What constitutes harrassment to child's father?

[Katie in FL]

I have been trying to reach my child's father for 2 weeks (at home and at his cell). I know he has received my messages, and does not return my calls or emails. If I need to reach him about his child, do I have to send a certified letter or can I assume that he has the info when I send am email or leave a voicemail? The reasons for contact are legit: discuss when he wants to see the child, an upcoming move, upcoming letter he will receive from courthouse, etc...

He is often difficult to reach; however I've waited 2 weeks now, and have never been told not to call again to his work or cell number (by others, not by him).

 

[Gracie3787]

I have been trying to reach my child's father for 2 weeks (at home and at his cell). I know he has received my messages, and does not return my calls or emails. If I need to reach him about his child, do I have to send a certified letter or can I assume that he has the info when I send am email or leave a voicemail? The reasons for contact are legit: discuss when he wants to see the child, an upcoming move, upcoming letter he will receive from courthouse, etc...

He is often difficult to reach; however I've waited 2 weeks now, and have never been told not to call again to his work or cell number (by others, not by him).

First, do your visitation orders specify how contact should be made?
I assume that with having a record of e-mails and calls, you can prove that you attempted to contact him about visitation.

If there is a question of you harrassing him, I don't think that trying to contact him to make plan for visitation will be considered as harrassment.

Since you've tried for 2 weeks, I would sit back and let him contact you.

 

[Katie in FL]

RE: Harrassment

Our visitation only stipulates that he has to call to cancel if not showing up, and that he gets 2 weeks a year for vacation time. He has not taken our child any of his vacation for the last year - and also hasn't come for any visitation since the 1st week of Jan. 2005.

I know I'm feeling a bit axious with a move out of state in a few months.
It is a bit upsetting that he doesn't try to communicate about these issues, when it seems that we are not on bad terms too (not that it's ever "great"). We have a hearing coming up soon for the judge to accept what we signed in agreement about the move - and now I'm a bit worried too that he might change his mind about letting me move if I talk with him about child support, insurance, or other matters; or that he'll say that I'm harrassing him.

What point would it prove if he says that I'm harrassing him? Does that mean he would get to contact me only regarding our child?

 

[LdiJ]

Our visitation only stipulates that he has to call to cancel if not showing up, and that he gets 2 weeks a year for vacation time. He has not taken our child any of his vacation for the last year - and also hasn't come for any visitation since the 1st week of Jan. 2005.

I know I'm feeling a bit axious with a move out of state in a few months.
It is a bit upsetting that he doesn't try to communicate about these issues, when it seems that we are not on bad terms too (not that it's ever "great"). We have a hearing coming up soon for the judge to accept what we signed in agreement about the move - and now I'm a bit worried too that he might change his mind about letting me move if I talk with him about child support, insurance, or other matters; or that he'll say that I'm harrassing him.

What point would it prove if he says that I'm harrassing him? Does that mean he would get to contact me only regarding our child?

Regarding the move: You absolutely DO need to send him a certified letter about that. If he does not sign for the certified letter then you need to petition the court for permission to relocate with the child.

He could be deliberately avoiding your communication so that he can attempt to force you to bring the child back...or get custody himself, because you moved without proper notice/permission.

 

[Katie in FL]

I will send a certified letter (what if he does not sign for it?). I will also send a certified letter after I move indicating all my new contact info.

He signed an agreement regarding visitation, etc, for our move out of state a while ago.

I also plan to try to have the signed and authorized court agreement accepted to the state I move to.

Any further advice is helpful.

Thank you!!!

 

[Katie in FL]

Court hearing for petition move

We are planning to have a hearing within the next few weeks (hopefully). The hearing is for the judge to accept the paperwork that was signed by myself and the father to permit me to move, and covers the visitation arrangement that will occur with the new move.

If my child's father does not show up at the hearing on that day, and has has been sent certified notices of the hearing, would I still make the petition to relocate? If so, could I make that petition on the same court day?

Thank you again for the replies, this has been most helpful info!

 

[stealth2]

You need to find out what Florida requires to constitute proper service - not all states allow service by mail. Also, you cannot simply add a new petition or request to an existing appearance. He would need to be specifically served regarding it.

 

[LdiJ]

You need to find out what Florida requires to constitute proper service - not all states allow service by mail. Also, you cannot simply add a new petition or request to an existing appearance. He would need to be specifically served regarding it.

The way I understood her was that was what the entire hearing was about. The agreed upon move and the visitation agreement signed in relationship to the move.

Therefore it sounds to me like she is already on top of things. The signed agreement is enough for her to safely move....but it does need the judge's signature for the visitation aspects etc., to be enforceable.

However I agree that she needs to make sure that "service" was properly made.

Katie, are you using an attorney for all of this or have you done it without one? If you have an attorney then don't worry about service. If you don't, then make sure you served him according to FL state law.

 

[Katie in FL]

Lawyer & hearing

I have a lawyer through a reduced fee program. Services with this lawyer haven't gone well (this is why I'm trying to keep informed). Lawyer was paid about 20 months ago and hasn't completed the work yet (only filed the motion for change a day ago through the county courthouse).

Should my lawyer have child's father SERVED in order to notify him of hearing? My lawyer has just said to "let him know" that a letter will be coming to notify him of the hearing date - meaning to me to let my child's father know about the event during any general correspondance with him.

In expressing my concerns about child's father not communicating with me, my lawyer advises that he doesn't think any problems should be coming up. Stating that the child's father agreed to relocating with our son. So, it would be difficult for him to argue against that now. Also stating that I haven't moved yet. He also said that the child's father will be provided with notice of the hearing, and so everything is being done with proper notice.

Trying to trust the process, just having a lot of uncertainty through it all. I have heard of horror stories about people who moved out of state, who also had a judge approve the move - and their child was taken from them when they revisited the state. But I know that's all hearsay.

 

[Katie in FL]

Update

I found out that the file was checked out by the judge's office today. What does the judge look at when a lawyer requests an expedited hearing date, please? Any approximate ideas on how long it takes the judge to set a hearing date?