Taking My Daughter Out of Her School

[StampGirl]

Thanks Casa. He wants all the bragging rights of her being in this program yet not any of the daily responsibility. He even gets mad if she brings homework to his house on their weekend. He says it "infringes on his time". Whatever!!! ha ha I just tell him well her homework EVERY DAY infringes on "my time" with her too.

I will just do what I think is necessary and await his court papers to remove her from the school she is in. Getting the teachers opinions in writing will help as well.

Or can he just transfer her without my consent? That is another of my concerns. Does he need my permission or agreement to change schools? I am the Physical custodial parent and he has visitation but we have joint legal custody.

 

[casa]

Thanks Casa. He wants all the bragging rights of her being in this program yet not any of the daily responsibility. He even gets mad if she brings homework to his house on their weekend. He says it "infringes on his time". Whatever!!! ha ha I just tell him well her homework EVERY DAY infringes on "my time" with her too.

I will just do what I think is necessary and await his court papers to remove her from the school she is in. Getting the teachers opinions in writing will help as well.

Or can he just transfer her without my consent? That is another of my concerns. Does he need my permission or agreement to change schools? I am the Physical custodial parent and he has visitation but we have joint legal custody.

No, he cannot unilaterally change her school. The school should not release her records to any new school without your consent. (It's happened, but that's highly unusual). Her physical address/Jurisdiction is your address/Home. If he tried that stunt...especially here in CA...he'd be toast. Rather, I'd expect him to file a motion to modify. You'd respond. Back to the do-si-do

Joint Legal means you have to Confer/Consult/Agree. However, in cases re; school location, etc. if the parents don't agree...it's most likely to go the way the CP wants it to. (barring any credible issue with the school of CP's choice).

 

[StampGirl]

No, he cannot unilaterally change her school. The school should not release her records to any new school without your consent. (It's happened, but that's highly unusual). Her physical address/Jurisdiction is your address/Home. If he tried that stunt...especially here in CA...he'd be toast. Rather, I'd expect him to file a motion to modify. You'd respond. Back to the do-si-do

Joint Legal means you have to Confer/Consult/Agree. However, in cases re; school location, etc. if the parents don't agree...it's most likely to go the way the CP wants it to. (barring any credible issue with the school of CP's choice).

Thanks Casa

I fully expect him to file the motion and thats fine. I will be ready. He will look foolish as usual!!

Thanks for the help.

 

[casa]

Thanks Casa

I fully expect him to file the motion and thats fine. I will be ready. He will look foolish as usual!!

Thanks for the help.

If he does file, come back here before you file your Responsive Declaration. And, don't worry, he's slowly getting Jerk Status. That's fun to watch

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

If he does file, come back here before you file your Responsive Declaration. And, don't worry, he's slowly getting Jerk Status. That's fun to watch

Slowly? I thought he was at full status already!

 

[momandsmom003]

I just had to comment, hope no one minds. "her homework infringes on HIS time"??? WHAT? My hubby asked for Thurs. - Sun and then Wed overnight for his visitation, b/c he WANTED to be involved with school and homework. He wants to feel "in the loop" Just goes to show you that all dad's are NOT created equal. As they should ALL want to be included in EVERY aspect of their own child!!!

 

[casa]

Slowly? I thought he was at full status already!

Naah, that's when the Judge tells him not to come back. Priceless. Truly

 

[StampGirl]

Slowly? I thought he was at full status already!

HA HA

Yes but slowly in the court's eye he is gaining that status. No worries. I just sit back and let the motions come! I will respond accordingly. Yes, I will come back here before I send in the response papers. Meanwhile I will get all my ducks in a row so I am prepared.

The only motion I plan to do in the future is to request counseling. We are still going back and forth on that issue. Oh and also plan to change the child support orders because now that I am working and he has a significant increase in pay as well. They need to reflect both of our income changes. (yes I believe the amount is going to go down but I want to be legal so he has nothing to complain about) I also want to be able to claim the kids every other year as he gets them now every year (based soley on the fact I wasn't working when the order was done and is modifiable when I start working).

