complicated child custody, child support case

[CourtClerk]

How long has he been a drug dealer? Has he ever been arrested?

 

[Rguerrero2]

How long has he been a drug dealer? Has he ever been arrested?

He has been since my daughter was a year old or so. He has been arrested for other things in the past, but regarding his drug dealing, he has been fortunate to never get caught yet.

His sister and her husband were running or holding his drugs for him a couple of years back, and they were caught, and both arrested for possession.(Nice brother, huh?) His sister got out on a huge bond and guess who paid that? I believe she is still on probation for that as well.

Hopefully, the fact that he hasn't been caught will change soon. He has no idea who might be watching, and documenting.

 

[CourtClerk]

He has been since my daughter was a year old or so.

When did the two of you separate/break up/divorce (whatever the particular case is).

 

[nextwife]

He has been since my daughter was a year old or so. He has been arrested for other things in the past, but regarding his drug dealing, he has been fortunate to never get caught yet.

His sister and her husband were running or holding his drugs for him a couple of years back, and they were caught, and both arrested for possession.(Nice brother, huh?) His sister got out on a huge bond and guess who paid that? I believe she is still on probation for that as well.

Hopefully, the fact that he hasn't been caught will change soon. He has no idea who might be watching, and documenting.

And before you got pregnant, he was a hardworking, drug free, law abiding, tax paying choirboy?

 

[Rguerrero2]

And before you got pregnant, he was a hardworking, drug free, law abiding, tax paying choirboy?

haha. NO. but he didn't sell drugs (as far as I knew), and he seemed to work hard for a living. He honestly held a job and he was committed to helping to provide for his daughter. We BOTH were.

C'mon guys. Ok, let me rephrase what I wrote. When I found out what he did for sure was when she was about 1 year old. We separated about 2 years after that for good. She was 4 or so and he became more and more open and flashy about what he was doing within the same circle of people we knew.

 

[Rguerrero2]

When did the two of you separate/break up/divorce (whatever the particular case is).

Around 1998, when my daughter was 4. Guess about 10 years ago.
(Remarried 7 years ago.)

 

[Ohiogal]

You know, and it's attorneys like you (or whatever you are), if you really are one, that help to let men like my ex, get away with what they are doing.

Actually no. I don't help drug dealers get away with what they are doing. What I DO is protect people's rights from being trampled.

Drug dealing, doing drugs, jacking around with child support, and playing games when it comes to coparenting(all NOT in the best interest of a child in anyway)

PROVE IT. The burden is on you. So prove it.

If guys like that just happen to stumble upon sites like this or hear counsel from a legal representative, like what you just gave, that gives them the continued strength they need to keep fighting and being dirty instead of cooperating.

So again I say PROVE IT.

And since when is it looked positively upon for a father to NOT pay their child support, especially considering that he is in a position to pay???

When there is no court order and anything said person gives is a gift.

You know what? Who cares what your opinions are really. Lets talk about how you sound , because my question was NEVER to ask you how I sounded, but you threw that in there anyway - you sound like an angry, bitter woman with no children, and its obvious someone screwed you over big time for you to be so argumentive and ugly.

Personal attacks. I smell blood in the water. Your emotion has just destroyed you.

(I've ready your replys to other posts. Your attitude is really UNNECESSARY.) Someone who talks out your a@$ just to pick arguments with people that really need help. What a good samaritan. Thanks for your unwanted advice but please don't bother next time.

Hmmm.... good luck to you. You haven't a chance. The sharks are already circling around your blood in the water. (You gotta love Heather Hach!)

 

[Ohiogal]

haha. NO. but he didn't sell drugs (as far as I knew), and he seemed to work hard for a living. He honestly held a job and he was committed to helping to provide for his daughter. We BOTH were.

C'mon guys. Ok, let me rephrase what I wrote. When I found out what he did for sure was when she was about 1 year old. We separated about 2 years after that for good. She was 4 or so and he became more and more open and flashy about what he was doing within the same circle of people we knew.

So you were fine with him dealing drugs for 2 years before you decided to break up. And you can PROVE everything you say? Or is it just bitterness due to the fact that you have another man who you would PREFER as daddy?

 

[Ohiogal]

Around 1998, when my daughter was 4. Guess about 10 years ago.
(Remarried 7 years ago.)

