Can I take my child to Disney for vacation?

[JakeTheDad]

What is the name of your state? PA
Hello,
I have a 9 year old son with my ex-gf. We have joint custody but he resides with her. When it comes to visitation, she has fought me on EVERYTHING! Our Parent Coordinator, The Judge, My Attorney, even HER attorney disagree with most of her "reasons" as to why (for example)my son can't sleep over on Easter when he turns 12 "because he will still believe in the Easter Bunny"..it never ends..

In December, I plan to take my wife, our daughter (5 yrs old) and my inlaws to Disney in Florida for 5 days. The school is okay with this as long as the trip is educational. Both kids go to same school, both will miss 5 days of school. My lawyer contacted her lawyer & our parent coordinator. They all agree that this trip is a wonderful idea.

In addition to my regular visitation, my court order allowes "additional time" for me. My Ex will NOT, and I mean WILL NOT allow this vacation. I had to get an emergency court order to have my son at his half-sisters birthday party. (The kids have a wonderful bond to each other.)

Is there any real valid reason that she could convince the Judge not to allow my son on vacation with me & my family.? School? Airplane? Anything?
I just need to prepare myself for any issues she may have with this.
P.S. Court Order gives me 2 weeks vacation in summer, so I have taken him on Vacation before, just not on airplane.

THANKS IN ADVANCE!

 

[Ohiogal]

Get a court order allowing the time.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? PA
Is there any real valid reason that she could convince the Judge not to allow my son on vacation with me & my family.? School? Airplane? Anything?
I just need to prepare myself for any issues she may have with this.
P.S. Court Order gives me 2 weeks vacation in summer, so I have taken him on Vacation before, just not on airplane.

THANKS IN ADVANCE!

I think it will boil down to how the judge feels about the child missing school. Make sure that you have something in writing to prove that the school is ok with it.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

School?

Missing school will be the big factor in this. You need documentation from the school on this one. It depends on how the courts feel about school - mine stands firm that they will NOT force a parent to agree to missing school.

 

[JakeTheDad]

Thanks!

My attorney wants me to tell my ex about the vacation at our next cooperative parenting meeting next week. After that, my attorney will also file a petition with the judge for the trip. I have a letter/form from the school that I must complete and return back to the school "requesting" time off for vacation. It is a generic letter indicating the trip should be educational & the child must not have excessive absenses' from school. Pretty simple.

Other than that, I can not see a valid reason why I can not take my own child on vacation. It is difficult for me to imagine him not going, and having to explain to him, why I took his half-sister to Disney & not him. I have not told him of the trip yet, just in case the ex flipps out and tries to ruin it. I also can not deny my 5 year old going to Disney b/c my ex is unreasonable.
I am just anticipating the unknown**************What will she say??..What will she do???hopefully she will be more reasonable, just doubt it.....

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks!

My attorney wants me to tell my ex about the vacation at our next cooperative parenting meeting next week. After that, my attorney will also file a petition with the judge for the trip. I have a letter/form from the school that I must complete and return back to the school "requesting" time off for vacation. It is a generic letter indicating the trip should be educational & the child must not have excessive absenses' from school. Pretty simple.

Other than that, I can not see a valid reason why I can not take my own child on vacation. It is difficult for me to imagine him not going, and having to explain to him, why I took his half-sister to Disney & not him. I have not told him of the trip yet, just in case the ex flipps out and tries to ruin it. I also can not deny my 5 year old going to Disney b/c my ex is unreasonable.
I am just anticipating the unknown**************What will she say??..What will she do???hopefully she will be more reasonable, just doubt it.....

There isn't a problem with taking your child on vacation. If its your scheduled vacation period and the child is not in school, there is no problem at all.

The problem with this one is that the child is in school....therefore its going to boil down to the judges general attitude about a child missing school.

 

[Ohiogal]

There isn't a problem with taking your child on vacation. If its your scheduled vacation period and the child is not in school, there is no problem at all.

The problem with this one is that the child is in school....therefore its going to boil down to the judges general attitude about a child missing school.

And quite frankly Disney can definitely be considered an educational trip. There are homeschooling manuals regarding educational opportunities at Disney.

