It has come to this. Help request on alimony and child support

[Just Blue]

You’re right! I am burned out. I’ve been going through a year and a half of my divorce and it’s still not final. I was used and abused for years and now I am trying to get smart. I didn’t insult you. I made a mistake in judging whether you caught that. I’m new here so give me a bit of a break. I gave birth to three beautiful boys and now I hope to enjoy them without constant berating insults. Thank you very much!

If you have an issue start your own thread. Stop posting nonsense to other members threads.

 

[xylene]

I never understand these cryptic divorce posts that despite being long on detail do not mention the reason for marital breakdown...

Is it sex?

 

[LdiJ]

I never understand these cryptic divorce posts that despite being long on detail do not mention the reason for marital breakdown...

Is it sex?

Odds are that its something that the OP is responsible for. They are usually VERY long on detail if they think its the other party's fault.

 

[AlmostThere]

I never understand these cryptic divorce posts that despite being long on detail do not mention the reason for marital breakdown...

Is it sex?

Odds are that its something that the OP is responsible for. They are usually VERY long on detail if they think its the other party's fault.

Really, the reason for marital breakdown does not matter. We can suggest that OP tries a year of counseling, with or without his spouse. Even if OP does not want to be married anymore, and the marriage cannot be salvaged, it is good to have counseling before, during and after making a decision of this significance. There are divorces that result in bitter situations that are awful for the couple and even worse for the children, and divorces where things end amicably and effective co-parenting is possible.

But OPs question has been answered. He will likely be paying alimony, child support in NY goes to age 21 and is largely formulaic. NY is an equitable distribution state, which means assets and debs will be fairly shared. OP may be able to retire one day -but needs to keep his child support and alimony requirements in mind when he does.

If OP thought divorce would make his life financially easier, he is very wrong.

 

[xylene]

Really, the reason for marital breakdown does not matter. We can suggest that OP tries a year of counseling, with or without his spouse. Even if OP does not want to be married anymore, and the marriage cannot be salvaged, it is good to have counseling before, during and after making a decision of this significance. There are divorces that result in bitter situations that are awful for the couple and even worse for the children, and divorces where things end amicably and effective co-parenting is possible.

But OPs question has been answered. He will likely be paying alimony, child support in NY goes to age 21 and is largely formulaic. NY is an equitable distribution state, which means assets and debs will be fairly shared. OP may be able to retire one day -but needs to keep his child support and alimony requirements in mind when he does.

If OP thought divorce would make his life financially easier, he is very wrong.

You're a dupe.

The reasons matter.

And they matter for how the op should proceed.

If sex is the issue, he can find an outlet for that.


Your religious scruples are trash

 

[stealth2]

Your religious scruples are trash

Don't see where these came into play.