But you were fine with being a drug dealer for a couple years. Says a lot about your character. Again, PROVE your allegations. If you can't, oh well. Your word means nothing. Credibility only gets you so far.

 

[Rguerrero2]

So you were fine with him dealing drugs for 2 years before you decided to break up. And you can PROVE everything you say? Or is it just bitterness due to the fact that you have another man who you would PREFER as daddy?

Oh my GOSH. You have serious issues. If I were fine with it, I would have stayed with him, lady. When he continued even after I gave him ultimatums, I LEFT. Obviously he was sneaking around and trying to hide it from me for 2 years and he wasn't nearly as big as he is now.
You do love to pick don't you? But I'm not biting your bait. I already said what I had to say to you and all of this childish picking from you is and was never the issue or why I logged onto this site. You've completely turned this around on what you think I may be thinking or feeling and that's just plain weird.
So enough already. Take some Prozac. Your advice is not even constructive criticism, you just want to be rude and sucker punch people that really need help with their situations.

 

[CourtClerk]

Actually, the questions that are being posed are for SURE to come up in a trial, and is exactly where I was going with MY line of questioning, however, I just took a different road to get the answers... and you answered them. Now I can go about answering your original post (and you won't like the response, I guarantee you). So before you get started, I am neither bitter, angry, childless or anything else you can imagine. Nor do I have the issues with my child you seem to. So while you're waiting on me to formulate my response, work on yours....

If you even remotely answer questions on the stand the way you do on this forum, you will be crushed in court, by even a mediocre attorney.

 

[supernanny]

Oh my GOSH. You have serious issues. If I were fine with it, I would have stayed with him, lady. When he continued even after I gave him ultimatums, I LEFT. Obviously he was sneaking around and trying to hide it from me for 2 years and he wasn't nearly as big as he is now.
You do love to pick don't you? But I'm not biting your bait. I already said what I had to say to you and all of this childish picking from you is and was never the issue or why I logged onto this site. You've completely turned this around on what you think I may be thinking or feeling and that's just plain weird.
So enough already. Take some Prozac. Your advice is not even constructive criticism, you just want to be rude and sucker punch people that really need help with their situations.

Uh, OG is a family law attorney, I am pretty sure she knows what she is talking about. She was trying to help you, but you obviously didn't like what she was saying.




Ok you left the guy eventually, but you still stayed with him for TWO years before you left him. So what OG is saying is it was ok to stay with him for those two years but all of sudden its not ok. You just didn't want to hear that.

Go pay a lawyer $400 for some advice instead of getting it free on here, maybe they will include a shoulder to cry in their fee.

 

[CourtClerk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas I have a 14 year old daughter with a man that is an open drug dealer.

Who was dealing drugs when you were with him and when you found out, you didn't IMMEDIATELY leave nor call the authorities to report his behavior. Hence, to an extent, you were ok with it.

We have joint custody through the attorney generals office with visitation and child support papers not enforced or notarized by a judge

.
If the AG's office was involved in creating the agreement, why aren't they enforcing it (at least where CS is concerned)

Here are the problems I am facing:*He has dealt drugs on occasion in front of my daughter.

Apparently, it seems he did it in front of you also. Why is this an issue now when it wasn't when you were first made aware of it? How many ultimatums did you give him and for how long?

Handled large amounts of drug money in front of my daughter.

Apparently, it seems he did it in front of you also. Why is this an issue now when it wasn't when you were first made aware of it? How many ultimatums did you give him and for how long?

She has been upset and told me about it but she was too afraid of him to want me to take it any further.

Why is it that you as a parent as letting your child control what you do? Why aren't you doing what is in her best interest? Why are you more concerned about your child being mad at you than you doing what is right? I guess since she's afraid, you will jeopardize her safety? How are you any better of a parent?

The visitations have continued because I have been afraid I would be held in some sort of contempt.

This is correct, you would. However, you could take the issue to court with proof (that you don't have).

*This man has his family, who happen to be millionaires, backing him up and supporting him and they cover his dealings with a family trucking business. His house, his vehicles, are all under his mothers name. His mother meddles and helps in every affair regarding child custody and child support, which he pays when he wants.

So? Since there has been no legal intervention, you are apparently ok with it.

He pays however much he wants, even when it's been ordered that he pay 400 a month.

And what have you done about that? Nothing? Ok.

