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kik1999

Member
What is the name of your state? Ohio

Brief history: I have sole legal and physical custody of my daughter since divorce. Ex threatened to sue for joint (which I have no problem with) legal and joint physical (which most stated would not happen due to distance between us and no significant changes in circumstance). Well, actually he is remarried almost 3 years ago, does that constitute a change in circumstance?

In any event, the main purpose for this is he wants to have the tax deduction every other year and lower child support (what he doesn't realize is that since the divorce, my income has only increased by $5k, and his has increased about $17k - however, he does have another child with his wife, will that change anything?). CS is set at $387/month currently. I received an "Addendum Withholding Notice To Parties To A Support Order" from the CS Enf. Agency today. It is asking for all of the "obligor's" change in information financially. Being the cp, I am not the obligor, but the obligee. The second section is to be filled out by the obligee. The check box options given only outline reasons to STOP cs and/or alimony (which is n/a). Obviously since my child is 6, I have no intent to fill this part out for another 12 years or so! :p

What am I supposed to do with this form? I plan on calling the agency on Monday, but of course, I'm thinking the wosrt....this is a sign that he is following through on his threats to get joint custody. Joint legal is something I support 100%...have no problem agreeing to that!! However, joint physical, IMO (which I know doesn't mean squat), would be difficult for a 6 year old who is thriving educationally, emotionally, etc. in our circumstance. He lives 40 miles away, not in the same school district and he mentioned that he would like one week with him, one week with me (great for close by, not so great for 80 mile round trip every day of the week). Since I didn't file for a modification, I'm assuming this form means that he did (cs only, or possible custody to follow?). I'm terrified once again!! :eek:

Sorry if this is hard to follow, here are my questions:

1. What should I do with this form, since none of the information is applicable to me, as the obligee.
2. Will his child with his new wife decrease the amount of support factored for my daughter?
3. I know you can't predict, but is this normal to be sent if a modification to custody was filed?

I hate that this is happening over money. I have said before, I would give up cs, tax decductions, pay for her insurance, cover all expenses, etc. if it meant that my little girl would live with me as the primary residence forever. He chose to live out of the state until she was 4, and I am thrilled that he has returned b/c she deserves to have her father in her life. I am so supportive of their relationship. However, since he DID choose to remain absent, her and I are extremely close. Losing time with her would devistate me!! He does get standard visitation. One (overnight) during the week and eow, with weekends ending on Monday morning, not Sunday afternoon. Thanks in advance for the help and I'm sorry this is long. I'm freaking out here!What is the name of your state?
 


M

MominMass

Guest
1. Take it with you to court on assigned date along with your financial information and ask family court officer to show you how to fill it out.
I don't believe any financial orders can be made without parties present.


2. NO

3. Don't assume anything. Wait to be served motion for modification and respond accordingly. You can always call the court and ask if any motions have been filed recently in your case.

Father has reasonable visitation. I would fight any attempt at change in custody arguing that there has been no significant change in circumstances, and your child is thriving with the current arrangement.
 

kik1999

Member
Thank you MominMass

However, there is no date on the notice. Just the date of the letter. It states to fill out and return via mail. In which case, I'm confused on what I am supposed to fill out. Nothing on this document is applicable to me (section one is for the obligor - not me, and section two is for the obligee to fill out for termination of cs - not gonna happen!:p ). I did some searching online, it may be that he simply requested a review and this is what they sent me as a result. It has been more than 3 years since our current order was set. Both of us had had job changes since the original decree, but it never stated for ME to notify them of a change, only him. And since my income amount hasn't changed more than 2% per year, I'm not quite sure that they know my current employer. Kind of worried about that one....

On the CSEA website, it states that these reviews are to be done without either of us present, and the decision will be sent to us via First Class mail. We will have the right to appeal the decision, if so desired. However, how can they make a decision without my income information. As I stated, the form I received ONLY asks for information about the obligor and termination of cs request.

