Modification Order for Child Support _ Cook County, IL

[Lamb66]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Illinois

I have a 16 year old child with a man to whom I was never married. We have been in and out of the courts since our child was roughly 4 years old. Boiler plate stuff, mostly - establishing paternity, mediation for order of visitation, etc. Three years ago, I had to file a contempt motion due to his status as being unemployed and subsequent decision to simply stop paying child support without seeking a modification. That created a lot of hardship for me, as my income was limited at the time and I had to atone for his financial shortfall. At no time, did I withhold visitation, or seek any "revenge" on him. I simply took him to court.

He is again, unemployed. Has been since March 2014. He petitioned for a modification to the existing support order, which was $650/month. We both appeared last Nov. and the judge ordered a temporary reduction from $650/mo. to $450/mo. She set the case for status on July 7, 2015...today. I am traveling 65 miles to court from my home, as I have since moved. I showed up 15 minutes late, as my train was delayed and I have the notice from Metra to confirm this. I approached the Clerk and was informed that the case had already been heard/ordered. I saw the order. An order to modify child support had been entered; not only has he not found gainful employment in the 8 months the judge gave him, today she further reduced the child support amount to $100/month. States that he must let me know within 72 hours when he's found employment. No indication anywhere that he's compelled to find employment, mind you.

Okay, I get it...I was late. But it wasn't "the dog ate my homework" excuse, I had the means to prove why I was late. Furthermore, I don't understand how the court's decision to reward someone who is on the Cousin Eddie Career Path of holding out for the management position benefits our child in any way. At $100/mo., he should have been ordered to take ANY job; as, minimum wage would yield a higher amount of child support than what she ordered today.

It was obvious that her actions were punitive, when I have never violated any condition of any of our agreed orders and I'm at a loss to understand how any judge can find it reasonable to burden the custodial parent with the financial support obligations of non-custodial parent, who is by choice, unemployed. Who claims he has no income, yet manages to make a car payment and have a working cell phone.

I'm beyond upset by the events of today. I have contacted an attorney, who is going to petition to have the order vacated...yet more money I get to spend on the 2-legged test tube. The reason I call him that, is not only has he essentially abandoned his son financially (again), he has seen him 3 times in the past year, so the abandonment is also emotional/physical.

This judge must feel I am independently wealthy and I must be taught a lesson, starting with the original temporary reduction that was ordered for an excessive period of time, in my opinion. For him to show up 8 months later with no job, not even minimum wage, while I, the working, responsible person, was hammered for "disrespecting" the court by being tardy when I can provide more proof to back myself up than he can for not having found a job, defies logic.

By the way, he is not destitute...he has an IRA with a current valuation of approx. $200,000 and part ownership in a house he inherited from his father, the value of which is estimated at $150,000 (his share, owned outright). I can't save for my retirement, because I have to keep picking up the slack his irresponsible and court-approved behavior, creates. This absolutely sucks - I could tell the admin folks (including the clerk) in the courtroom felt bad; they were bending over backwards to help me in any way they could today...they looked really uncomfortable, though they can't say anything, nor would I place them in that kind of awkward position.

Is what this judge did in your opinion, unduly harsh? I was there, I had no opportunity to speak on either my son's behalf or on my own...just, "here ya go, I support what your ex is pulling on you...have a nice life". Unbelievable. smh.

I know anyone who is on the losing side of a case feels the judge was unfair, but I have not experienced any noticeable bias or intemperate behavior from any judge over the past 12 years, in Cook County, of all places....until today. I haven't always come out on the winning side with the ex, either. But today was about as brutal and disheartening a situation as I have ever experienced.

Guess I just wanted some opinions here.

Admonish me for tardiness; I'm rarely ever late and if I am, there's a verifiable reason.

Thanks in advance!

 

[Proserpina]

The long and short of it is that you didn't turn up, and the hearing went in Dad's favor.

You weren't there, so any commentary doesn't really mean much - but based purely on what you've said here, I don't see any legal wrongdoing although yes, you probably did piss off the judge when you didn't turn up.

Sorry.

 

[stealth2]

Did it occur you to call the court when you knew you would be late? It would have gone against Dad the same way had the situation been reversed. What's good for the goose...

If your 16yo doesn't already have a job? It's time.

 

[Lamb66]

Did it occur you to call the court when you knew you would be late? It would have gone against Dad the same way had the situation been reversed. What's good for the goose...

If your 16yo doesn't already have a job? It's time.

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

 

[Lamb66]

The long and short of it is that you didn't turn up, and the hearing went in Dad's favor.

You weren't there, so any commentary doesn't really mean much - but based purely on what you've said here, I don't see any legal wrongdoing although yes, you probably did piss off the judge when you didn't turn up.

Sorry.

