Protective order against a minor?

[brightfuture]

What is the name of your state? IN

I know it probably sounds a little extreme, but is there any way a protective order can be served against a 9 year old? My daughter is 10 yrs old and mentally disabled. She was molested by my boyfriend's 9 year old son. He has never apologized, shows no remorse and is very angry that it was found out what he did. I have learned that he did something similiar to another child
and has done other pretty serious things to other children. His mother simply says that he's acting out because of his parents divorce and has never disciplined him for any of these things. Until he receives some type of therapy I do not wish to have him around my daughter again. She can not speak intelligibly and isn't able to defend herself if this were to happen again.
Even though she knows what happened, his mother still insists that he spend time in our home. She has gone so far as to say that if my boyfriend doesn't abide by the custody agreement she will go back to court and ask for more child support, which we can't afford. My boyfriend has been pretty adamant about his son not visiting right now, but his wife keeps pushing.

This child is dangerous and has caused serious injury to another child as well as injury to my daughter. Can I seek a protective order to keep him out of my home and away from my daughter until his mother at least gets counseling for him?

Also, the judge in their divorce did order that the boy receive counseling within 14 days of the filing of the final judgment. As long as she continues to refuse to sign that judgment he doesn't have to be treated. I'm looking for any help I can get.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Which is more important: Your daughter or your nightly pickle tickle?

IAAL

 

[CdwJava]

How about keeping the boyfriend away along with his kid. You don't need a protective order to lock your door.

As long as you allow the boyfriend to be with you, he is likely to be committed to caring for his son. It's a package deal. So it's time to return the package.

- Carl

 

[stealth2]

*Maybe*, instead of turning his back on his son, your boyfriend should commit himself to spending more time with the boy and getting him the help he so obviously needs. And *maybe* you need to find yourself a new boyfriend. Has it occured to either of you to report this to the appropriate authorities?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Notice that our writer is too stupid to come back and discuss the issues.

IAAL

 

[seniorjudge]

"Notice that our writer is too stupid to come back and discuss the issues."

I suspect that most of the people who ask questions on this forum are not members of Mensa.

But, alas, that does not mean that they do not need help.

 

[stealth2]

In OP's other thread, it seems as though the b/f has only been divorced for 4 mos. While the boy's method of acting out is rather disturbing - is it any surprise that he has issues? Is it a surprise that his anger is pointed towards the woman (and by extension, her child) who is taking his Daddy away from him? Sh*t - I'd be pretty pissed off, too. And I'm nowhere near 9. The boy needs help. And perhaps if Daddy stopped thinking with his other head, he'd see his role in the problem.

But what do I know.

Merry effin' Christmas.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

What is the name of your state? IN

I know it probably sounds a little extreme, but is there any way a protective order can be served against a 9 year old? My daughter is 10 yrs old and mentally disabled. She was molested by my boyfriend's 9 year old son. He has never apologized, shows no remorse and is very angry that it was found out what he did. I have learned that he did something similiar to another child
and has done other pretty serious things to other children. His mother simply says that he's acting out because of his parents divorce and has never disciplined him for any of these things. Until he receives some type of therapy I do not wish to have him around my daughter again. She can not speak intelligibly and isn't able to defend herself if this were to happen again.
Even though she knows what happened, his mother still insists that he spend time in our home. She has gone so far as to say that if my boyfriend doesn't abide by the custody agreement she will go back to court and ask for more child support, which we can't afford. My boyfriend has been pretty adamant about his son not visiting right now, but his wife keeps pushing.

This child is dangerous and has caused serious injury to another child as well as injury to my daughter. Can I seek a protective order to keep him out of my home and away from my daughter until his mother at least gets counseling for him?

Also, the judge in their divorce did order that the boy receive counseling within 14 days of the filing of the final judgment. As long as she continues to refuse to sign that judgment he doesn't have to be treated. I'm looking for any help I can get.

https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=210041
Call CPS and ask for Guardian ad Litem be assigned since mother refuses to get court ordered counseling for child. YOu cannot be compelled to have the disturbed child near your child. Neither should be in the middle of this adult drama.

 

[brightfuture]

There were several points mentioned here that I would like address.

The first being that I am not stupid. Having a problem, not knowing how to handle it or asking for help doesn't make me stupid. Also, my bf and his wife have been separated for almost 2 yrs now, the divorce was just heard 4 months ago. My bf does spend time with his son, but the boy's mother has said that he didn't do anything wrong and that he doesn't have to talk to him about it if he doesn't want to. She has told my bf that if he tries to talk to his son about these things she will not allow him to spend time with his son anymore. My not being with his father will not repair his parents marriage, so our not being together isn't the magic cure all here. This behavior is not directed solely towards my daughter. This boy has molested another boy in his home, thrown a chair at a teacher, described to his classmates in detail having anal and oral sex with a two year old, stabbed another child, the list goes on. I have contacted CPS in his county, but was told that they do not handle child on child allegations. I contacted the DA in his county, but no reply as of yet. I contacted the authorities in my area, but were told that they have no jurisdiction because the child lives out of state. The judge's order requiring therapy says that it has to begin within 14 days of the filing of the final judgment. As long as his mother does not sign and it is not filed no one is willing to step in. Just because his parents are going through a divorce, that does not entitle this child to inflict this kind of terror on others. As long as his mother continues to tell him things like it's ok to show people that he's mad because of the divorce, he'll just go on doing what he's doing to others, not just my daughter. No dr or facility will allow my bf to seek help for his son without the mother's(custodial parent)consent.