Thank you for your response. It has eased my mind in regards to a change in primary residence. All of the other things are petty in comparison, IMO. My gut tells me the only reason why he's even entertaining the idea of joint physical is to reduce the amount in cs. Sad, but true. He's never showed an interest in changing custody until I explained that he couldn't claim her on his taxes this year, as our divorce decree states I claim her every year.
 
kik1999 said:
2. Will his child with his new wife decrease the amount of support factored for my daughter?
MominMass, you say NO... are you sure? The reason why I ask is because my state child support calculator does give credit for other children living in the home... it's not substantial, but it does give it.

Is that something that that only certain states do?

Regardless, any credit he IS given for children with his present wife will be canceled out because his income has increased so substantially.
 

kik1999

Member
NCP Dad in TN said:
MominMass, you say NO... are you sure? The reason why I ask is because my state child support calculator does give credit for other children living in the home... it's not substantial, but it does give it.

Is that something that that only certain states do?

Regardless, any credit he IS given for children with his present wife will be canceled out because his income has increased so substantially.

I thought it only took into consideration if he was paying any cs for another child. Not the ones that live with him. From what I've read here (and I quote from another thread) "his main obligation is cs for this child. Shouldn't be having more kids if he can't support the one he has." Is that correct in Ohio, or just in certain states?
 
M

MominMass

Guest
NCP Dad in TN said:
MominMass, you say NO... are you sure? The reason why I ask is because my state child support calculator does give credit for other children living in the home... it's not substantial, but it does give it.

Is that something that that only certain states do?

Regardless, any credit he IS given for children with his present wife will be canceled out because his income has increased so substantially.

I could be wrong about Ohio calculations, but as you say, it's not substantial.
Generally support orders do not decrease just because the dopes who cannot support one child continue to have more children**************
 
M

MominMass

Guest
kik1999 said:
However, there is no date on the notice. Just the date of the letter. It states to fill out and return via mail. In which case, I'm confused on what I am supposed to fill out. Nothing on this document is applicable to me (section one is for the obligor - not me, and section two is for the obligee to fill out for termination of cs - not gonna happen!:p ). I did some searching online, it may be that he simply requested a review and this is what they sent me as a result. It has been more than 3 years since our current order was set. Both of us had had job changes since the original decree, but it never stated for ME to notify them of a change, only him. And since my income amount hasn't changed more than 2% per year, I'm not quite sure that they know my current employer. Kind of worried about that one....

On the CSEA website, it states that these reviews are to be done without either of us present, and the decision will be sent to us via First Class mail. We will have the right to appeal the decision, if so desired. However, how can they make a decision without my income information. As I stated, the form I received ONLY asks for information about the obligor and termination of cs request.

Thank you for your response. It has eased my mind in regards to a change in primary residence. All of the other things are petty in comparison, IMO. My gut tells me the only reason why he's even entertaining the idea of joint physical is to reduce the amount in cs. Sad, but true. He's never showed an interest in changing custody until I explained that he couldn't claim her on his taxes this year, as our divorce decree states I claim her every year.
If it eases your mind further, know that courts generally see through attempts to modify custody for financial purposes. Call the clerk/registrar whatever their called in Ohio, and ask how to fill out the form.
 

kik1999

Member
MominMass said:
I could be wrong about Ohio calculations, but as you say, it's not substantial.
Generally support orders do not decrease just because the dopes who cannot support one child continue to have more children**************

Dope is an understatement. He now has a sd b/c his new wifie has a kid, and wants to adopt her too. I admit, I thought it was admirable at first, but why can't she hold the bio-dad of that kid responsible? Irks me to no end. Meanwhile, I went without cs for 4 years, and when it finally does kick in (at a measley $387/month), he wants it lowered b/c he has more obligations now. Obligations that he took on himself....so now my daughter has to suffer? Nevermind the fact that she suffered for 4 years when he was running around deciding if he even wanted to be a father in the first place!! Ugh!
 

kik1999

Member
MominMass said:
If it eases your mind further, know that courts generally see through attempts to modify custody for financial purposes. Call the clerk/registrar whatever their called in Ohio, and ask how to fill out the form.
I will do that first thing on Monday morning. In the meantime, thank you for the reassuring thoughts. I'll be able to sleep until then! I know this seems petty for me to worry over, when I've seen people with much greater problems on this site. But, I honestly do not think that his idea of joint physical custody is in ANY way shape or form, beneficial to my daughter. Why fix if it isn't broken? And I'm horrified that our once beyond amicable reationship is now ruined over this.
 
