re: car insurance for 16 year old living with mom

[spidey225]

re: car insurance for 16 year old living with mom

What is the name of your state?undefinedWhat is the name of your state?Michigan
We pay a lot of money in child support for just one child, and now that she is driving, mom wants us to pay child support as well as car insurance. This would add $200/ month to our child support. She says if we don't pay it she will take us to court and force us to pay it. Can she do this? I would think since she has chosen to be custodial parent it is her responsibility to pay the insurance as she gets plenty of money from us and should be well able to pay the car insurance. As it is now, the money we give her pays her house payment and car payment, leaving her with her healthy income to pay for groceries, utilities, etc. Jessica knows she is welcome to come and stay with us and we would gladly pay it if she did, but her mom is manipulative and tells her if she moves in with us, she would not be able to survive without the child support. Mom is threatening court daily, we need help!!

 

[BelizeBreeze]

What is the name of your state?undefinedWhat is the name of your state?Michigan
We pay a lot of money in child support for just one child, and now that she is driving, mom wants us to pay child support as well as car insurance. This would add $200/ month to our child support. She says if we don't pay it she will take us to court and force us to pay it. Can she do this? I would think since she has chosen to be custodial parent it is her responsibility to pay the insurance as she gets plenty of money from us and should be well able to pay the car insurance. As it is now, the money we give her pays her house payment and car payment, leaving her with her healthy income to pay for groceries, utilities, etc. Jessica knows she is welcome to come and stay with us and we would gladly pay it if she did, but her mom is manipulative and tells her if she moves in with us, she would not be able to survive without the child support. Mom is threatening court daily, we need help!!

Tell MOM to go right ahead and file. And tell your daughter to get a job.

 

[CO19]

http://www.secondwivesclub.com[/url]

 

[nextwife]

http://www.secondwivesclub.com[/url]

Irrelevant. A personal car is NOT a necessity for a SIXTEEN YEAR OLD (IMHO, it's a recipe for disaster). If dad was not in on the decision to have a 16 year old have their own car, it's up to mom to figure out how to insure it, since she thinks the kid needs to have it. A car is NOT a "need" for a CHILD. If kiddo wants a car, let kiddo work to pay for the insurance, just as I and my husband did when we were in college (neither of us had our own cars in HS and were in no way "deprived")

 

[stealth2]

Exactly. Both of my kids already know that if they want to drive, they'd better be able to pay for insurance themselves. I do have an old Cherokee that I'm keeping for them to use (heh - better learn to drive a stick, kiddos!), but they'll responsible for keeping it in running shape and insured.

 

[ablessin]

I love how moms throw that phrase around, I'll take you to court -
Problem is, too many dad's fall for it, so they bend over backwards to rectify the situation!!!

There is nothing in the law that says car insurance has to paid by either parent, let alone be paid in addition to child support.

If your daughter wants to drive, she needs to take some responsibility in the matter..... that means pitching in for the insurance. Kids are more likely to be consious about their actions when it's their money anyway.

 

[VeronicaGia]

Tell her to go pound sand.

 

[spidey225]

http://www.secondwivesclub.com[/url]

You might want to know that MY ex husband owes me $72,000 in back CS, so my current husband's ex is lucky to have a man who fulfills his obligation. Unfortunately your perception is off, I am not a bitter "step" poster, you have no clue of the history, such as when he first divorced her, even though the court order stated he got the trailer since she was living with her parents, he let her stay there because she begged him to let her while he stayed with a buddy. The trailer was full of brand new $4000 worth of furniture which was financed in my husband's name. She sold all the furniture for pennies on the dollar behind his back, he had to continue to make payments on furniture he no longer had. She also promised him she wouldn't raise the CS if he went out and bought a house instead of staying in the trailer. He bought a house, the day after he moved in, she took him to court and raised CS. He struggled for years after that. There are many, many more instances of things like this, I won't go into all of them. Even my husband says she is all about the money, and he predicts the day his daughter turns 18 mom will kick her out because she won't be making money off her. I've only been married to him for a year, and he has been divorced from her for 14 years, and he is the one who tells me all the things she has done. So don't judge others so quickly when you have no idea of the whole story. You would be unhappy too if your ex treated you like yesterday's garbage and, as my husband puts it, "I am just her money source, that's all I am. I have no say in the way my daughter is raised, I just provide the funds."

 

[babymakesone]

When my H went to modification, the ex wanted him to pay car insurance on the 3 oldest kids. He told the ex & the mediator that if the kids were old enough to drive, that they were old enough to work. The mediator looked at the ex & told her that he doesn't have to pay car insurance; that is what her child support is for. Yes, she has tried to bring it up every time there is a modification, but the mediator tells her the same thing every time - if she wants to pay for their car insurance, that is to come out of the child support.

 

[stargazer0725]

Not to beat anybody up or anything, because it sounds like the CP really likes her child support, but the OP's original post touches a wee bit on the wrong side of blackmail...not willing to contribute to auto insurance as long as the daughter is living with the CP, but come on over to our house and we'll fork out the cash???

Since there seems to be some agreement to the fact the the daughter needs to be insured to drive, couldn't some form of compromise be drawn up. Something to the effect that daughter gets a job and pays for 1/3 (since driving is a privilege), CP pays for 1/3 and NCP pays for 1/3. And there's no rule that says NCP's payments need to go through the CP...pay the insurance company directly if they don't want to put money in the other parent's hand.

Ignore the court threats and try to work out what's best for the girl.

