Can I ignore Court Subpena for testifingagainst my husband on DV case ? Please help!

[cbg]

Is the law going to say something different depending on the answers to these questions?

No?

Then they're not important.

 

[Ladyback1]

Is the law going to say something different depending on the answers to these questions?

No?

Then they're not important.

You're right....

I'm still concerned with the children involved 1) they saw this, 2) will it happen again?

 

[cbg]

We all are. But having the OP answer your questions isn't going to (a) change the legal answer to her question or (b) magically make the children safe.

Your heart's in the right place, hon, but you've got to learn a certain level of objectivity if you're going to be effective as a responder.

 

[CdwJava]

Well, depending on the law in IL, the relationship between the abuser and the children MIGHT make a difference in the nature of charges that can be pursued. For instance, we have a recent state appellate decision out here (unpublished, thank God!) that found that since a defendant (live-in boyfriend) did NOT have a responsibility to care for the children in an incident where he stabbed mom in their presence, he could not have been found guilty of child endangerment or neglect (which he had been). So, the question of the abuser's relationship to the kids can have an effect on the outcome, and even those measures that the abuser might be able to take to see the kids and thus weasel his way back into the victim's life.

So, while the answers to Ladybacks questions won't change the big picture vis-a-vis the DV, they can have an effect on potential criminal charges as well as custody and visitation, of course.

 

[Proserpina]

Well, depending on the law in IL, the relationship between the abuser and the children MIGHT make a difference in the nature of charges that can be pursued. For instance, we have a recent state appellate decision out here (unpublished, thank God!) that found that since a defendant (live-in boyfriend) did NOT have a responsibility to care for the children in an incident where he stabbed mom in their presence, he could not have been found guilty of child endangerment or neglect (which he had been). So, the question of the abuser's relationship to the kids can have an effect on the outcome, and even those measures that the abuser might be able to take to see the kids and thus weasel his way back into the victim's life.

So, while the answers to Ladybacks questions won't change the big picture vis-a-vis the DV, they can have an effect on potential criminal charges as well as custody and visitation, of course.

!

Me no likey CA no more!

 

[CdwJava]

!

Me no likey CA no more!

Well, it was an unpublished opinion ... but it put a little shiver up our collecitive spines as it gave some inkling as to the state courts' position on child endangement and non-bio/guardian adults in an intimate relationship.

 

[Proserpina]

Well, it was an unpublished opinion ... but it put a little shiver up our collecitive spines as it gave some inkling as to the state courts' position on child endangement and non-bio/guardian adults in an intimate relationship.

It's truly a frightening thing

 

[SmokeyParkCop]

"The knife broke and fell on the floor" is akin to that old saying "the gun went off".

Knives don't break themselves and then throw themselves on the floor, so the two of you must have been having a knock down drag out in front of your kids. One of you (I'm still not sure which or even both) deserved to go to jail that night.

It shouldn't matter who was the one who started the fight or what happened with the knife, you don't hit a women, as soon as he slapped her he was guilty and deserves everything he gets. You don't bring it to that level with a lady, there is NO need to hit the weaker sex, there is no more excuse to hit a women then there is a child, there are a lot of parallels and it's just something you don't do. there is something seriously wrong with a man who would do something like that.

Testify against him, make sure he does as much time as is possible, you don't want someone like that around your children, period!

 

[Proserpina]

It shouldn't matter who was the one who started the fight or what happened with the knife, you don't hit a women, as soon as he slapped her he was guilty and deserves everything he gets. You don't bring it to that level with a lady, there is NO need to hit the weaker sex, there is no more excuse to hit a women then there is a child, there are a lot of parallels and it's just something you don't do. there is something seriously wrong with a man who would do something like that.

Testify against him, make sure he does as much time as is possible, you don't want someone like that around your children, period!

I'm going to assume you're trolling again.

But for the benefit of others:

Smokey seems to believe that if a woman is standing above a man and about to shoot him, he's not allowed to defend himself. Oh, and it's okay to hit a man but not a woman.

How...odd.

 

[SmokeyParkCop]

I'm going to assume you're trolling again.

But for the benefit of others:

Smokey seems to believe that if a woman is standing above a man and about to shoot him, he's not allowed to defend himself. Oh, and it's okay to hit a man but not a woman.

How...odd.

No, that's not what i'm saying, just take the gun out of her hand, grab her wrist, bear hug her, it's not like you're wrestling with another man, you wouldn't hit a child or the physically disabled, why would you hit a women? In general, Men are equal to other men in strength, stature, ability, etc., yes, it is absolutely fine for men to fight, it's fair, obviously i don't mean a 20yr old guy should be fighting an 115yr old man, or a 7'2" guy fighting a 5'2 guy, imo, thats like picking on a women. Picking on a defenseless little women is NOT ok!

 

[quincy]

No, that's not what i'm saying, just take the gun out of her hand, grab her wrist, bear hug her, it's not like you're wrestling with another man, you wouldn't hit a child or the physically disabled, why would you hit a women? In general, Men are equal to other men in strength, stature, ability, etc., yes, it is absolutely fine for men to fight, it's fair, obviously i don't mean a 20yr old guy should be fighting an 115yr old man, or a 7'2" guy fighting a 5'2 guy, imo, thats like picking on a women. Picking on a defenseless little women is NOT ok!

Let's just ignore the fact that a "defenseless little woman" just admitted she was guilty of murdering her husband by pushing him off a cliff, shall we?


For information on domestic violence, below is a link to the "An Abuse, Rape & Domestic Violence Aid & Resource Collection" website (male victims page):
http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/malevictims.shtml

 

[Proserpina]

No, that's not what i'm saying, just take the gun out of her hand, grab her wrist, bear hug her, it's not like you're wrestling with another man, you wouldn't hit a child or the physically disabled, why would you hit a women? In general, Men are equal to other men in strength, stature, ability, etc., yes, it is absolutely fine for men to fight, it's fair, obviously i don't mean a 20yr old guy should be fighting an 115yr old man, or a 7'2" guy fighting a 5'2 guy, imo, thats like picking on a women. Picking on a defenseless little women is NOT ok!

Now I know you're trolling.

You're a Cowboys fan, aren't you?

Bummer.

 

[Proserpina]

Let's just ignore the fact that a "defenseless little woman" just admitted she was guilty of murdering her husband by pushing him off a cliff, shall we?

http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/malevictims.shtml

Well doh, quincy. All of us poor defenseless widdle wimmin folk depend on dah bwoot force of dah Big Pwotwectah Man.



Kind if easy to see why his Invisible Ex left him, innit?

 

[SmokeyParkCop]

Now I know you're trolling.

You're a Cowboys fan, aren't you?

Bummer.

I like the Steelers.

 

[Ladyback1]

It shouldn't matter who was the one who started the fight or what happened with the knife, you don't hit a women, as soon as he slapped her he was guilty and deserves everything he gets. You don't bring it to that level with a lady, there is NO need to hit the weaker sex, there is no more excuse to hit a women then there is a child, there are a lot of parallels and it's just something you don't do. there is something seriously wrong with a man who would do something like that.

Testify against him, make sure he does as much time as is possible, you don't want someone like that around your children, period!

You are an idiot!

I know plenty of women who could take the average man in a fair fight.