Question about extracurriculars

[ezmarelda]

This is what transpired.

I went through Unruly's backpack and found the paperwork. I asked her if she wanted to join Brownies, or if she'd talked to her dad about it. She said "It's on your days mom, it's not his problem."

As I was filling out the paperwork, I said (not to anyone, just out loud) "Grrr, I need stupidhead's signature"

Unruly overheard and said "That's your problem too. He's not signing any stupid form to make your life easier."

Sometimes I want to cry for your Kiddos...nobody should have to have Stupidhead as a father

That said, take it to court with you. I can't imagine him not signing a stupid form to make the judges life easier.

 

[MrsK]

The form reads this way:

"The child is under the care of:"

And then there are check boxes..

"Mother/Guardian" "Father/Guardian" "Other/Guardian (specify)" "Both Mother and Father"

I checked "Both Mother and Father" as we have joint-custody. I briefly considered checking "Mother/Guardian" since I have custody on MY days... but I felt like that was lying.



We're not allowed to use email. He won't respond to phone calls about the matter.

This is what transpired.

I went through Unruly's backpack and found the paperwork. I asked her if she wanted to join Brownies, or if she'd talked to her dad about it. She said "It's on your days mom, it's not his problem."

As I was filling out the paperwork, I said (not to anyone, just out loud) "Grrr, I need stupidhead's signature"

Unruly overheard and said "That's your problem too. He's not signing any stupid form to make your life easier."

Your ex is such a peach.

I'd check "Mother/Guardian" and if he ever makes a stink about it in court, I'd say "He refused to talk about it, let alone sign it, so I checked mother".

You arent REALLY lying, anyway. She is under YOUR care that day of the week.

But I would try bringing it up in court first...I think you'll get your way.

 

[Ohiogal]

TAKE the form with you to court. Once you are in front of the judge/referee (whatever they call them in your state), you can ask that an additional item be brought up. It really won't go well for stupidhead (man do I like that name.)

1. He signs it - okay, no drama.

2. He says, gee, all you had to do is ask. Here you'll document the number of times you requested.

3. He tells the referee that he won't sign it! Won't look good.

Okay Ginny where the heck have you been hiding? She is correct and definitely what i would suggest. Just mention to the judge that you need this form signed because your daughter really wants to participate and the fact that if he won't hear this issue you will come back yet again (poverty affidavits are nice if you can't afford the filing fee!). Which usually means the court will ask what are you talking about. You state about the form, they turn to dad and dad answers one way or another.

 

[CJane]

Okay Ginny where the heck have you been hiding? She is correct and definitely what i would suggest. Just mention to the judge that you need this form signed because your daughter really wants to participate and the fact that if he won't hear this issue you will come back yet again (poverty affidavits are nice if you can't afford the filing fee!). Which usually means the court will ask what are you talking about. You state about the form, they turn to dad and dad answers one way or another.

Ok. I'll take the forms with if he doesn't answer a phone call between now and then.

'Nother question that's not worth starting a new thread for...

He has to be served no fewer than 5 days before the hearing date. I believe the deadline is tomorrow (court is Monday)... I'm going to call in the morning and find out if he's been served and they just haven't updated the website, but if he's not served in time, what happens?

 

[Ohiogal]

Ok. I'll take the forms with if he doesn't answer a phone call between now and then.

'Nother question that's not worth starting a new thread for...

He has to be served no fewer than 5 days before the hearing date. I believe the deadline is tomorrow (court is Monday)... I'm going to call in the morning and find out if he's been served and they just haven't updated the website, but if he's not served in time, what happens?

Show up and hope he shows up. If not then a new hearing date is set.

 

[wileybunch]

She said "It's on your days mom, it's not his problem."

As I was filling out the paperwork, I said (not to anyone, just out loud) "Grrr, I need stupidhead's signature"

Unruly overheard and said "That's your problem too. He's not signing any stupid form to make your life easier."

GASP!!!! I was going to finally ask why you refer to her as "Unruly", but I think this answers it!!!

OK, now WHO wants to join Brownies again??

A little speechless here your daughter speaks to you that way. Grr...

 

[wileybunch]

He has to be served no fewer than 5 days before the hearing date. I believe the deadline is tomorrow (court is Monday)...

Wouldn't 5 days be Mon 9/17 if court is Mon 9/24?

 

[Ohiogal]

Wouldn't 5 days be Mon 9/17 if court is Mon 9/24?

no... that is SEVEN days.

 

[CJane]

GASP!!!! I was going to finally ask why you refer to her as "Unruly", but I think this answers it!!!

OK, now WHO wants to join Brownies again??

A little speechless here your daughter speaks to you that way. Grr...