 

[betterthanher]

Not to beat anybody up or anything, because it sounds like the CP really likes her child support, but the OP's original post touches a wee bit on the wrong side of blackmail...not willing to contribute to auto insurance as long as the daughter is living with the CP, but come on over to our house and we'll fork out the cash???

Since there seems to be some agreement to the fact the the daughter needs to be insured to drive, couldn't some form of compromise be drawn up. Something to the effect that daughter gets a job and pays for 1/3 (since driving is a privilege), CP pays for 1/3 and NCP pays for 1/3. And there's no rule that says NCP's payments need to go through the CP...pay the insurance company directly if they don't want to put money in the other parent's hand.

Ignore the court threats and try to work out what's best for the girl.

There is no compromise. If a kid wants to drive, then the kid needs to be responsible and get a job to pay for insurance and license fees and gas. Can't pay 'em, then you ain't driving.

OP...tell your ex psycho to file. Then when she loses, file paperwork against her for abuse of court system (or whatever it's called).

 

[bononos]

I love how moms throw that phrase around, I'll take you to court -
Problem is, too many dad's fall for it, so they bend over backwards to rectify the situation!!!

There is nothing in the law that says car insurance has to paid by either parent, let alone be paid in addition to child support.

If your daughter wants to drive, she needs to take some responsibility in the matter..... that means pitching in for the insurance. Kids are more likely to be consious about their actions when it's their money anyway.

And men NEVER do that sort of thing, huh?

 

[haiku]

Not to beat anybody up or anything, because it sounds like the CP really likes her child support, but the OP's original post touches a wee bit on the wrong side of blackmail...not willing to contribute to auto insurance as long as the daughter is living with the CP, but come on over to our house and we'll fork out the cash???

Since there seems to be some agreement to the fact the the daughter needs to be insured to drive, couldn't some form of compromise be drawn up. Something to the effect that daughter gets a job and pays for 1/3 (since driving is a privilege), CP pays for 1/3 and NCP pays for 1/3. And there's no rule that says NCP's payments need to go through the CP...pay the insurance company directly if they don't want to put money in the other parent's hand.

Ignore the court threats and try to work out what's best for the girl.

As an NCP spouse, I can think of a whole lotta reasons why that statement is NOT blackmail.

having a minor child who is a driver can create huge liabilities....If I am foooting the bill for it, I might want them under my roof, so I have some control over the situation, never mind it might be possible for me to secure better insurance for the child etc.....

 

[ablessin]

You might want to know that MY ex husband owes me $72,000 in back CS, so my current husband's ex is lucky to have a man who fulfills his obligation. Unfortunately your perception is off, I am not a bitter "step" poster, you have no clue of the history, such as when he first divorced her, even though the court order stated he got the trailer since she was living with her parents, he let her stay there because she begged him to let her while he stayed with a buddy. The trailer was full of brand new $4000 worth of furniture which was financed in my husband's name. She sold all the furniture for pennies on the dollar behind his back, he had to continue to make payments on furniture he no longer had. She also promised him she wouldn't raise the CS if he went out and bought a house instead of staying in the trailer. He bought a house, the day after he moved in, she took him to court and raised CS. He struggled for years after that. There are many, many more instances of things like this, I won't go into all of them. Even my husband says she is all about the money, and he predicts the day his daughter turns 18 mom will kick her out because she won't be making money off her. I've only been married to him for a year, and he has been divorced from her for 14 years, and he is the one who tells me all the things she has done. So don't judge others so quickly when you have no idea of the whole story. You would be unhappy too if your ex treated you like yesterday's garbage and, as my husband puts it, "I am just her money source, that's all I am. I have no say in the way my daughter is raised, I just provide the funds."

Oh, you have hit the nail on the head. And I ask, WHY does it have to be like that?????!!!!!!!!!
He knows he is the money machine for his ex, and I think it makes his blood boil. But what can you do? Can't quit your job! Right now, he pays so much in CS, if I was not in the picture, he'd have to live at home with his parents.... he could never afford to have an apartment on what he actually gets to "keep"........she literally gets 1/2 his check -- on a good week... I have seen weeks where she is getting well more than 1/2- - - I think since he gets paid by the mile, and his check varies, his CS obilgation should be a WEEKLY percentage..... NOT a fixed $$ amount.
Now, she signed the kids up for sports and expects us to drive them all over creation on the weekend....she lives like not even 5 minutes from school, we live at least 20- - -
And I KNOW that can be done, because how many of us have a retirement % taken out of our paycheck - - - mine is.....
It varies.... If I work overtime, my deduction is more.

At any rate - the car insurance... NO - he has already told his son, I am not insuring you and I am not giving your mother money towards insurance either. Both of us (maybe her too) had to "fend for ourself" when we got a car - - so he can too....... he works.
Kids need to learn a little responsibilty, not have everything handed to them!
Maybe help a little but come on....... Mom and Dad should not feel obligated for paying every little thing that comes along.

Some - and I say SOME - -women will soak the man for every bloody penny.

 

[username43]

Plenty of parents are glad when their teen begins driving.Not me.. I always enjoyed driving mine around. But in larger families they can help shuttle siblings to activities and get themselves to and from school. Which has to be admitted helps working parents out.

In this case parents should kick in and at least pay the majority of the insurance/gas/payments.

There is responsibility to be learned in alot of things but, any time a parent doesn't want to pay for something they always harp "it teaches responsibiliy to pay for it yourself"