 

[wileybunch]

I wouldn't have a problem taking my kids out of school for a family trip and I wouldn't have a problem with my ex doing it when he gets to the point he has that time (he has a graduated visitation plan). We will be in your shoes in another year or two when we want to take my kids and my husband's youngest on an east coast trip (NY city and upstate, DC) that will likely conflict with school. I expect his ex not to be super cooperative and I'm not willing to have husband fight it in court. Either she says daughter can go and miss school, she doesn't agree and we do it during school breaks that coincide (she's not in year round; other kids are), or we go w/o her. I really want to take her so of course hope that we can, but I can't withhold things from other kids if we can't thread the eye of a needle, either. Are you willing to go to court to get an order? If not, are you going to go w/o her?

 

[nextwife]

We did Disney in early Oct., and kiddo DID miss a couple days of school. And the school was fine with it. So was the school of the other child whose family we went with, and it was educational.

I would never go to Disney during "season", when one goes off season:

a. it is affordable.

b. the lines are short or non-existant and you can see everything

c. the airfare is cheaper.

My parents had us miss a couple days of school for virtually every family vacation because of when my dad could leave. It was never a problem, and it did not mess up any of our lives.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

It all depends on the school. My daughter's middle school now has a zero-tolerance for 'vacation' days off.

 

[LdiJ]

It all depends on the school. My daughter's middle school now has a zero-tolerance for 'vacation' days off.

My daughter's elementary school was fine with it, but both her middle school and her high school did not allow it either.

 

[CJane]

I'm really unclear on whether or not this 5 days is Dad's, or if he's calling it 'additional time' per the order.

If it's 'additional time'... what's the stipulation attached to that wrt notice that it's being taken, agreement, etc.

Is it impossible to incorporate Christmas Break into this 5 days so fewer school days are being taken?

My school would allow it. But man... the kids would pay dearly because they wouldn't get their homework in advance and would have to make everything up w/in 3 days upon return - as well as keeping up w/regular school work on those days.

 

[JakeTheDad]

Thanks for all the advice!
My CO reads: "ADDITIONAL TIME- The parents understand that the specific times set forth are the minimum periods of partial custody set forth for the father. The parties may mutually agree to additional periods of partial custody for the Father as would best serve the interest of the minor child."

The only problem is she has/will never agree to additional time, that is why I always need our attorneys/parent coordinator to constantly be involved.

On the advice of our travel agent, we chose the week of Dec 15-20. Our Disney travel agent told us it is soooo busy during Christmas break, the kids would miss also of attractions due to heavy lines.

We plan on taking all their schoolwork & homework for the flight. ALso, the school guidance counselor at their school said, since this is the week before the Christmas holiday, new lessons will not be introduced at this time. And the kids are only in Kindergarden & 2nd grade! We have plenty of time during the school break to play catch-up! And I can not imagine the thought of my son not being with me, so not sure what to do if he is not allowed to go.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks for all the advice!
My CO reads: "ADDITIONAL TIME- The parents understand that the specific times set forth are the minimum periods of partial custody set forth for the father. The parties may mutually agree to additional periods of partial custody for the Father as would best serve the interest of the minor child."

The only problem is she has/will never agree to additional time, that is why I always need our attorneys/parent coordinator to constantly be involved.

On the advice of our travel agent, we chose the week of Dec 15-20. Our Disney travel agent told us it is soooo busy during Christmas break, the kids would miss also of attractions due to heavy lines.

We plan on taking all their schoolwork & homework for the flight. ALso, the school guidance counselor at their school said, since this is the week before the Christmas holiday, new lessons will not be introduced at this time. And the kids are only in Kindergarden & 2nd grade! We have plenty of time during the school break to play catch-up! And I can not imagine the thought of my son not being with me, so not sure what to do if he is not allowed to go.

Again, like I said, I think its all going to boil down to what your particular judge thinks about kids missing school. Obviously the school is ok with it, so you don't have that hurdle to deal with...so its honestly going to boil down to what the judge thinks.....and that is a bit of a crapshoot. Some judges are totally ok with it if the school district doesn't object, some judges won't do it unless the parents agree. You won't know until you try.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

See if the school has an *independent Study Program*. My daughter is on it for two weeks. It is a contract with you and the school and no day's are counted absent. The teachers give the work for the time off.

look into that, it might settle your X down a bit.