I agree with you; I'm not disputing the judge's ruling, though I think we can both agree that the ruling itself did little to further what is in the best interests of the child involved in this case. However, I am fully responsible for myself and my punctuality (or lack thereof)...I responded to the person whose post followed yours and indicated there that I have retained an attorney who's filed for a Motion to Vacate, among other things. We'll see how that goes. Thanks for your feedback, I appreciate it!

 

[Just Blue]

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

You are so flipping OUT OF LINE! How could Stealth have know any of the things about your sons ASD issues? YOU NEVER stated it! Go hire an attorney. I, and I am sure many others on this forum (attorneys included), do not like to deal with RUDE CHILDREN.

Have a good day
Blue

 

[Silverplum]

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

Your attorney will guide you further: the help you get will have to be paid professionals. I wouldn't volunteer to help such as you.

If you thought you'd be answered by an IL attorney here, you were mistaken.

 

[Lamb66]

You are so flipping OUT OF LINE! How could Stealth have know any of the things about your sons ASD issues? YOU NEVER stated it! Go hire an attorney. I, and I am sure many others on this forum (attorneys included), do not like to deal with RUDE CHILDREN.

Have a good day
Blue

Learn how to read. I DID hire an attorney and I DID state that in my response to Moron #1. You are absolutely right...Stealth didn't know about my son's conditions, because it was never a relevant fact to a ruling I was asking about...and not knowing about my son's conditions is PRECISELY the reason Stealth should not comment about things he/she is not competent to comment about - and for which he/she is not being asked to PROVIDE any commentary about.

Get it now, #2?

Have a good night. Is it daytime on your planet?

 

[Proserpina]

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

I predict an upcoming encounter with the OG Effect.

Such encounters are very common when obnoxious bullies puff out their little cyberchests.

You're welcome.

 

[Just Blue]

Learn how to read. I DID hire an attorney and I DID state that in my response to Moron #1. You are absolutely right...Stealth didn't know about my son's conditions, because it was never a relevant fact to a ruling I was asking about...and not knowing about my son's conditions is PRECISELY the reason Stealth should not comment about things he/she is not competent to comment about - and for which he/she is not being asked to PROVIDE any commentary about.

Get it now, #2?

Have a good night. Is it daytime on your planet?

Charming. I am sure your attorney thinks to his/herself "Can't wait to See you Next Time" . I am sure your beloved by all. Have a nice NIGHT!

 

[Silverplum]

The obvious lesson to all is: if you want to be taken seriously by your Judge, show up for your court hearing.

It's not grade school: nobody will sympathize or hold your hand. It's pass/fail, and you failed.

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Illinois

I have a 16 year old child with a man to whom I was never married. We have been in and out of the courts since our child was roughly 4 years old. Boiler plate stuff, mostly - establishing paternity, mediation for order of visitation, etc. Three years ago, I had to file a contempt motion due to his status as being unemployed and subsequent decision to simply stop paying child support without seeking a modification. That created a lot of hardship for me, as my income was limited at the time and I had to atone for his financial shortfall. At no time, did I withhold visitation, or seek any "revenge" on him. I simply took him to court.

He is again, unemployed. Has been since March 2014. He petitioned for a modification to the existing support order, which was $650/month. We both appeared last Nov. and the judge ordered a temporary reduction from $650/mo. to $450/mo. She set the case for status on July 7, 2015...today. I am traveling 65 miles to court from my home, as I have since moved. I showed up 15 minutes late, as my train was delayed and I have the notice from Metra to confirm this. I approached the Clerk and was informed that the case had already been heard/ordered. I saw the order. An order to modify child support had been entered; not only has he not found gainful employment in the 8 months the judge gave him, today she further reduced the child support amount to $100/month. States that he must let me know within 72 hours when he's found employment. No indication anywhere that he's compelled to find employment, mind you.

Okay, I get it...I was late. But it wasn't "the dog ate my homework" excuse, I had the means to prove why I was late. Furthermore, I don't understand how the court's decision to reward someone who is on the Cousin Eddie Career Path of holding out for the management position benefits our child in any way. At $100/mo., he should have been ordered to take ANY job; as, minimum wage would yield a higher amount of child support than what she ordered today.

It was obvious that her actions were punitive, when I have never violated any condition of any of our agreed orders and I'm at a loss to understand how any judge can find it reasonable to burden the custodial parent with the financial support obligations of non-custodial parent, who is by choice, unemployed. Who claims he has no income, yet manages to make a car payment and have a working cell phone.

I'm beyond upset by the events of today. I have contacted an attorney, who is going to petition to have the order vacated...yet more money I get to spend on the 2-legged test tube. The reason I call him that, is not only has he essentially abandoned his son financially (again), he has seen him 3 times in the past year, so the abandonment is also emotional/physical.