 

[stealth2]

See, all I see is that it's Mom's fault. It's not. Dad has just as much culpability. Does Dad have joint legal custody? If so, he should be speaking with a lawyer to see what he can legally do. But to simply say that the kid shouldn't be coming over? That's turning his back on his son. The kid is having problems getting through his parents' divorce. He is literally screaming for help. Both parents need to be helping him. Too bad neither of them seems willing/able to.

 

[brightfuture]

The mother has sole custody. I never said that it was all her fault. However, if a judge has ordered that the boy receive therapy and she does not get him that therapy, that is her fault. Being a mother myself I do understand that this child is having trouble coping with this divorce. I don't feel that he should be allowed to act out and harm others because of it. While I do feel sympathy for this child I will not allow him into my home, because as I said he has shown no remorse for what he did to my daughter. She was seriously injured as a result of what he did. I will not sacrifice her safety. My bf has in no way turned his back on his son. They spend a great deal of time together. However, there is more than one child to consider here. When telling everyone what he had done to my daugher this boy did say that he knew that it was wrong before he did it, but that he did it because he knew that she couldn't tell anyone. She can not speak, she is mentally disabled. I am in no way attempting to limit the time that my bf spends with his son, but I do not feel that it is wise to have him in my home where he might again harm my daughter.

When his father called to tell his mother what happened she said we had no right to reprimand him or even talk to him and if she felt he needed it, she would do it. She did not. His behavior is not her fault, but she should have some responsibility to help their son understand that there are consequences for his actions. I'm not seeking to punish him or keep him from his father, but I do want to protect my daughter and limit his contact with her until he gets help.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Then, by all means, keep your daughter in danger.

Yes, you are stupid. It means more to you to have a pickle tickle that to get rid of the problem. That's what this amounts to. Your daughter is your priority and, by keeping your boyfriend around, keeps your daughter in danger.

I had a feeling, and it was my intent, that my comment would bring you back to this thread. Also, as I thought, you'd be making excuses. You sure know how to make excuses, lady.

IAAL

 

[brightfuture]

For anyone who read my original question and responded with the intent to offer sincere assistance......thank you. For anyone else who may have responded simply to question my intelligence, to bash me or simply to toss in an imagined witty phrase here and there(pickle tickle.....please)thank you also for at least taking the time to respond to my query, no matter how juvenile and ridiculous your response may have been. I have found that quite a few who offer opinions here do so not with the intent of helping others, but anonymously and often immaturely jabbing and criticizing people who are genuinely in need of advice. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be the place to find it.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

For anyone who read my original question and responded with the intent to offer sincere assistance......thank you. For anyone else who may have responded simply to question my intelligence, to bash me or simply to toss in an imagined witty phrase here and there(pickle tickle.....please)thank you also for at least taking the time to respond to my query, no matter how juvenile and ridiculous your response may have been. I have found that quite a few who offer opinions here do so not with the intent of helping others, but anonymously and often immaturely jabbing and criticizing people who are genuinely in need of advice. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be the place to find it.

It is no one's fault but your own. You are the responsible figure (Or Not) in your daughters life. You then come back with this last post about sincere assistance?

Lady?......Your daughter was molested by your BOYFRIEND'S son. The answer is sincere, you just don't care enough about your daughter to see it.

 

[AHA]

For anyone who read my original question and responded with the intent to offer sincere assistance......thank you. For anyone else who may have responded simply to question my intelligence, to bash me or simply to toss in an imagined witty phrase here and there(pickle tickle.....please)thank you also for at least taking the time to respond to my query, no matter how juvenile and ridiculous your response may have been. I have found that quite a few who offer opinions here do so not with the intent of helping others, but anonymously and often immaturely jabbing and criticizing people who are genuinely in need of advice. Unfortunately, this does not seem to be the place to find it.

Posting personal stories on a public forum on the internet opens up for all kinds of replies. Anyone who can't take the good and the bad equally should stay away from the internet. The internet is not the posterboy for sweetness and cuddlyness.
Your story is about your daughter's safety, and for something that important, I sure wouldn't put all my hopes for a solution on an anonomous reply on an internet forum!! You need to have a serious talk with your bf, his ex and a lawyer. The boy is acting out because he's hurting badly, the fact that his involuntary choice of acting out is really destructive to others and not just to himself, could be because he can't get Mom's, Dad's and Stepmom's attention unless he does something serious. The boy is as innocent of all this as your daughter. You can't blame a kid for doing the only thing that will get his family to notice his existance. He's only 9 for christ's sake!! Help him instead of kicking him when he's already down.