wondering why my thread got closed

[xxnatalixx]

You said that a car window was broken, right? Wonder if the window is fixed yet? Anyone on that street that can get a picture of said car? Think you can "time stamp" a picture by including a cellphone display of the time along with the vehicle in question. You might have to have a few "witnesses" to say that it isn't peachy keen over at that house.

Was there ever any domestic violence when you were together with the father?

The car is up in his driveway so I don't think that will work. This is his second broken window. The other one got broken in another fight from what son said, but I don't have any proof of that.

He threw things sometimes and yelled. He was mad every day when I got home from work because he was always accusing me of cheating on him. I asked him why he thought I would do that and he said, "well, I know I love you and I'm cheating on you, so what's to stop you from cheating on me?" He never hit me or anything though. He was just very possesive.

 

[Ohiogal]

Ok, so first children services called and said that they wanted me to know that they were getting ready to contact dad. I'm not sure why they told me unless it was just a heads up in case he got mad or something.

Very well can be.

Then, a little before 5 the court house called and said that the magistrated signed off on the order to suspend visitation and that they are still trying to contact dad's attorney to see if she is still representing him. She said we don't have a date for the hearing yet, but that I can pick up the paper about the suspended visits in the morning! Praise God!

See! I am glad it worked out. Okay out of curiosity did you write it like I told you to?

Anyway, then children services called back and said that they interviewed dad, sm, and their kids and they all said there was no fight, so she decided to drop the safety plan. What exactly did they think they would say?

The thing is don't worry about Children Services. They won't substantiate abuse necessarily but that does NOT mean nothing happened.

Then I ran into an old co worker at Walmart who asked me if dad and sm still lived down the street from her parents. I said yes, and asked why. She said that her son was playing with sm's son and that sm's son told him that his mom and dad were fighting all the time and that he and his mom and sister might have to move out. Then my aunt called and said that dad's brother, who is a good friend of hers, was up at dad's house and decided to leave because dad was throwing a fit and threw something through the car window.(this was over the weekend, same fit) As I'm typing this, I just found out that dad's brother is living there again and dad has told me on numerous occasions that his brother molested him until he was 17.

Subpoena them all.

I'm wondering now, is it common for a judge to sign off on something like suspending visitation if they don't think there really is a problem? That doesn't sound right, but I'm not sure how to say it. Basically, I'm wondering if it's "standard" to sign off on something like that until a hearing can be held on it or if this means he thinks there's good cause for it. It still sounds like a stupid question, but I'm nervous about it.

Normally visitation suspensions are NOT rubberstamped. There has to be something behind it that they believe it is in the best interest of the child to do so.
Be it dad's fit in the hallway last week.

 

[LdiJ]

Ok, so first children services called and said that they wanted me to know that they were getting ready to contact dad. I'm not sure why they told me unless it was just a heads up in case he got mad or something. Then, a little before 5 the court house called and said that the magistrated signed off on the order to suspend visitation and that they are still trying to contact dad's attorney to see if she is still representing him. She said we don't have a date for the hearing yet, but that I can pick up the paper about the suspended visits in the morning! Praise God! Anyway, then children services called back and said that they interviewed dad, sm, and their kids and they all said there was no fight, so she decided to drop the safety plan. What exactly did they think they would say? Then I ran into an old co worker at Walmart who asked me if dad and sm still lived down the street from her parents. I said yes, and asked why. She said that her son was playing with sm's son and that sm's son told him that his mom and dad were fighting all the time and that he and his mom and sister might have to move out. Then my aunt called and said that dad's brother, who is a good friend of hers, was up at dad's house and decided to leave because dad was throwing a fit and threw something through the car window.(this was over the weekend, same fit) As I'm typing this, I just found out that dad's brother is living there again and dad has told me on numerous occasions that his brother molested him until he was 17.
I'm wondering now, is it common for a judge to sign off on something like suspending visitation if they don't think there really is a problem? That doesn't sound right, but I'm not sure how to say it. Basically, I'm wondering if it's "standard" to sign off on something like that until a hearing can be held on it or if this means he thinks there's good cause for it. It still sounds like a stupid question, but I'm nervous about it.

No, they generally don't sign off on something like that unless they believe that there is a problem. It may be that dad's antics in court before were enough to convince the judge that there is at least a potential problem.

I am relieved as heck that the judge signed off on the suspension of visitation, since children's services wimped out so badly.

 

[xxnatalixx]

Very well can be.



See! I am glad it worked out. Okay out of curiosity did you write it like I told you to?


The thing is don't worry about Children Services. They won't substantiate abuse necessarily but that does NOT mean nothing happened.


Subpoena them all.



Normally visitation suspensions are NOT rubberstamped. There has to be something behind it that they believe it is in the best interest of the child to do so.
Be it dad's fit in the hallway last week.

I wrote it exactly like you told me. In fact, I printed it out so I could look at is as I typed.

I'm not concerned about children services really. His counselor can testify to the fact that he is genuinly afraid of his dad.