 

[casa]

I just had to comment, hope no one minds. "her homework infringes on HIS time"??? WHAT? My hubby asked for Thurs. - Sun and then Wed overnight for his visitation, b/c he WANTED to be involved with school and homework. He wants to feel "in the loop" Just goes to show you that all dad's are NOT created equal. As they should ALL want to be included in EVERY aspect of their own child!!!

Most people wind up on these forums because they have Parenting Conflicts.

 

[StampGirl]

I just had to comment, hope no one minds. "her homework infringes on HIS time"??? WHAT? My hubby asked for Thurs. - Sun and then Wed overnight for his visitation, b/c he WANTED to be involved with school and homework. He wants to feel "in the loop" Just goes to show you that all dad's are NOT created equal. As they should ALL want to be included in EVERY aspect of their own child!!!

Yes he (in the same breath) says he doesn't get to spend any time with the kids because of his work schedule yet turns around and won't do trades to accomodate the days he can't be with them due to work. I offer trades and he states "trades don't work for us". Us means him and his Wifey. The mediator told him to find another job if the one he has doesn't allow him to spend all his court appointed time with his kids or to stop whining!!! LOL Yes those were her exact words!!!

 

[momandsmom003]

Most people wind up on these forums because they have Parenting Conflicts.

Yes, I guess that is true. I personally just like to see WHAT those conflicts are and how others tend to feel they should be dealt with. It's educational to me and somewhat of an eye opening experience. Different people's opinions are important, and you guys have great links on state laws. Hope I didn't offend anyone?!

 

[StampGirl]

Naah, that's when the Judge tells him not to come back. Priceless. Truly

We have yet to be in front of the judge since our agreement was official back in 2004. He avoids the judge like the plague!! ha ha

We have been to mediation a few times yet always reached and signed an agreement and never had to be in front of the judge. Apparently, if we agree and there are no attorneys involved, then it is stamped with a judge's signature and it becomes legal etc w/o being seen in the courtroom.

 

[casa]

HA HA

Yes but slowly in the court's eye he is gaining that status. No worries. I just sit back and let the motions come! I will respond accordingly. Yes, I will come back here before I send in the response papers. Meanwhile I will get all my ducks in a row so I am prepared.

The only motion I plan to do in the future is to request counseling. We are still going back and forth on that issue. Oh and also plan to change the child support orders because now that I am working and he has a significant increase in pay as well. They need to reflect both of our income changes. (yes I believe the amount is going to go down but I want to be legal so he has nothing to complain about) I also want to be able to claim the kids every other year as he gets them now every year (based soley on the fact I wasn't working when the order was done and is modifiable when I start working).

Child Support is easier. Is it through CSE? You have to report all income changes either way...and then it's a simple task of re-calculating.

If he files, that's a PERFECT opportunity to push counseling. Parenting conflict, School Issues... perfect reasons to request counseling to 'get on the same page' with Dad & the school as a TEAM. Since daughter's been in this tutoring, and is in advanced classes, and is struggling with Spanish~ Isn't this a prime opportunity to have her keep in communication with her school counselor? (Ya know, if a school counselor thinks Family Counseling would be helpful...that's a perfect Seque Way into therapy/counseling while protecting yourself from a filing of Contempt). Just make sure you document ALL correspondence, showing repeated attempts to confer/agree/negotiate.

 

[casa]

We have yet to be in front of the judge since our agreement was official back in 2004. He avoids the judge like the plague!! ha ha

We have been to mediation a few times yet always reached and signed an agreement and never had to be in front of the judge. Apparently, if we agree and there are no attorneys involved, then it is stamped with a judge's signature and it becomes legal etc w/o being seen in the courtroom.

Avoids the court room, eh? Figures. lol

Yes, in CA the Mediators report will be signed by the Judge as long as both parents agree to it. And, if both parents DO NOT agree (even moreso when Pro Se) the Mediator's Recommendation weighs heavily with the Court. It saves time, litigation, etc.

 

[momandsmom003]

Us means him and his Wifey. The mediator told him to find another job if the one he has doesn't allow him to spend all his court appointed time with his kids or to stop whining!!! LOL Yes those were her exact words!!!

Too Funny. Have to say, agree with the mediator... I personally would NEVER infringe on my hubby's time with his children. When you marry a man with kids, you HAVE to take 2nd place sometimes. It's life. No room for the "green eyed monster" in these situations.