He NEVER has her under health insurance and refuses to help or cooperate when it comes to paying for her medical bills.*

What does the order state regarding health insurance? It's pretty standard to say that when it is available at low or no cost, he is to provide it. Perhaps it's not available.

This man is big on the social scene and pretty much leaves her alone alot to go out and party or dumps her off wherever and doesn't let me know anything.

He is under no obligation to tell you when he goes out.

The most recent stunt was to dump her off at my mothers house without letting me know, my daughter doesn't call and tell me either because she knows shes punished when it comes to her being with me, due to her defyingly walking up and down a busy street after school with her friends and boyfriend without my permission.

This sentence makes no sense to me.

*None of the paperwork we have is enforced, from child support to child custody.

Why? And why are you using all these asteriks?

The problem I'm having now is my daughter is starting to rebel and play her parents against each other. One week she's crying to me about how mean her father is, the next week she's crying to him about how mean I am and there is this constant tug of war that he is reveling in.

This has more to do with the fact that she's a manipulative 14 year old girl (who obviously has you wrapped around her finger) than anything else.

She feels that since shes 14 she makes the rules and she can go with whoever she wants when she feels fit.

After the first time she gave you that notion, why didn't you give HER a reality check?

My situation:I have been remarried for 7 years and have a son, with another one on the way. Our relationship was pretty rocky from 2005 till now. I am now a stay at home mom, with full focus on my children and raising them. We have moved several times, but my children have ALWAYS remained with me. He uses the fact of my shaky marriage at one point, and instability in living arrangements as grounds that she is better off with him.

I agree that children need stability so they can have roots somewhere. Why do you keep uprooting your children? What is the reason for you moving your kids from place to place?

A drug dealer.Partier, and known drug user.

Known by whom? You've stated that he has never been arrested for drug dealing.

He has huge parties involving all of this.

People have parties. It's not against the law.

My household does not have any of that involved.

Your household tends to move with the wind though. How is that good for a child?

Please help me and let me know what I can do to fix this situation.

You can start by providing some stability to your children's household. Then you can work on parenting your daughter as it seems that she may be starting to get out of hand. Of course, we don't have a parenting forum, but you can find tons of them around.

 

[Rguerrero2]

But you were fine with being a drug dealer for a couple years. Says a lot about your character. Again, PROVE your allegations. If you can't, oh well. Your word means nothing. Credibility only gets you so far.

I never was fine with it, and I gave him a chance to get out of it before I left him. I guess it does say alot about my character that I was willing to give him a chance before tearing our family apart.


I am in the process of proving it, AS I SAID BEFORE. This takes time and tedious documentation and so forth (proof versus allegations is what I am trying to gather), but I know it is necessary because he'll probably have a wacked lawyer like you defending him and his rights. I know, I know all the criminals out there that sell and do drugs really deserve to be defended and their rights as a father, are FAR more important than that of a childs.

In the meantime, I will really try to be more sympathetic to his rights and just explain that to my 14 year old impressionable daughter everytime she has a question about why I let her go to a place like that. After all, his rights do come before ours.

Jesus.

 

[Rguerrero2]

Actually, the questions that are being posed are for SURE to come up in a trial, and is exactly where I was going with MY line of questioning, however, I just took a different road to get the answers... and you answered them. Now I can go about answering your original post (and you won't like the response, I guarantee you). So before you get started, I am neither bitter, angry, childless or anything else you can imagine. Nor do I have the issues with my child you seem to. So while you're waiting on me to formulate my response, work on yours....

If you even remotely answer questions on the stand the way you do on this forum, you will be crushed in court, by even a mediocre attorney.

And I sincerely thank you for that. It's not about me liking the posts from senior advisors, because I'm sure it will not all go my way. I actually APPRECIATE the truth and ALL CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.

It's just what you said though, that you took a different road to get the answers you needed, without all the unncessary rude comments like old gal Ohio or whoever she is, had to say. It's absurd and she's attacking and its so far off from the point at hand.

I also realize that I could not answer questions like that on the stand, that just takes a tad bit of common sense. I just didn't realize this was a "mock" trial to where I would be attacked with cruel little remarks that have nothing to do with what the issue is. Even a judge would have to eventually say her opinions are irrelevant to what this case is about.
When she answered without all the ignorant jabs, I sincerely was reading it, and saying ok, that makes sense, UNTIL I got to the childish parts.

Not being difficult about anything, there is just no need for the disrespect.