I won't subpoena my aunt because she has lied for dad in court before. She almost married dad's brother and they are still very close. She knows what he did to dad all those years too but still leaves him unsupervised with her boys. It makes me sick to my stomach.

I'm so happy to hear that they don't normally do that. It is such a relief. Thank God dad showed his temper that day!

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

OG - how much of what dad said in the hallway that day could be brought out in court on this case now? He said it in front of witnesses, so he can't deny that said it.

Natalie - what is it that you want for you son in this case? For all visits to stop? For the visits to be supervised? That dad attend anger management classes? This didn't get broken overnight - it won't get fixed overnight.

 

[xxnatalixx]

OG - how much of what dad said in the hallway that day could be brought out in court on this case now? He said it in front of witnesses, so he can't deny that said it.

Natalie - what is it that you want for you son in this case? For all visits to stop? For the visits to be supervised? That dad attend anger management classes? This didn't get broken overnight - it won't get fixed overnight.

I would really like supervised visits and anger management. Honestly, after everyting that's happend, it would really upset me if dad just didn't visit at all. Best case scenario, dad grows up and teaches his son to be a good man. I'm not too horrible of a mom, but I'll never be a good dad.

 

[Ohiogal]

OG - how much of what dad said in the hallway that day could be brought out in court on this case now? He said it in front of witnesses, so he can't deny that said it.

Natalie - what is it that you want for you son in this case? For all visits to stop? For the visits to be supervised? That dad attend anger management classes? This didn't get broken overnight - it won't get fixed overnight.

It can be included to show his temper. And the best thing -- his attorney can be subpoenaed as a witness due to the fact that he was there and saw dad make a threat which is a crime. So Natalie's attorney (see how we assume that is her name?) can actually ask that his attorney be forced to withdraw as he is a witness to dad's violent behavior and that he is going to be a witness. I would do it. But I am mean.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

So dad showed his temper in the Magistrate's court room. Then he proceeded to threaten the mother in the court house.

I would be seeing if there would be anyone willing to testify to dad having a temper - around the home or around children.

Have the children participated in any sports, such as soccer, baseball, etc. that dad might have shown his colors?

 

[LdiJ]

I would really like supervised visits and anger management. Honestly, after everyting that's happend, it would really upset me if dad just didn't visit at all. Best case scenario, dad grows up and teaches his son to be a good man. I'm not too horrible of a mom, but I'll never be a good dad.

I am glad that you are optimistic about the future, but don't hold out too much hope. It has always disturbed me that dad would get angry at stepmom for picking up your mutual son. I have always thought that if there was no stepmom, there would be no dad.

At the same time I really wonder about stepmom as well...and any woman like her.

If I had to remove my children from my home, in order to protect them, my marriage would be DONE unless my husband went through serious counseling.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

When a person is involved in a situation involving domestic violence, whether it is directed at them or at items in the house, there can be a psychological dependence and self-esteem issues that keep them there. It sometimes takes drastic intervention to get them out of that situation.

Something keeps stepmom there. It took a shotgun pointed directly at me to get me out.

 

[xxnatalixx]

It can be included to show his temper. And the best thing -- his attorney can be subpoenaed as a witness due to the fact that he was there and saw dad make a threat which is a crime. So Natalie's attorney (see how we assume that is her name?) can actually ask that his attorney be forced to withdraw as he is a witness to dad's violent behavior and that he is going to be a witness. I would do it. But I am mean.

I don't have an attorney anymore. He was court appointed for the contempt case. He actaully asked for a recess in the middle of court that day and told me that if I would just go ahead and say that I denied dad's Thanksgiving, which I did not, that we would not have to sit in there all day and that the worst that could happen to me was a suspended jail sentence. Did I ever mention that he rents a room from dad's attorney. Her office is a house and he has a room upstairs, her office is in the downstairs. It made me a bit uneasy to walk through dad's attorney's office to get to my attorney's office. Anyway, I don't know if she is dad's attorney now. No one said it straight out, but I get the feeling from what I've heard, that she may no longer be his attorney. I think he was not so nice to her that day either.

 

[xxnatalixx]

Just read SM's status on Myspace.....

"It's not worth it nomore. I guess they finally have what they want."


Hope this means what I think it does**************...Shouldn't I be happy?
Still praying dad grows up. You never know.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Don't understand the message. Who has what now?

 

[xxnatalixx]

Don't understand the message. Who has what now?

That was step mom's status. I copied and pasted it.

I guess I expect you to read my mind and already know about what she said the other night. She told me that they were starting to think it wasn't worth it anymore to keep trying to see him. I think what she's saying now is that they finally decided it's not worth it and that son and I got what we want.

 

[wileybunch]

That was step mom's status. I copied and pasted it.

I guess I expect you to read my mind and already know about what she said the other night. She told me that they were starting to think it wasn't worth it anymore to keep trying to see him. I think what she's saying now is that they finally decided it's not worth it and that son and I got what we want.

She can bite you. Your son most definitely is worth it.
What's not worth it is a big ninny sissy of a man exploding all over his wife and kids.