Relocateing

[Jennx1032]

What is the name of your state?New York State, My name is Jenn

I have some questions on relocateing, I have full cust. and my soon to be ex husband has parenting time every other weekend. I am engaged to a military man, who is now overseas. We want to all be together when he comes home, he has three years left in and i can't imagine being apart for 3 years. Also we can't live her, it is too expensive, i am pay check to pay check right now, i was just hoping to gather some infomation on this. Thank you very much

 

[stealth2]

You can move anywhere you want. Whether or not you'll be able to take the child(ren), is going to be up to the court.

And perhaps you could explain something to me as I've never understood... How is it possible to still be married, yet already be engaged to another? How is that good for the children? And how will they benefit from being moved away from their father?

 

[Jennx1032]

relocateing

Wow i sense some hostile vibes, I have been trying to get divorce for sometime now, like 2 years now, he is fighting everything, we have been seperated for some time now. Yes i am engaged to a wonderful man who's job takes him to differant places. First off i would never leave my child, my child comes first always. And i don't see how me being engaged to a man i love is hurting my child. I can't really see you point on that, I am going on with my life as my ex is, there is nothing wrong with that. Some couples just aren't supose to be together, if they start a new relationship or remarry, that is not child neglect, i really don't understand how who can state comments that way.Not to mention my ex is not a nice man, i have an order from the court for protection, it was a stay away, he broke it with in a week, now faces felony charges, he has admitted abuse, i am sorry if you don't agree with my leaving and getting treated with respect, instead of my son and i beng thrown into walls, and myself being punched and kicked ect. Really you should ask about the situation before you go making hostile comments. And no one said i wouldn't work out a visitation schedule, well thanks so much for jumping down my throat, you were a big help

 

[acmb05]

because

Wow i sense some hostile vibes, I have been trying to get divorce for sometime now, like 2 years now, he is fighting everything, we have been seperated for some time now. Yes i am engaged to a wonderful man who's job takes him to differant places. First off i would never leave my child, my child comes first always. And i don't see how me being engaged to a man i love is hurting my child. I can't really see you point on that, I am going on with my life as my ex is, there is nothing wrong with that. Some couples just aren't supose to be together, if they start a new relationship or remarry, that is not child neglect, i really don't understand how who can state comments that way.Not to mention my ex is not a nice man, i have an order from the court for protection, it was a stay away, he broke it with in a week, now faces felony charges, he has admitted abuse, i am sorry if you don't agree with my leaving and getting treated with respect, instead of my son and i beng thrown into walls, and myself being punched and kicked ect. Really you should ask about the situation before you go making hostile comments. And no one said i wouldn't work out a visitation schedule, well thanks so much for jumping down my throat, you were a big help

1.Hmmm lets see you are still married to dad but fooling around and sleeping with someone else but you dont see how that would hurt the child?

2. Maybe not but it should be. See answer number 1(emotionl damage maybe)

3. Funny that was not mentioned until after someone jumped down your throat.

 

[stealth2]

Well, if you thought THAT was jumping down your throat.....

Whether your ex is abusive, mean, etc doesn't change the fact that he's your kid's Dad and the break-up of your marriage is a huge event in a kid's life. To have one or both parents jump straight into new relationships is rarely a good idea. #1, it generally shows that the parent hasn't taken the time to evaluate their role in the disintigration of the marriage which bodes poorly for the future success of the next relationship. #2, it generally shows that there is little regard in helping the child(ren) heal from the trauma the parents have visited on their life.

None of what you've stated makes any difference in the fact that it will be up to the court to decide whether you can remove the child from NY. In addition, the court has apparently already decided that Dad poses no threat to the child, since standard visitation was offered. Plus, you've indicated that you're willing to provide extended visitation if you get to move. So Dad's not a danger to the kid. That part of it is a smokescreen you're using to get what you want.

Of course, if you feel that this input is unduly harsh, feel free to consult with an attorney. But I can tell you that NY isn't fond of moveaways.

 

[acmb05]

Btw

Wow i sense some hostile vibes, I have been trying to get divorce for sometime now, like 2 years now, he is fighting everything, we have been seperated for some time now. Yes i am engaged to a wonderful man who's job takes him to differant places. First off i would never leave my child, my child comes first always. And i don't see how me being engaged to a man i love is hurting my child. I can't really see you point on that, I am going on with my life as my ex is, there is nothing wrong with that. Some couples just aren't supose to be together, if they start a new relationship or remarry, that is not child neglect, i really don't understand how who can state comments that way.Not to mention my ex is not a nice man, i have an order from the court for protection, it was a stay away, he broke it with in a week, now faces felony charges, he has admitted abuse, i am sorry if you don't agree with my leaving and getting treated with respect, instead of my son and i beng thrown into walls, and myself being punched and kicked ect. Really you should ask about the situation before you go making hostile comments. And no one said i wouldn't work out a visitation schedule, well thanks so much for jumping down my throat, you were a big help

1.When does military man get back to the states?

2. Where do you plan on living until then?

3. I do hope you plan on paying for all the travel expenses to send the child to see his father once you do move(if you are allowed to)

4. As far as making a visitation schedule, the father has the child 3 weekends out of the month, If your new hubby gets stationed on the other side of the country what do you think would be fair visitation for the Bio dad now that he would not be able to see the child almost every weekend?

