Looking into separation

[OHRoadwarrior]

Believe it or not, courts don't just throw people out of their homes because one spouse wants to separate and do an asset grab. If you fear for your safety, LEAVE.

 

[nextwife]

Actually, this depends very much on the individual bank - they all have different rules.

For example, I know one bank that only counts rental income after it has been in place for 18 months. Another local bank only counts rental income if the loan to value is under 70%, but they start counting it as soon as a lease is signed and the first month's rent is collected..

True, but they will, for sure NOT count POTENTIAL rent, and they won't count rent in her home, there must be a legally seperate rentable unit. Most in law suites are not zoned as totally seperate rental units.

 

[Seeking Peace]

I want to say I appreciate all who came on here to offer me advice in an open manner and in a professional manner and not made any inappropriate or unnecessary comments.

I do have to admit, I see some who have made it a bit personal, or responded in an inappropriate way that I find not a response that would come from a professional, and I just kind of let it go and ignored it. The comments I find kind of odd are the "batting your eyelashes line" and the one accusing me of being an "asset grabber." My motives are only to give my son a stable home, and I know he would not adjust well to moving into another place, and he is truly the one I am most concerned about. Why would anyone want to uproot a child, what happened to doing what is best for the child? My motives are for my son's best interest.

I do leave my home with my son when I fear him, and he has gotten out of control, and I return later once he has calmed down, but I do not think that I should have to uproot my son from his home. It seems like no one considers the children. I am seeing this from my mother point of view. I am not in any way an "asset grabber" as someone suggested.

Maybe I should just call the cops the next time he looses control and is in a drunken state, and then it will be on record and he will probalby by removed from the house anyway.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

You need to use your head when separating. Sure, call the police have him arrested and thrown out. When he loses his job and can no longer make house payments, make sure you know who to blame. The end of a marriage should be open and organized. If you can work out all the details, you can preserve the assets you have accumulated. If you don't, fine, give them all to the lawyers.

 

[mistoffolees]

Maybe I should just call the cops the next time he looses control and is in a drunken state, and then it will be on record and he will probalby by removed from the house anyway.

Funny how that only comes to light after you've been told that you can't automatically get your way simply because you want your husband thrown out.

 

[Ohiogal]

I want to say I appreciate all who came on here to offer me advice in an open manner and in a professional manner and not made any inappropriate or unnecessary comments.

I do have to admit, I see some who have made it a bit personal, or responded in an inappropriate way that I find not a response that would come from a professional, and I just kind of let it go and ignored it. The comments I find kind of odd are the "batting your eyelashes line" and the one accusing me of being an "asset grabber." My motives are only to give my son a stable home, and I know he would not adjust well to moving into another place, and he is truly the one I am most concerned about. Why would anyone want to uproot a child, what happened to doing what is best for the child? My motives are for my son's best interest.

I do leave my home with my son when I fear him, and he has gotten out of control, and I return later once he has calmed down, but I do not think that I should have to uproot my son from his home. It seems like no one considers the children. I am seeing this from my mother point of view. I am not in any way an "asset grabber" as someone suggested.

Maybe I should just call the cops the next time he looses control and is in a drunken state, and then it will be on record and he will probalby by removed from the house anyway.

Lady, I consider the children constantly. Quite frankly YOU are considering YOUR wants. The child can stay with dad. You have NO EVIDENCE that dad is a danger or not a good father. There is NO PROOF that he is not. YOU do NOT get to dictate. You don't want to uproot your child yet you have no issues taking him anytime you feel like it. You are seeing this from YOUR biased point of view. You want dad to leave because you asked. Dad doesn't have to leave unless there is a COURT ORDER telling him too. And quite frankly, he very well may NOT be ordered to leave because he is the ONLY ONE on the mortgage. If you want your own place then YOU MOVE.

 

[Seeking Peace]

Lady, I consider the children constantly. Quite frankly YOU are considering YOUR wants. The child can stay with dad. You have NO EVIDENCE that dad is a danger or not a good father. There is NO PROOF that he is not. YOU do NOT get to dictate. You don't want to uproot your child yet you have no issues taking him anytime you feel like it. You are seeing this from YOUR biased point of view. You want dad to leave because you asked. Dad doesn't have to leave unless there is a COURT ORDER telling him too. And quite frankly, he very well may NOT be ordered to leave because he is the ONLY ONE on the mortgage. If you want your own place then YOU MOVE.

Lady, I consider the children constantly. Quite frankly YOU are considering YOUR wants. The child can stay with dad. You have NO EVIDENCE that dad is a danger or not a good father. There is NO PROOF that he is not. YOU do NOT get to dictate. You don't want to uproot your child yet you have no issues taking him anytime you feel like it. You are seeing this from YOUR biased point of view. You want dad to leave because you asked. Dad doesn't have to leave unless there is a COURT ORDER telling him too. And quite frankly, he very well may NOT be ordered to leave because he is the ONLY ONE on the mortgage. If you want your own place then YOU MOVE.

I find it kind of odd that you are taking things to a personal level and that you think you know me and what proof I have about my husband as far as what type of father he is and whether he is a danger to my son. If you truly look out for the children you would encourage someone to remove themself from a situation where verbal abuse is taking place, and why would I leave my son with someone who is out of control. That's not looking out for the children. I feel bad for your clients, if you even are a lawyer. I don't leave for days with my son, I leave for an hour or two while the husband calms down. I have seen instances where my husband does not make the best decisions when with my son and so have other family members. I am still chuckling that you would say that. You act like you know me and you know my situation personally, but you don't.

You have no idea of what I have been through, and my reasons for wanting him to leave the home.

