Question about an annulment

[mistoffolees]

I think you need to see a therapist. Really.

Agreed. OP is creating problems that really don't exist.

 

[annalyn024]

Hmmm, I don't really think I need a therapist - I just have a conscience. I told the man that I had been seeing (I just broke it off) specifically that I had never been married, which I thought was true because of the annulment. Now that I know that I would have to say that I had had an annulment, even if he said, "Oh, I understand, it's no problem," I would always feel guilty about our whole relationship being founded on a lie. To have that constant nagging guilt on the back of my mind is not my idea of a pleasant way to live. Maybe some people, or even most people these days, don't think a thing about deceiving others, but I was raised to be an honest person in all things, even if it's painful, even if it costs me something near and dear to me. I hope no one here thinks I'm taking a shot at them or anything like that - I do appreciate the advice and everyone's comments, even the ones I don't agree with.
Thanks again

 

[ecmst12]

If your WHOLE RELATIONSHIP was only that statement that you had never been married, then yeah I guess you didn't have much to build a life on. But I kind of doubt that. How long had you even been seeing him? I'm seeing an inability to let things go, see things in perspective, and recognize what is important in a relationship and in life. Do you not realize that in a marriage, both of you will make mistakes and screw up MANY times? And you will have to forgive each other and yourselves for these mistakes? Because if you don't understand that, if you think the only choice is breaking up for any mistake, the word "marriage" should not even be crossing your mind. That's not what it's about.

 

[Zigner]

Different strokes for different folks...

 

[mistoffolees]

Hmmm, I don't really think I need a therapist - I just have a conscience. I told the man that I had been seeing (I just broke it off) specifically that I had never been married, which I thought was true because of the annulment. Now that I know that I would have to say that I had had an annulment, even if he said, "Oh, I understand, it's no problem," I would always feel guilty about our whole relationship being founded on a lie. To have that constant nagging guilt on the back of my mind is not my idea of a pleasant way to live. Maybe some people, or even most people these days, don't think a thing about deceiving others, but I was raised to be an honest person in all things, even if it's painful, even if it costs me something near and dear to me. I hope no one here thinks I'm taking a shot at them or anything like that - I do appreciate the advice and everyone's comments, even the ones I don't agree with.
Thanks again

And that's precisely why you need to see a therapist. A healthy person can admit their mistakes, make amends when necessary, and then put the mistakes behind them.