Just got served

[sixpackpayne]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas

My sister lives in Texas & has a 9 month old baby. She just got served divorce papers stating that she can't leave the county. She is a stay at home mom & everything is in her husbands name. He is very controlling & she didn't think it would come to this. With no money, car or job she really can't leave the house. All of her family is in Oklahoma. This is where she plans to move back to after the divorce. Can he keep her from doing that? She can't afford to live there. He doesn't want custody he just wants her to live in a different house in that area. It really seems confusing to me. He seems to contradict himself alot. I don't honestly understand how a judge can order you to live in a state where you have nothing and don't know anyone other than the soon to be ex husbands family.

 

[mommyof4]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas

My sister lives in Texas & has a 9 month old baby. She just got served divorce papers stating that she can't leave the county. She is a stay at home mom & everything is in her husbands name. He is very controlling & she didn't think it would come to this. With no money, car or job she really can't leave the house. All of her family is in Oklahoma. This is where she plans to move back to after the divorce. Can he keep her from doing that? She can't afford to live there. He doesn't want custody he just wants her to live in a different house in that area. It really seems confusing to me. He seems to contradict himself alot. I don't honestly understand how a judge can order you to live in a state where you have nothing and don't know anyone other than the soon to be ex husbands family.

and the CHILD'S family (that would be Mom and Dad).

 

[sixpackpayne]

Yes in fact she does know herself & her soon to be exhusband. I guess I don't understand how that has anything to do with the question I was asking......sorry.

 

[sipa]

I think that what you missed in the previous response was that Mom and Dad and Baby make a family.

If she is just now getting service with her divorce paperwork I am sure her emotions have her feeling trapped. She needs to breathe.

Unfortunalty when you commit to someone and have a child it makes it harder to just get up and move. But right now sounds like she needs to cross one bridge at a time

 

[sixpackpayne]

Maybe I did too much explaining & my question was hid in details.
Basically I just wanted to see if my sisters soon to be ex-husband can force her to stay in the county they currently live in?

 

[mommyof4]

Maybe I did too much explaining & my question was hid in details.
Basically I just wanted to see if my sisters soon to be ex-husband can force her to stay in the county they currently live in?

Can her husband for her to stay? No.

However, it's not her husband that issued the order and YOU are not the person that recieved the restraining order.

I have a feeling that she has been restrained from removing the CHILD from the jurisdiction of the court, as she (your sister, the adult) has a constitutional right to live anywhere she wishes.

Until we hear from your sister, we won't know what was issued.

However, whatever order was issued, she would be wise to comply.

 

[sixpackpayne]

I think that what you missed in the previous response was that Mom and Dad and Baby make a family.

If she is just now getting service with her divorce paperwork I am sure her emotions have her feeling trapped. She needs to breathe.

Unfortunalty when you commit to someone and have a child it makes it harder to just get up and move. But right now sounds like she needs to cross one bridge at a time

And thats where my confusion starts...he filed for divorce, not her. She does feel trapped because she has nowhere to go. He is telling her "I want a divorce, I want you & our son to get out but you better not go far. BTW, both vehicles are in my name & have huge payments so I am sure you can't afford to take either of them. With no money or job I don't where you will go but you can't stay here. Maybe you could stay at my parents house for a while" I am sorry but thats confusing as hell to me! She is not the one that filed for divorce.....so what does she do....stay with her soon to be ex in laws or go to a homeless shelter?

 

[mommyof4]

And thats where my confusion starts...he filed for divorce, not her. She does feel trapped because she has nowhere to go. He is telling her "I want a divorce, I want you & our son to get out but you better not go far. BTW, both vehicles are in my name & have huge payments so I am sure you can't afford to take either of them. With no money or job I don't where you will go but you can't stay here. Maybe you could stay at my parents house for a while" I am sorry but thats confusing as hell to me! She is not the one that filed for divorce.....so what does she do....stay with her soon to be ex in laws or go to a homeless shelter?

She gets a job and starts standing on her own two feet. The property disposition will be worked out in the divorce.

Here's a link for legal aid providers in TX

TexasLawHelp.org | Legal Programs Directory

 

[sixpackpayne]

Can her husband for her to stay? No.

However, it's not her husband that issued the order and YOU are not the person that recieved the restraining order.

I have a feeling that she has been restrained from removing the CHILD from the jurisdiction of the court, as she (your sister, the adult) has a constitutional right to live anywhere she wishes.

Until we hear from your sister, we won't know what was issued.

However, whatever order was issued, she would be wise to comply.