You must be some lonely person who has deep rooted issues that you need to come on this site, make yourself out to be something you are probably not and judge people like you do. I don't think this site is something that you consider yourself to help others in any way. I think you like to come on here and put people down to make yourself feel better. What kind of person in your line of work would advise someone to leave their child with an out of control man? It does not make any sense. I think this site and you being a so called lawyer is a joke. From other things I've read, this is your track record anyway, you like to judge people and put them down. I feel kind of sorry for you. Real lawyers don't have time and have real careers and wouldn't be on her doing what you are doing. How pathetic.

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

 

[Ohiogal]

I find it kind of odd that you are taking things to a personal level and that you think you know me and what proof I have about my husband as far as what type of father he is and whether he is a danger to my son. If you truly look out for the children you would encourage someone to remove themself from a situation where verbal abuse is taking place, and why would I leave my son with someone who is out of control. That's not looking out for the children. I feel bad for your clients, if you even are a lawyer. I don't leave for days with my son, I leave for an hour or two while the husband calms down. I have seen instances where my husband does not make the best decisions when with my son and so have other family members. I am still chuckling that you would say that. You act like you know me and you know my situation personally, but you don't.

You have no idea of what I have been through, and my reasons for wanting him to leave the home.

You must be some lonely person who has deep rooted issues that you need to come on this site, make yourself out to be something you are probably not and judge people like you do. I don't think this site is something that you consider yourself to help others in any way. I think you like to come on here and put people down to make yourself feel better. What kind of person in your line of work would advise someone to leave their child with an out of control man? It does not make any sense. I think this site and you being a so called lawyer is a joke. From other things I've read, this is your track record anyway, you like to judge people and put them down. I feel kind of sorry for you. Real lawyers don't have time and have real careers and wouldn't be on her doing what you are doing. How pathetic.

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

Actually, Casey Anthony is "not guilty" of killing her child or harming her child. That is a FACT. Why? Because that is how the LEGAL SYSTEM works. Maybe you should realize that because the legal system that found her NOT GUILTY is the same one you will be dealing with in order to get your husband out of the house. You have fun. Because you were told the truth. The fact that you don't like reality matters not.

 

[Proserpina]

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

You went there, huh? You have no actual argument - so you went there?

That says an awful lot about you. An awful lot. Truly.

(And really, Casey Anthony IS legally NOT GUILTY. Accept it. Get over it. Move on. Make sure you understand WHY before you start pulling that card, okay?)

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

I find it kind of odd that you are taking things to a personal level and that you think you know me and what proof I have about my husband as far as what type of father he is and whether he is a danger to my son. If you truly look out for the children you would encourage someone to remove themself from a situation where verbal abuse is taking place, and why would I leave my son with someone who is out of control. That's not looking out for the children. I feel bad for your clients, if you even are a lawyer. I don't leave for days with my son, I leave for an hour or two while the husband calms down. I have seen instances where my husband does not make the best decisions when with my son and so have other family members. I am still chuckling that you would say that. You act like you know me and you know my situation personally, but you don't.

You have no idea of what I have been through, and my reasons for wanting him to leave the home.

You must be some lonely person who has deep rooted issues that you need to come on this site, make yourself out to be something you are probably not and judge people like you do. I don't think this site is something that you consider yourself to help others in any way. I think you like to come on here and put people down to make yourself feel better. What kind of person in your line of work would advise someone to leave their child with an out of control man? It does not make any sense. I think this site and you being a so called lawyer is a joke. From other things I've read, this is your track record anyway, you like to judge people and put them down. I feel kind of sorry for you. Real lawyers don't have time and have real careers and wouldn't be on her doing what you are doing. How pathetic.

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

You don't like the LEGAL answers. Fact of the matter is that you cannot afford the mortgage; the husband keeps the house and you move.

Unless you can PROVE abuse, dad has as much right to the child as you do; having a uterus is NOT what a judge will look at.

As for Casey Anthony, she was found, in a court of law, NOT GUILTY. If you actually KNOW what happened, then they should try you for not speaking up before hand to be subpoenad to court.

 

[mistoffolees]

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

Aside from the offensiveness of your statement, let me point something out to you.

Casey Anthony was found not guilty. That tells you a great deal about the standards of evidence required and what you would need to prove to show that your husband is a danger to the child. It pretty strongly reaffirms what you've been told. Without clear, convincing, irrefutable evidence that your husband is a danger, you're not likely to get him thrown out of the house via restraining order.

And since his 'danger' didn't appear in any of your messages until you failed to get the advice you wanted, I'd be surprised if you can meet that evidentiary standard.

So what is the 'proof' that he's a danger to the child?

I have seen instances where my husband does not make the best decisions when with my son and so have other family members

I've got news for you. Even if you could prove that your husband doesn't make the best decisions 100% of the time, so what? None of us ever makes the best decision every time. Even without knowing you, I can guarantee that I could say that there are instances where you didn't make the best decisions when with your son. You could say the same thing about me - or anyone else on this forum. NONE OF US consistently makes the BEST decision every single time. So why should that fact allow you to take your child away from your husband?

 

[stealth2]

If you truly look out for the children you would encourage someone to remove themself from a situation where verbal abuse is taking place

Which is exactly what you WERE advised to do.

I have seen instances where my husband does not make the best decisions when with my son and so have other family members. I am still chuckling that you would say that. You act like you know me and you know my situation personally, but you don't.

And what PROOF do you have? Just saying so doesn't make it provable in court.

The people you represent's kids are going to end up like poor Caylee Anthony if you advise them like you say things here. You are probably one of those who think Casey Anthony is "not guilty."

Despicable. As another poster said, that you would post something like this says a heck of a lot about you. Personally speaking, you can now go pay for a lawyer. I don't see anyone willing to provide you anything for free here.