M

MominMass

Guest
kik1999 said:
Dope is an understatement. He now has a sd b/c his new wifie has a kid, and wants to adopt her too. I admit, I thought it was admirable at first, but why can't she hold the bio-dad of that kid responsible? Irks me to no end. Meanwhile, I went without cs for 4 years, and when it finally does kick in (at a measley $387/month), he wants it lowered b/c he has more obligations now. Obligations that he took on himself....so now my daughter has to suffer? Nevermind the fact that she suffered for 4 years when he was running around deciding if he even wanted to be a father in the first place!! Ugh!

In your initial post you said you would give up all the financial compensation just to retain the custody you now have. If Dad's income has increased by 17k per year, I don't see his support obligation being lowered. If anything, wouldn't it be increased? Check Ohio guidelines, but in Massachusetts the calculation gets higher as the child gets older. I wouldn't worry a whole lot about any of this, Ohio girl. Now go make some of those little buckeyes with the peanut butter and chocolate. Enjoy with your favorite beverage and perhaps an old movie**************......
 
MominMass said:
I could be wrong about Ohio calculations, but as you say, it's not substantial.
Generally support orders do not decrease just because the dopes who cannot support one child continue to have more children**************
Ummm... I really don't consider myself a "dope" simply because I get credit for children I have had after my divorce. After all, my child support has not been reduced, even though I have my kids 46% of the year. I have not petitioned for the reduction. I'm still paying as if I have EOW (standard in TN). Just an FYI... not all NCP's who take advantage of the breaks the gov't gives them (which are FEW) are DOPES. :)
 

ceara19

Senior Member
NCP Dad in TN said:
Ummm... I really don't consider myself a "dope" simply because I get credit for children I have had after my divorce. After all, my child support has not been reduced, even though I have my kids 46% of the year. I have not petitioned for the reduction. I'm still paying as if I have EOW (standard in TN). Just an FYI... not all NCP's who take advantage of the breaks the gov't gives them (which are FEW) are DOPES. :)
Unfortunately they are few and far between. Deadbeat dad's give good dad's, like yourself, a bad name. Just like greedy, vindictive mother's, give the rest of us a bad rap.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
kik1999 said:
What is the name of your state? Ohio

Brief history: I have sole legal and physical custody of my daughter since divorce. Ex threatened to sue for joint (which I have no problem with) legal and joint physical (which most stated would not happen due to distance between us and no significant changes in circumstance). Well, actually he is remarried almost 3 years ago, does that constitute a change in circumstance?

yes that constitutes a change in circumstances.

In any event, the main purpose for this is he wants to have the tax deduction every other year and lower child support (what he doesn't realize is that since the divorce, my income has only increased by $5k, and his has increased about $17k - however, he does have another child with his wife, will that change anything?). CS is set at $387/month currently. I received an "Addendum Withholding Notice To Parties To A Support Order" from the CS Enf. Agency today. It is asking for all of the "obligor's" change in information financially. Being the cp, I am not the obligor, but the obligee. The second section is to be filled out by the obligee. The check box options given only outline reasons to STOP cs and/or alimony (which is n/a). Obviously since my child is 6, I have no intent to fill this part out for another 12 years or so! :p

What am I supposed to do with this form? I plan on calling the agency on Monday, but of course, I'm thinking the wosrt....this is a sign that he is following through on his threats to get joint custody. Joint legal is something I support 100%...have no problem agreeing to that!! However, joint physical, IMO (which I know doesn't mean squat), would be difficult for a 6 year old who is thriving educationally, emotionally, etc. in our circumstance. He lives 40 miles away, not in the same school district and he mentioned that he would like one week with him, one week with me (great for close by, not so great for 80 mile round trip every day of the week). Since I didn't file for a modification, I'm assuming this form means that he did (cs only, or possible custody to follow?). I'm terrified once again!! :eek:

Sorry if this is hard to follow, here are my questions:

1. What should I do with this form, since none of the information is applicable to me, as the obligee.

Do what the others have suggested.