 

[Jennx1032]

info

Well i left my ex before i had my son, Being with someone else isn't hurting my child that has never seen us all together really, oh except the abuse, no that wouldn't harm a child, but moving on a being happy, in a stable home would be. I just signed up for some advice and all i have recieved has been hostile and nasty comments. Soryy i didn't know when you married someone, and things go bad, you should stay.I wanted more for my child, i didn't want him to grow up around that.
I am not sneaking around, we are seperated, and have been for some time.I gave my ex his visitaton, the judge granted me cust and wanted to take his time away, due to failure to appear 7 times. I never said i wanted to take his dad away, never.I am willing to pay for for transpetation for my ex to practice his visitaton. Yes his visitation would be different of course, that is something i hope to work out with him.
We reciently just got engaged , so i am not jumping into anything, he is due back from overseas in march, he will recieve his new orders in march sometime.I was just looking for infomation on this right now, i am not looking to move tomorroe or anything, And yes i understand it up to the courts, i was just hoping to get alittle infomation on this.

 

[stealth2]

An hour with a lawyer should provide you with the information you seek.

 

[acmb05]

and you got it

Well i left my ex before i had my son, Being with someone else isn't hurting my child that has never seen us all together really, oh except the abuse, no that wouldn't harm a child, but moving on a being happy, in a stable home would be. I just signed up for some advice and all i have recieved has been hostile and nasty comments. Soryy i didn't know when you married someone, and things go bad, you should stay.I wanted more for my child, i didn't want him to grow up around that.
I am not sneaking around, we are seperated, and have been for some time.I gave my ex his visitaton, the judge granted me cust and wanted to take his time away, due to failure to appear 7 times. I never said i wanted to take his dad away, never.I am willing to pay for for transpetation for my ex to practice his visitaton. Yes his visitation would be different of course, that is something i hope to work out with him.
We reciently just got engaged , so i am not jumping into anything, he is due back from overseas in march, he will recieve his new orders in march sometime.I was just looking for infomation on this right now, i am not looking to move tomorroe or anything, And yes i understand it up to the courts, i was just hoping to get alittle infomation on this.

But since it is not to your likeing you dont want to take it.

 

[acmb05]

ok then

Well i left my ex before i had my son, Being with someone else isn't hurting my child that has never seen us all together really, oh except the abuse, no that wouldn't harm a child, but moving on a being happy, in a stable home would be. I just signed up for some advice and all i have recieved has been hostile and nasty comments. Soryy i didn't know when you married someone, and things go bad, you should stay.I wanted more for my child, i didn't want him to grow up around that.
I am not sneaking around, we are seperated, and have been for some time.I gave my ex his visitaton, the judge granted me cust and wanted to take his time away, due to failure to appear 7 times. I never said i wanted to take his dad away, never.I am willing to pay for for transpetation for my ex to practice his visitaton. Yes his visitation would be different of course, that is something i hope to work out with him.
We reciently just got engaged , so i am not jumping into anything, he is due back from overseas in march, he will recieve his new orders in march sometime.I was just looking for infomation on this right now, i am not looking to move tomorroe or anything, And yes i understand it up to the courts, i was just hoping to get alittle infomation on this.

Why didnt he do that? There has to be a reason why the judge would not at the very least order supervised visits. If the judge wanted to he could have very easily.

 

[Jennx1032]

No since you seem to know nothing about my situation, and all you would like to do is pass neg. judgement on things you know nothing about i am no loner addressing this site. I wasn't looking for nasty comments and made out to be sneaking aroud on anyone. I was looking for infomation on relocating, not on my relationship and the choices i have made to better mine and my childs life. It has nothing to do with the topic of relocating, to comment on my sneaking around ect. Again thanks for all your help, I hope you never just need some infomation and get ripped apart for having a new relationship ect, whitch has nothing to do with gathering infomation for my TOPIC, you all i think missed the topic

 

[Jennx1032]

info

Why didnt he do that? There has to be a reason why the judge would not at the very least order supervised visits. If the judge wanted to he could have very easily.

She was not happy of his not appearing 7 times, plus his lawyer never appeared either, so she(the judge)was mad. I said i wanted him to have his time, for my child.He is a good dad, just wasn't a very good husband, i am not bashing him at all. We just weren't happy together, and that is it. It happens

 

[stealth2]

No since you seem to know nothing about my situation, and all you would like to do is pass neg. judgement on things you know nothing about i am no loner addressing this site. I wasn't looking for nasty comments and made out to be sneaking aroud on anyone. I was looking for infomation on relocating, not on my relationship and the choices i have made to better mine and my childs life. It has nothing to do with the topic of relocating, to comment on my sneaking around ect. Again thanks for all your help, I hope you never just need some infomation and get ripped apart for having a new relationship ect, whitch has nothing to do with gathering infomation for my TOPIC, you all i think missed the topic

Girl - we respond to the info you provide. If it's important, it should be included up front. It really isn't up to us to have to ferret out every last detail that you failed to mention. None of us are paid for this. So I suggest you make an appointment with a lawyer.

 

[Jennx1032]

thanks

Girl - we respond to the info you provide. If it's important, it should be included up front. It really isn't up to us to have to ferret out every last detail that you failed to mention. None of us are paid for this. So I suggest you make an appointment with a lawyer.

Thanks, i have a lawyer, i was trying to gather my own infomation for now, because i am only looking into it for now. Good thing you don't get paid for this, all you are doing is insulting my be stateing that i am sneaking around on my ex, and have had nothing of usefull infomation on the topic, NOT MY RELATIONSHIP. Well thanks again, it helps in life to be respectful and curtious to people. It isn't in my nature to be a nasty person. Well enjoy your day and again thanks for the help.

 

[stealth2]

Trust me - I didn't even start being insulting.