Josh continued access to the children against every instinct I had before the status conference scheduled for January 30th, 2012. *So, I allowed My ex Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas with his family. * *Against my request, My ex promised a visit after my daughter's*January 6th birthday to receive gifts and go horseback riding. * In an effort to follow legal counsel, and keeping in mind that My ex had threatened to keep(steal)the kids if I didn't meet his demands, I offered him a weekend to celebrate her birthday.
*During the emergency hearing on January 13 th*The judge*admonished me for not protecting my children from Mr Meeks if I felt they were unsafe, keeping them from him after my attorney told me I have no choice but to let them see him. *After closing arguments, the judge admonished me and she said I should have ignored my attorney, and withheld the children from the father. * Please keep in mind that I have a recorded threat from My ex on the day after Christmas to not return the kids. *On multiple occasions, he threatened to kill me if I took his kids away from him "like his ****ing **** of a mother who took him from his his father". *Followed by his ongoing insults that I had a lot in common with his ****ing **** of a mother. *So, Judge Lane, confused, chose the easiest solution, giving 50/50 visitation. * Before the molestation on September 2011, we had been separated since January of 2011. *There was 50/50 visitation only as a result of My ex's promise that he would kill me if he got anything less.
If I withhold my children, logic dictates that I am responding to The court 's admonishments and what could be perceived as an indirect order or even threat about my judge's future decisions do a better job protecting my children. *I am prepared to follow her advice to follow my gut, which is to protect my children at all costs, including a supposed court order that I have yet to see in black and white. *I am now unrepresented, and My attny effectively stole $15,000 from my pocket, plus claims I owe him an additional $1,400+ for his crap work.
I need and will settle for nothing less that immediate, effective action. *With what I perceive as indirect guidance from the Judge, I believe I should protect my kids the way I know they need to be protected, since the system is riddled with lazy, greedy, misinformed and incompetent " professionals".