That's actually how I know that it's a direct quote from the ex. Unruly NEVER speaks to me that way, is a very respectful and well behaved little girl - unless she's quoting her father.

The kids are Wild and Unruly because of the Dixie Chicks song "Cowboy Take Me Away"... "I wanna grow something Wild and Unruly"

I have another question...

My life has been VERY peaceful the past year or so that there have been restraining orders against me. Keeps SMom away from me and keeps exchanges public and keeps Stupidhead from instigating altercations... but those restraining orders expire in a couple of weeks... is it possible to request that they be extended or even made permanent? I know it's odd as the person they're against to be requesting something like that, but you wouldn't believe how much easier it's made my life and my kids' lives.

If I can't do it at this hearing, can i do it at all?

If I can't do it at all, can I request - at this hearing - that a permanent modification/adendum be added to the parenting plan to require public exchanges?

EDIT:

Just spoke to the Sheriff's department. They show the service is 'valid' until the 19th and that stupidhead has not been served yet, but that the server worked over the weekend and just hasn't turned in his paperwork yet.

Stupidhead was VERY 'normal' (for him) at the exchange Sunday night, so I was assuming he hadn't been served yet... again, no cats nailed to my front door...

 

[Zephyr]

That's actually how I know that it's a direct quote from the ex. Unruly NEVER speaks to me that way, is a very respectful and well behaved little girl - unless she's quoting her father.

The kids are Wild and Unruly because of the Dixie Chicks song "Cowboy Take Me Away"... "I wanna grow something Wild and Unruly"

I have another question...

My life has been VERY peaceful the past year or so that there have been restraining orders against me. Keeps SMom away from me and keeps exchanges public and keeps Stupidhead from instigating altercations... but those restraining orders expire in a couple of weeks... is it possible to request that they be extended or even made permanent? I know it's odd as the person they're against to be requesting something like that, but you wouldn't believe how much easier it's made my life and my kids' lives.

If I can't do it at this hearing, can i do it at all?

If I can't do it at all, can I request - at this hearing - that a permanent modification/adendum be added to the parenting plan to require public exchanges?

EDIT:

Just spoke to the Sheriff's department. They show the service is 'valid' until the 19th and that stupidhead has not been served yet, but that the server worked over the weekend and just hasn't turned in his paperwork yet.

Stupidhead was VERY 'normal' (for him) at the exchange Sunday night, so I was assuming he hadn't been served yet... again, no cats nailed to my front door...

it just makes me chuckle the way that sentance is worded.....

 

[CJane]

it just makes me chuckle the way that sentance is worded.....

I know, right? It makes ME chuckle... especially the fact that I'm thinking about asking that the court continue to find me a 'danger' to SMom. LOL

It's one reason I shouldn't post in the DV forum... all those people fighting restraining orders... it's amazing how much drama ended the day they removed her from my radar.

 

[casa]

I know, right? It makes ME chuckle... especially the fact that I'm thinking about asking that the court continue to find me a 'danger' to SMom. LOL

It's one reason I shouldn't post in the DV forum... all those people fighting restraining orders... it's amazing how much drama ended the day they removed her from my radar.

CJane, this is what I did: When the RO was going to be up on nuttyX, I told the judge how much calmer/easier drop off & pick up had been since designating a public spot. I asked that the arrangement continue...and reiterated it was also 'fair' re; distance traveled & transportation/fuel costs. It's part of the permanent order & it IS more peaceful the last couple of years! (He's still obnoxious & irritating, but now he has to do it from further away. LOL)

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

I can say that the drama in my life can be attributable about 85% to my ex's girlfriend - and GF's mother. I nearly had to get a restaining order for her (and mom)!

Is it possible to maintain the public exchange WITHOUT the restraining order? Also, if the SM emails you, and you politely answer back that all communications are between you and dad, you could reverse the RO.

 

[CJane]

Is it possible to maintain the public exchange WITHOUT the restraining order? Also, if the SM emails you, and you politely answer back that all communications are between you and dad, you could reverse the RO.

Well, right now, the public exchange is part of the RO. The actual parenting plan states p/u and d/o is at each parent's house. I REALLY don't want to go back to picking up at his house out in the boonies.

Neither of them email me. The internet is evil.

When SMom has spoken to me (once in the past year) I simply smile, nod and walk away.

When X gets stupid in person or on the phone, I say "You have a nice night too. I'll talk to you soon." and hang up.

 

[wileybunch]

no... that is SEVEN days.

Oh, interesting because when husband's ex had 10 days to file a response to his contempt motion, she responded right at the 2-week mark which I assumed was because she had 10 *court days* to respond.