What are reasonable steps to take when a parent is suspected of substance abuse?

[abys32]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

that means nothing. i collect cans bottles and plastics. all my neighbors pitch in, my kids and i pick up others on walks. doesn't mean we drink all of them. and legally, what is excessive drinking?

jailtime doesn't prove it. a CONVICTION proves it.

I agree with you about the bottles etc.. What if a recycler takes them and they're not there anymore. I'm sure that it is only a first step, and for good reason. Some people do attempt to harrass the other parent, or an unliked neighbor, etc.. over nothing.

Kudos for your recycling efforts. Hopefully no one tried to use it against you!

I am assuming he must have been in jail for a reason, and not just camping out for 2 weeks for the good food and comfy bed. The reason might suggest bad judgement on his part.

 

[abys32]

some background

In NJ, child protection will (initially) only search for evidence that a substance abuse allegation is true (i.e., a trash can full of beer cans suggest excessive drinking). If they don't have a court order to search, they probably can't check the glovebox for a pipe. Not too clear on their authority. Maybe family court offers different authority.

What are reasonable steps to take when one parent suspects the other of drinking/substance abuse? It seems like a slippery slope that can actually backfire.

 

[LdiJ]

In NJ, child protection will (initially) only search for evidence that a substance abuse allegation is true (i.e., a trash can full of beer cans suggest excessive drinking). If they don't have a court order to search, they probably can't check the glovebox for a pipe. Not too clear on their authority. Maybe family court offers different authority.

What are reasonable steps to take when one parent suspects the other of drinking/substance abuse? It seems like a slippery slope that can actually backfire.

The parent needs some sort of outside evidence that a problem exists that negatively impacts the child. Otherwise, its none of their business.

 

[Isis1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?



I agree with you about the bottles etc.. What if a recycler takes them and they're not there anymore. I'm sure that it is only a first step, and for good reason. Some people do attempt to harrass the other parent, or an unliked neighbor, etc.. over nothing.

Kudos for your recycling efforts. Hopefully no one tried to use it against you!

I am assuming he must have been in jail for a reason, and not just camping out for 2 weeks for the good food and comfy bed. The reason might suggest bad judgement on his part.

not all drug convictions end up in jail. and not everyone in jail ends up with a conviction.

 

[stealth2]

I agree with you about the bottles etc..

Further on this - a bunch of cans/bottles could mean lots of things. Someone had a party - possibly not even the person whose recycling bin it is (my neighbors routinely ask to use mine and other neighbor's when they have a large party - we each then put our own bins out on recycling day). It could also mean the person forgets to put the bin out.

I happen to have a pretty healthy stash of empty wine bottles - I save the ones with cool labels. Doesn't mean I drank them all over a short period of time.

As for the jail time - unless it was for something that endangered the child, it may not impact visitation or custody at all. Even if it was for DUI and/or drug use and even if it lead to a conviction, the most that might occur would likely be an order that he not drink or use while the kid is with him.

 

[abys32]

The parent needs some sort of outside evidence that a problem exists that negatively impacts the child. Otherwise, its none of their business.

Well, in a legal sense, none of their business. What you say certainly seems to be the case. I know that teacher and other personnel repeatedly saw a parent or another authorized adult come to school smelling like alcohol to pick up a little girl from school. When it was reported to child protection, they took over an hour to arrive. Their suggestion in the interim, make the parent wait there for them. Well, the parent chose not to wait (duh). It turned out, it was OK because the parent was *walking* the child home from school rather than driving. The report exists, I guess.

 

[abys32]

Further on this - a bunch of cans/bottles could mean lots of things. Someone had a party - possibly not even the person whose recycling bin it is (my neighbors routinely ask to use mine and other neighbor's when they have a large party - we each then put our own bins out on recycling day). It could also mean the person forgets to put the bin out.

I happen to have a pretty healthy stash of empty wine bottles - I save the ones with cool labels. Doesn't mean I drank them all over a short period of time.

I certainly agree. I think the example of bottles are meant to determine whether the agency will investigate further, or more intrusively, rather than to use it as a final determination of abuse or negligence.

I also enjoy a glass of wine. I'm told its good for the heart.

 

[abys32]

As for the jail time - unless it was for something that endangered the child, it may not impact visitation or custody at all. Even if it was for DUI and/or drug use and even if it lead to a conviction, the most that might occur would likely be an order that he not drink or use while the kid is with him.[/QUOTE]

Sometimes parents are supposed to submit for testing on a regular basis (to be honest I'm thinking if Brittany Spears). They make stupid decisions for themselves, but must they be shown to affect the children for this to happen?

 

[Isis1]

As for the jail time - unless it was for something that endangered the child, it may not impact visitation or custody at all. Even if it was for DUI and/or drug use and even if it lead to a conviction, the most that might occur would likely be an order that he not drink or use while the kid is with him.

Sometimes parents are supposed to submit for testing on a regular basis (to be honest I'm thinking if Brittany Spears). They make stupid decisions for themselves, but must they be shown to affect the children for this to happen?

yes. case in point, Britney. she withheld one of the children in the bathroom while she was having a meltdown. affected the children.

 

[LdiJ]

As for the jail time - unless it was for something that endangered the child, it may not impact visitation or custody at all. Even if it was for DUI and/or drug use and even if it lead to a conviction, the most that might occur would likely be an order that he not drink or use while the kid is with him.

Sometimes parents are supposed to submit for testing on a regular basis (to be honest I'm thinking if Brittany Spears). They make stupid decisions for themselves, but must they be shown to affect the children for this to happen?[/QUOTE]


Yes, its generally necessary for it to be shown that it effects the children negatively, unless of course the problem is so bad that it couldn't help but effect the children negatively.