For now she is staying their house. My advice to her was that the house is in both of your names. You have as much of a right to be there as he does. Stay there & sleep on the couch until you go to court. She really can't do much else. Can he force her out of the house? It would not be a wise decision on his part but could he?
She said the papers say she has to stay in the county until the court date & he told her that he had discussed with his lawyer not letting her leave the state with the baby at all. Supposedly the lawyer told him that was possible. True she could leave without the baby but what kind of person would do that? He has already told her he doesn't want custody just a relationship with his son**************she is the only person the baby has ever been with. His parents live 20 minutes away & see him once a month.

 

[sipa]

I'm sorry has he kicked her out of the house or just served her with divorce paperwork.?

 

[sixpackpayne]

She gets a job and starts standing on her own two feet. The property disposition will be worked out in the divorce.

Here's a link for legal aid providers in TX

TexasLawHelp.org | Legal Programs Directory

She had an excellent job & he made her quit to stay home after the baby was born. He is extremely controlling. She babysits his cousins baby & he expects her to continue with this as a form of income.....we are complete opposites.....I would have poisoned his ass & been done with it!

 

[LdiJ]

She had an excellent job & he made her quit to stay home after the baby was born. He is extremely controlling. She babysits his cousins baby & he expects her to continue with this as a form of income.....we are complete opposites.....I would have poisoned his ass & been done with it!

Providing daycare can certainly be a viable option for earning income. However she certainly doesn't have to continue doing that if she can get a job that she prefers, instead.

She needs to stay put until the judge orders her to move out. She can also ask the judge for permission to relocate with the child. She may or may not get that permission, but its perfectly ok to ask.

 

[mommyof4]

For now she is staying their house. My advice to her was that the house is in both of your names. You have as much of a right to be there as he does. Stay there & sleep on the couch until you go to court. She really can't do much else. Can he force her out of the house? It would not be a wise decision on his part but could he?
She said the papers say she has to stay in the county until the court date & he told her that he had discussed with his lawyer not letting her leave the state with the baby at all. Supposedly the lawyer told him that was possible. True she could leave without the baby but what kind of person would do that? He has already told her he doesn't want custody just a relationship with his son**************she is the only person the baby has ever been with. His parents live 20 minutes away & see him once a month.

She does NOT have to leave the home.

She should NOT be taking an legal 'advice' from him supposedly given by his atty. (That's why I included the link)

So, the order has been issued barring her from removing the child from the state. That is enforceable and is pretty standard.

She has the right to refuse to babysit anyone for any reason.

Seriously, go to the link. There are wonderful resources listed. She is going to have to grow a backbone. She definitely SHOULD seek employment, both for her own sense of pride and accomplishment AND for practical purposes.

 

[sixpackpayne]

Okay I just talked to her...he stayed home from work today because he didn't want her to to try to get an attorney. She did however call legal-aid & is now waiting for them to call her back which they are supposed to do today. He felt like she didn't get anything accomplished & left the house. She doesn't know if he went to work or what. I am hoping she feels better after talking to someone at legal aid. I have been after her for a while to keep a list of the things he does so she can look at it next time he is convincing her to do something he wants her to do. I just found out today that he gave her $60 a week to buy food, formula & diapers. Its not like he can't afford to give her more thats what he thought was appropriate. I told her to open the garage door put a for sale sign on the pool table, big screen tv, wii & whatever else she thought she could sale & when he asks why tell him its to buy groceries, formula & diapers. They met at a really bad time in her life & she fell for everything he said & he has now gained complete control over her & she is somewhat trapped. I am a little more high strung than her & I would handle things different but she would like to resolve this peacefully. She wants what is best for her baby. I hope they can have a peaceful divorce but I think she has to stand up to him or he will walk all over her. She doesn't have anyone to go to down there because everyone she knows is in Oklahoma.

 

[Ohiogal]

And thats where my confusion starts...he filed for divorce, not her. She does feel trapped because she has nowhere to go. He is telling her "I want a divorce, I want you & our son to get out but you better not go far. BTW, both vehicles are in my name & have huge payments so I am sure you can't afford to take either of them. With no money or job I don't where you will go but you can't stay here. Maybe you could stay at my parents house for a while" I am sorry but thats confusing as hell to me! She is not the one that filed for divorce.....so what does she do....stay with her soon to be ex in laws or go to a homeless shelter?

She needs to get a job quite frankly. She needs to work somewhere and become a bit mroe independent. Until she gets an order forcing her to move from the marital home she doesn't have to. She can receive one of the vehicles in the divorce. However she will have to pay for it. She MIGHT qualify for spousal support, and, if she has primary custody, child support. But she cannot remove the child from the county.