Parental permission

[Rachel T]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX
My husband has primary custody of his three sons. The oldest is joining the army reserves when he graduates next month. He is turning 18 two days after graduation. My husband and I have both signed papers for the recruiter. Does his birth mother (whom he sees maybe 3x a year, probably not relevant...) need to sign as well? The recruiter himself seems unsure and is getting info for us, but I wanted to ask here as well.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX
My husband has primary custody of his three sons. The oldest is joining the army reserves when he graduates next month. He is turning 18 two days after graduation. My husband and I have both signed papers for the recruiter. Does his birth mother (whom he sees maybe 3x a year, probably not relevant...) need to sign as well? The recruiter himself seems unsure and is getting info for us, but I wanted to ask here as well.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Without reading your posting history, why would YOU need to sign anything? Is your husbands son your son in actuality? If signing prior to his 18th birthday, both of his LEGAL parents need to sign. Not dad and dad's wife.

See link:
http://www.armydomain.com/info/usa/age-and-parental-permission

 

[Rachel T]

That's what I would think...but the recruiter has had me signing away. I am his step mother.

 

[Rachel T]

I went to the link you suggested and here is what it said..

However, if only one parent is entitled to legal custody of the applicant (for example, by reason of divorce decree), then only that parent’s consent is required. The recruiter will identify any supporting document used and indicate its identifying marks, such as petition, file, or docket number in DD Form 1966 remarks section.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

I went to the link you suggested and here is what it said..

However, if only one parent is entitled to legal custody of the applicant (for example, by reason of divorce decree), then only that parent’s consent is required. The recruiter will identify any supporting document used and indicate its identifying marks, such as petition, file, or docket number in DD Form 1966 remarks section.

Depending upon his experience, the recruiter was just trying to cover his butt. Since you are not a parent to the young man, your signature was unnecessary. Does your husband have full legal/custodial placement of his son? If he does, then according to the Army domain, he's in the clear as long as he can show proof of that. Otherwise, regardless of how many times a year his mother has contact, she will have to sign the consent forms. Otherwise, he can wait until his 18th birthday and no one will have to sign anything except him.

 

[Rachel T]

Okay! Thank you very much!

 

[momofrose]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX
My husband has primary custody of his three sons. The oldest is joining the army reserves when he graduates next month. He is turning 18 two days after graduation. My husband and I have both signed papers for the recruiter. Does his birth mother (whom he sees maybe 3x a year, probably not relevant...) need to sign as well? The recruiter himself seems unsure and is getting info for us, but I wanted to ask here as well.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

She is NOT his BIRTHmother - She is his MOTHER - you have no legal right to have signed any papers - and you should have asked her to do that.

"D"

 

[Rachel T]

Actually NO! She is NO kind of mother to him. You have no clue what you are talking about if you refer to her as a mother. With all due respect, I was not signing to offend anyone. I was signing because the recruiter, whom I thought knew what he was doing, asked me to and my son (YES, MY SON! I DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS MY STEP SON) is excited about joining. I considered this other woman and that is why I asked the question in the first place. She may be his mother legally and I will give her the respect that that demands, but beyond that...she is no mother. Legally, I am nothing to this young man, but where it counts, I am everything that a mother can be. I totally back you guys up when you chastise people for throwing around the term "birth mother" and "biological mother" but in this case, I take offense. I did not come on here with a puffy chest demanding any rights. I thought something was wrong and asked the question so that if she legally needed to be involved, that would happen.

 

[Silverplum]

Actually, YES. Even if. Even though. Even whatever.

This is a LEGAL site. (And no, you are NOT being respectful.)

https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/newbies-please-read-before-posting-387214.html

Actually NO! She is NO kind of mother to him. You have no clue what you are talking about if you refer to her as a mother. With all due respect, I was not signing to offend anyone. I was signing because the recruiter, whom I thought knew what he was doing, asked me to and my son (YES, MY SON! I DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS MY STEP SON) is excited about joining. I considered this other woman and that is why I asked the question in the first place. She may be his mother legally and I will give her the respect that that demands, but beyond that...she is no mother. Legally, I am nothing to this young man, but where it counts, I am everything that a mother can be. I totally back you guys up when you chastise people for throwing around the term "birth mother" and "biological mother" but in this case, I take offense. I did not come on here with a puffy chest demanding any rights. I thought something was wrong and asked the question so that if she legally needed to be involved, that would happen.

