overstepping - again

[jbowman]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I already got some advice for this from a VERY NICE Senior but I wanted to throw this out there to get some more feedback.

I am now ordered to pay CS (as of a month ago) - there is an order to withhold. It came to my attention that overstepping stepmom is contacting my employee payroll department asking about the withholding - when it was taken out, where it was sent etc etc.

The emails overstepper is sending do not explain who she is. She is using her company email address and using her company signature line and her MAIDEN name. My payroll department ASSUMED she was my ex's attorney.

The attorney from my company sent her an email explaining that if her company was not representing her husband, then she needs to stop trying to get my personal info. Here is her response in part: "I was acting as a third-party on behalf of my HUSBAND whom I’m legally married to and I’m sure you were able to perceive that given the emails. Like yourself, handling all legal affairs on behalf of "company" – I handle all personal, legal, and financial correspondence pertaining to our household. "

I am completely amazed. She apparently refuses. My company will not give her any info about me - im not worried about that. But what can I do to stop this behavior???

 

[LillianX]

I'd have a nice, calm conversation with your ex about it, and if it doesn't stop, seek a restraining order.

Sometimes, I really wish it were legal to just slap someone. Everyone should get one free slap pass a year.

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I already got some advice for this from a VERY NICE Senior but I wanted to throw this out there to get some more feedback.

I am now ordered to pay CS (as of a month ago) - there is an order to withhold. It came to my attention that overstepping stepmom is contacting my employee payroll department asking about the withholding - when it was taken out, where it was sent etc etc.

The emails overstepper is sending do not explain who she is. She is using her company email address and using her company signature line and her MAIDEN name. My payroll department ASSUMED she was my ex's attorney.

The attorney from my company sent her an email explaining that if her company was not representing her husband, then she needs to stop trying to get my personal info. Here is her response in part: "I was acting as a third-party on behalf of my HUSBAND whom I’m legally married to and I’m sure you were able to perceive that given the emails. Like yourself, handling all legal affairs on behalf of "company" – I handle all personal, legal, and financial correspondence pertaining to our household. "

I am completely amazed. She apparently refuses. My company will not give her any info about me - im not worried about that. But what can I do to stop this behavior???

In addition to the other advice you got, check to see if there are any federal laws which apply. In today's world with identity theft and other such crimes, I'm not sure she can keep attempting to gain personal information like that.

Heck, if nothing else, threaten her with a tortuous interference charge.

 

[jbowman]

This has been an ongoing issue for years in one way or another. I dont know how much evidence I need for a civil restraining order. I looked it up and it says if youre worried about your safety from: stalked threatened, harassed, or sexually assaulted. Is it considered harassment if she is contacting my job?

I cant speak to ex. Ive tried many many times. He either doesnt believe it or dismisses it.

I recently got a credit card in the mail that I didnt apply for - called company and they said someone applied for it online and attempted to charge 1000.00 to it. I had funny activity on my checking account in the last week so I had to cancel the account. Im just concerned. But I dont think I can prove it was her. Its just funny all this happened since we went to court and I had to file my check stubs etc in my response.

 

[WittyUserName]

Sometimes, I really wish it were legal to just slap someone. Everyone should get one free slap pass a year.

...best thing I read all day.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Here is her response in part: "I was acting as a third-party on behalf of my HUSBAND whom I’m legally married to and I’m sure you were able to perceive that given the emails. Like yourself, handling all legal affairs on behalf of "company

Is she representing herself as an attorney?

 

[PQN]

I recently got a credit card in the mail that I didnt apply for - called company and they said someone applied for it online and attempted to charge 1000.00 to it. I had funny activity on my checking account in the last week so I had to cancel the account. Im just concerned. But I dont think I can prove it was her. Its just funny all this happened since we went to court and I had to file my check stubs etc in my response.

I would file a fraud alert with all 3 credit bureaus. Can your attorney contact that credit card company and get the IP address of the computer that was used to apply for the credit card and the one(s) that tried to charge the $1000 to it??? If you can show the judge that it was done from a computer that she had access to (her work or home), it may be enough for a civil restraining order.

 

[jbowman]

I would file a fraud alert with all 3 credit bureaus. Can your attorney contact that credit card company and get the IP address of the computer that was used to apply for the credit card and the one(s) that tried to charge the $1000 to it??? If you can show the judge that it was done from a computer that she had access to (her work or home), it may be enough for a civil restraining order.

I did file the fraud alert. I actually dont have an attorney - the attorney that sent the email to her was my company's attorney telling her to stop requesting personal employee info.

At this point, because of the CS Ive been ordered to pay, I can not afford an attorney.

@Tink - the emails she sent were from her company email - using her company signature line (no title) and using her maiden name. She did not identify herself as his wife. She just requested the information. MY company attorney took that as she was trying to give the IMPRESSION that she was an attorney.

 

[mistoffolees]

I would file a fraud alert with all 3 credit bureaus. Can your attorney contact that credit card company and get the IP address of the computer that was used to apply for the credit card and the one(s) that tried to charge the $1000 to it??? If you can show the judge that it was done from a computer that she had access to (her work or home), it may be enough for a civil restraining order.

I would go beyond that. You're talking about civil penalties, but she could also get criminal penalties. I would file a report with the local police. Identity theft is a crime.

 

[Proserpina]

Is she representing herself as an attorney?

Oh, I do hope so.

That's SO close to the line - I'd hope the court might actually err on the side of caution and sanction the overstepping B!

 

[gr8rn]

I'd have a nice, calm conversation with your ex about it, and if it doesn't stop, seek a restraining order.

Sometimes, I really wish it were legal to just slap someone. Everyone should get one free slap pass a year.

I couldn't agree more, however I think OP should get 2 free b-slaps--one for the meddling overstepper and one for the eunich-err, ex.

OP, the credit card issue leads me to believe that she has crossed the line and this has become a crime. I wouldn't stop there. I would try to get more information from the credit card company. Perhaps they can persue it and find the IP address from where the card was requested. If she did it once, she may do it again. Remember, credit cards request some very personal information, such as SS# AND bank account numbers. She could have used those bank receipts and if she did then it is a crime whether she got away with it or not.

 

[mistoffolees]

I did file the fraud alert. I actually dont have an attorney - the attorney that sent the email to her was my company's attorney telling her to stop requesting personal employee info.

Ask your company's attorney to send a letter to her employer - since she's apparently playing her games from her company's location.

 

[proud_parent]

Everyone should get one free slap pass a year.

How much to purchase additional passes?

 

[Proserpina]

How much to purchase additional passes?

I'd be bankrupt really quickly if things continue as they are

 

[jbowman]

Would it be considered 3rd party interference in Family court if it had nothing to do with my child? I am trying to figure out where exactly to start.

I will try to contact the credit card company again to get info but I shredded the card when it came in the mail after I spoke with them. I will see about contacting Experian or similar to see if they have a record of the account. When I spoke with them, I explained that I never applied and to close the account immediately. I really cant say whether it was her or not.