This judge must feel I am independently wealthy and I must be taught a lesson, starting with the original temporary reduction that was ordered for an excessive period of time, in my opinion. For him to show up 8 months later with no job, not even minimum wage, while I, the working, responsible person, was hammered for "disrespecting" the court by being tardy when I can provide more proof to back myself up than he can for not having found a job, defies logic.

By the way, he is not destitute...he has an IRA with a current valuation of approx. $200,000 and part ownership in a house he inherited from his father, the value of which is estimated at $150,000 (his share, owned outright). I can't save for my retirement, because I have to keep picking up the slack his irresponsible and court-approved behavior, creates. This absolutely sucks - I could tell the admin folks (including the clerk) in the courtroom felt bad; they were bending over backwards to help me in any way they could today...they looked really uncomfortable, though they can't say anything, nor would I place them in that kind of awkward position.

Is what this judge did in your opinion, unduly harsh? I was there, I had no opportunity to speak on either my son's behalf or on my own...just, "here ya go, I support what your ex is pulling on you...have a nice life". Unbelievable. smh.

I know anyone who is on the losing side of a case feels the judge was unfair, but I have not experienced any noticeable bias or intemperate behavior from any judge over the past 12 years, in Cook County, of all places....until today. I haven't always come out on the winning side with the ex, either. But today was about as brutal and disheartening a situation as I have ever experienced.

Guess I just wanted some opinions here.

Admonish me for tardiness; I'm rarely ever late and if I am, there's a verifiable reason.

Thanks in advance!

 

[Ohiogal]

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

You were the one out of line. You were ORDERED to appear at a specific time in court. YOU were not there on time. If this had been a criminal case, you would have had a warrant for your arrest due to the fact that you did NOT find this hearing important enough to attend on time.

 

[Ohiogal]

Learn how to read. I DID hire an attorney and I DID state that in my response to Moron #1. You are absolutely right...Stealth didn't know about my son's conditions, because it was never a relevant fact to a ruling I was asking about...and not knowing about my son's conditions is PRECISELY the reason Stealth should not comment about things he/she is not competent to comment about - and for which he/she is not being asked to PROVIDE any commentary about.

Get it now, #2?

Have a good night. Is it daytime on your planet?

The only moron here is you. You seem to believe that you can rely on child support. No. You can't. If you have a shortfall in your budget, that is on you. Child support is a reimbursement and not extra income. Furthermore, your attitude here says a lot about your lack of manners, lack of ability to communicate well, and may give a lot of explanation as to why you ticked off the judge. You seem to believe you are entitled and that the world revolves around you. It doesn't.

 

[stealth2]

Hi there,

I didn't ask for your unsolicited parenting skills advice or recommendations for what my child should be doing at his age...You're commenting in areas of which you are in no way qualified to provide competent advice.

If you did know my child personally, you would already know that he has Asperger's and tonic-clonic seizures (grand mal epilepsy)...sure, son, go out and get a job to contribute to your own support, because that's what all kids should do when one of their parents decides to become professionally unemployed while sitting on $1/2 million in assets. Did you graduate from Ass Clown University with honors?

Incidentally, I have since retained an attorney, who knows this judge well, is in and out of the Cook County courts every day and was appalled by the ruling in this case. The Motion to Vacate has been filed, in addition to a Petition to Compel Deadbeat Dad to Obtain Employment, and a Motion for an Order to Show Cause regarding the trust he agreed to establish for my son for his IRA and never did...if you actually paid any attention to the case at hand instead of focusing on my minor child's employment status, you could have stated something marginally germane to my post; such as, "well, that's the breaks, BUT, you have 30 days from the date of the order to file for a motion to vacate in Cook County"...instead of telling me that my special needs child needs to get a job.

I understand that people get irrational and combative when they are dealing with matters relative to the well-being of their child(ren)...however, a post such as the one you entered was out of line. I'm no attorney, but I can see why you're sitting on an internet discussion forum condescending to people instead of being voted a Top Lawyer by your peers...thank God I found an attorney who did earn that recognition to advocate for my child, instead relying on a hack like you to tell me that at 16 years old, my son needs to go plow the back 40 and earn his keep.

I'll be sure to post an update here following my next court date and let you know how a good lawyer can actually help people.

I didn't even bother reading all of this crud, littleLamb. A load of blah-blah-blah. Sorry - cry the river to your lawyer. S/He will be quite happy to charge you for the time. I "work" here for free, so don't entertain parental idiocy.

ETA:
P.S. 99% of us here? Are not Attorneys. But we've all graduated from the school of hard knocks.

 

[tuffbrk]

She's just deflecting because she didn't bother to notify the court clerk that she'd be late.