2. Will his child with his new wife decrease the amount of support factored for my daughter?
Look at this section of the Ohio Code:
§ 3119.22. Deviation from amount resulting from schedule and worksheet.




The court may order an amount of child support that deviates from the amount of child support that would otherwise result from the use of the basic child support schedule and the applicable worksheet, through the line establishing the actual annual obligation, if, after considering the factors and criteria set forth in section 3119.23 of the Revised Code, the court determines that the amount calculated pursuant to the basic child support schedule and the applicable worksheet, through the line establishing the actual annual obligation, would be unjust or inappropriate and would not be in the best interest of the child.


If it deviates, the court must enter in the journal the amount of child support calculated pursuant to the basic child support schedule and the applicable worksheet, through the line establishing the actual annual obligation, its determination that that amount would be unjust or inappropriate and would not be in the best interest of the child, and findings of fact supporting that determination.


The reasons for a deviation are as follows:
The court may consider any of the following factors in determining whether to grant a deviation pursuant to section 3119.22 of the Revised Code:





(A) Special and unusual needs of the children;





(B) Extraordinary obligations for minor children or obligations for handicapped children who are not stepchildren and who are not offspring from the marriage or relationship that is the basis of the immediate child support determination;





(C) Other court-ordered payments;





(D) Extended parenting time or extraordinary costs associated with parenting time, provided that this division does not authorize and shall not be construed as authorizing any deviation from the schedule and the applicable worksheet, through the line establishing the actual annual obligation, or any escrowing, impoundment, or withholding of child support because of a denial of or interference with a right of parenting time granted by court order;





(E) The obligor obtaining additional employment after a child support order is issued in order to support a second family;





(F) The financial resources and the earning ability of the child;





(G) Disparity in income between parties or households;





(H) Benefits that either parent receives from remarriage or sharing living expenses with another person;





(I) The amount of federal, state, and local taxes actually paid or estimated to be paid by a parent or both of the parents;





(J) Significant in-kind contributions from a parent, including, but not limited to, direct payment for lessons, sports equipment, schooling, or clothing;





(K) The relative financial resources, other assets and resources, and needs of each parent;





(L) The standard of living and circumstances of each parent and the standard of living the child would have enjoyed had the marriage continued or had the parents been married;





(M) The physical and emotional condition and needs of the child;





(N) The need and capacity of the child for an education and the educational opportunities that would have been available to the child had the circumstances requiring a court order for support not arisen;





(O) The responsibility of each parent for the support of others;





(P) Any other relevant factor.




The court may accept an agreement of the parents that assigns a monetary value to any of the factors and criteria listed in this section that are applicable to their situation.





If the court grants a deviation based on division (P) of this section, it shall specifically state in the order the facts that are the basis for the deviation.






HISTORY: 148 v S 180. Eff 3-22-2001.








3. I know you can't predict, but is this normal to be sent if a modification to custody was filed?

I hate that this is happening over money. I have said before, I would give up cs, tax decductions, pay for her insurance, cover all expenses, etc. if it meant that my little girl would live with me as the primary residence forever. He chose to live out of the state until she was 4, and I am thrilled that he has returned b/c she deserves to have her father in her life. I am so supportive of their relationship. However, since he DID choose to remain absent, her and I are extremely close. Losing time with her would devistate me!! He does get standard visitation. One (overnight) during the week and eow, with weekends ending on Monday morning, not Sunday afternoon. Thanks in advance for the help and I'm sorry this is long. I'm freaking out here!What is the name of your state?