 

[futuredust]

Actually NO! She is NO kind of mother to him. You have no clue what you are talking about if you refer to her as a mother. With all due respect, I was not signing to offend anyone. I was signing because the recruiter, whom I thought knew what he was doing, asked me to and my son (YES, MY SON! I DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS MY STEP SON) is excited about joining. I considered this other woman and that is why I asked the question in the first place. She may be his mother legally and I will give her the respect that that demands, but beyond that...she is no mother. Legally, I am nothing to this young man, but where it counts, I am everything that a mother can be. I totally back you guys up when you chastise people for throwing around the term "birth mother" and "biological mother" but in this case, I take offense. I did not come on here with a puffy chest demanding any rights. I thought something was wrong and asked the question so that if she legally needed to be involved, that would happen.

I am sorry, but, she gave birth and her rights were not terminated, and you did not adopt.

She is Mom. No matter how you feel about it.

 

[Proserpina]

Actually NO! She is NO kind of mother to him. You have no clue what you are talking about if you refer to her as a mother. With all due respect, I was not signing to offend anyone. I was signing because the recruiter, whom I thought knew what he was doing, asked me to and my son (YES, MY SON! I DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS MY STEP SON) is excited about joining. I considered this other woman and that is why I asked the question in the first place. She may be his mother legally and I will give her the respect that that demands, but beyond that...she is no mother. Legally, I am nothing to this young man, but where it counts, I am everything that a mother can be. I totally back you guys up when you chastise people for throwing around the term "birth mother" and "biological mother" but in this case, I take offense. I did not come on here with a puffy chest demanding any rights. I thought something was wrong and asked the question so that if she legally needed to be involved, that would happen.

You can take as much offense as you like. The law says he is not your son.

Hence, he's not your son.

He has one legal mother. Sorry if that offends you.

 

[Rachel T]

The fact that she is legally his mother does not offend me. What offends me, AND my son, is that the term "mother" is thrown around so loosely. Giving birth does not make you a mom where it counts.
I wrote this thread asking a question so that I did what was right by my son. I got my answer that LEGALLY she needed to sign. No problem! That is what needed to be clarified. I was pretty sure that this was going to be the case since this recruiter seems very wet behind the ears. I politely thanked you (collectively) for the help. Then, I was told I was WRONG to have signed as if I did something deliberately to slight this woman. I had a question. You guys answered. That should be the end.

 

[dannyt]

you are an overstepping stepparent

Actually NO! She is NO kind of mother to him. You have no clue what you are talking about if you refer to her as a mother. With all due respect, I was not signing to offend anyone. I was signing because the recruiter, whom I thought knew what he was doing, asked me to and my son (YES, MY SON! I DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS MY STEP SON) is excited about joining. I considered this other woman and that is why I asked the question in the first place. She may be his mother legally and I will give her the respect that that demands, but beyond that...she is no mother. Legally, I am nothing to this young man, but where it counts, I am everything that a mother can be. I totally back you guys up when you chastise people for throwing around the term "birth mother" and "biological mother" but in this case, I take offense. I did not come on here with a puffy chest demanding any rights. I thought something was wrong and asked the question so that if she legally needed to be involved, that would happen.

legally, he is NOT YOUR SON,and you seriously overstepped. you really need to know your place here. the others are right, you had NO RIGHT TO SIGN ANYTHING, SINCE YOU ARE NOT HIS PARENT. good thing the kid turns 18, otherwise mom can haul dad into court for this. if this was my son, i wouldnt be too happy about you signing papers about MY SON which you had no business signing.

 

[Rachel T]

Good thing that you are not legally his parent then.

For your information, I have a better relationship with her than he does. I did NOT sign a form to overstep. That is why I wrote you guys to defer to your knowledge. I came here to avoid that. And further more, she signed the papers today and took me to lunch!

 

[Silverplum]

The fact that she is legally his mother does not offend me. What offends me, AND my son, is that the term "mother" is thrown around so loosely. Giving birth does not make you a mom where it counts.
I wrote this thread asking a question so that I did what was right by my son. I got my answer that LEGALLY she needed to sign. No problem! That is what needed to be clarified. I was pretty sure that this was going to be the case since this recruiter seems very wet behind the ears. I politely thanked you (collectively) for the help. Then, I was told I was WRONG to have signed as if I did something deliberately to slight this woman. I had a question. You guys answered. That should be the end.

I think I'm gonna come over to your house tonight. I'm gonna open your fridge, eat whatever I please, and leave my dishes on your night table. I'm gonna shave my legs in your bathtub. I'm gonna use up all your hot water. I'm gonna clip my toenails and leave the clippings buried in your rug.

Is THAT how you act when you go to other peoples' homes?

Because that's how your behavior here seems to ME.