Try this link:
http://www.alllaw.com/calculators/Childsupport/ohio/
 

kik1999

Member
MominMass said:
In your initial post you said you would give up all the financial compensation just to retain the custody you now have. If Dad's income has increased by 17k per year, I don't see his support obligation being lowered. If anything, wouldn't it be increased? Check Ohio guidelines, but in Massachusetts the calculation gets higher as the child gets older. I wouldn't worry a whole lot about any of this, Ohio girl. Now go make some of those little buckeyes with the peanut butter and chocolate. Enjoy with your favorite beverage and perhaps an old movie**************......
Thank you, MominMass. Like I said, I don't care about his support payment being lowered to nothing; although, I'm not going to cheat her out of what she is entitled to. My (selfish) first concern is my daughter being with me. I have no problem with her having a relationship w/her father. I encourage it. She needs and deserves it. I want her to live with me. That may be selfish, but she has thrived in this enviornment. And I hate to say it, but it is by NO fault of his own, meaning, he can't take a damn bit of credit for the most part. He hasn't put in the efffort. Nor do I think he wants to. It's all about money, and the least amount that he can get away with.

Sorry for venting. I get passionate about this whole thing. He CHOSE to live in a separate state. And his family (who lives here), didn't even acknowledge her existance until she was 4, is NOW pushing him into trying to "get" custody. It has nothing to do with what is in her best interest. How do they even KNOW what is in her best interest? They (his family, including himself) barely know her at all. Its all about who can win, and who will lose. They are not thinking about my daughter at all. I have supported a relationship with her and her father, no matter what he has put me through, and believe me, it was a lot. He is an alcoholic, DV, etc. Supported a relationship with the new stepmom and siblings. And this is the thanks I get..."we want to claim her on our taxes, we want to lower cs, we think you got "lucky" and we want to try to change the unfair judgement", which BTW, he agreed to back at the time of our divorce - we shared an attorney. The fact of the matter is, I did get "lucky". I got a life with my child. Something that no matter what the courts diivy up; he missed out on for almost 5 years. And despite all of this, I'm actually sad for HIM. If he would look beyond his checkbook and really WANT time with her, I might agree to it out of court. But this money thing really ticks me off. There are millions of people who would give anything in the world to have children. And some of the people who do have kids, think of them as a dollar amount that they "have" to pay.

Ok, now for that glass of wine...;)
 

kik1999

Member
NCP Dad in TN said:
Ummm... I really don't consider myself a "dope" simply because I get credit for children I have had after my divorce. After all, my child support has not been reduced, even though I have my kids 46% of the year. I have not petitioned for the reduction. I'm still paying as if I have EOW (standard in TN). Just an FYI... not all NCP's who take advantage of the breaks the gov't gives them (which are FEW) are DOPES. :)
No, no, no....I don't think all dads or ncps for that matter, are dopes. I actually LIVE with my bf who has custody of his daughter. Actually, the mother of his child gave up custody to him so she could "party" and live life (she's 34 btw, not a little girl who had a child). But, if you knew the whole story behind this...my little girl is VERY bright. Reads and does math at a 4th grade level - she is 6! She is doing EXCELLENT in school, both from an educational and social aspect. She is VERY well adjusted, despite being from a divorced family. He has told educators and professionals that it is because of me and the time that I have dedicated to her - despite the fact that I was 20 and on a bad track when I got pregnant. The day I found out I was pregnant with her, I was in the worst shape of my life. I was on a downhill slope fast!! I shaped up, had her, went back to college and now am a tutor for our community (have won 5 awards at work for community service), have a great job, live in a wonderful neighborhood and am a very dedicated parent.

It kills me that there could even be a possiblilty that my daughter's life could be turned upside-down b/c he wants to "get out of" cs...for what HE thinks is too much. The fact of the matter is, if he had any idea what was spent in raising her, he would be grateful that he only had to spend $387/month. Last year, I spent $10k in child care alone for her. This is for a school-aged child. He has no idea. And I'm one of the rare cp (not on this site, just in general) who understands how important it is for a child to have both parents in their lives consistently. However, my fear with his idea of a joint custody schedule....one week at his house, one week at mine, etc....I'm afraid she will lose her "security" when it comes to where she belongs. Can you imagine as an adult how confusing it would be to live one week at one house, one week at another? I don't want her to lose her security, sense of belonging, all over a couple of hundred dollars. :mad:
 
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