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What is the name of your state? CA

Where do I post a question regarding a Civil Restraining Order? I don't see a dedicated category... long story short...

I filed restraining order against ex-hubs pregnant girlfriend - judge ordered both of us to stay away from one another up for review 3/11

She violated her promise to court by contacting me and showing to custody exchange and filed ANOTHER false police report against me (or attempted to... I have a premise history on my home due to the multitude of false reports coming from ex hub and girlfriend following his being charged for criminal contempt of DVRO)

On 12/31 she mailed me a Notice of Motion and the proof of service asking that my exhusband be relieved from paying child support all together.... 1/4 she showed to custody exchange and was hiding in the backseat of his car... weird.

Anyway.. just got served with a restraining order from her claiming that I violently threatened her and she fears for her unborn childs safety...

Judge denied - set hearing for 1/17 - is this possible since she is ALREADY the Respondent in a case pending?
 


TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Man do I hate to suggest this, but can you two make your exchanges at the police station? Then I would think that she would have to stay away since she technically would have NO business in the exchange of the child.
 
Yes...

In fact ... he JUST had me served with this insane motion to cease paying child support all together as well as asking me to travel 1/2 way to his town for visitation exchanges during my work day... the responding officer to the 1/4 incident (who found that the situation that my ex hub and the girlfriend called into the station was A. A sneak attack getting around the premise history and B. Impossible since they claimed that she was dropped off at a church around the corner yet it was the very night that trees were falling over because of storms - his mom lives 7 blocks away so she could have waited there AND she's pregnant and no decent man would drop a pregnant woman off at a dark church in the rain and wind of up to 40 mph... PLUS.. she crawled over the seats from the rear of the van into the passenger side... I saw her and they KNEW at that point that she'd been caught.

ITS ABSOLUTE INSANITY!!!!

Our three year old must have been absolutely confused when this woman was hiding in the car... quite frankly that really really p**sses me off.

Question: I'm HOPING that the court will see the insanity of all of these filings and the lack of coincidence in that they increase right before my ex husband is to be seen for violations of the judgment against him? How can I - without sounding like a madwoman - pose this to the court in a reasonable manner using verbiage that will not make me sound bitter or indiferent?
 
I forgot...

At the hearing approaching on 1/17 which is the restraining order that the girlfriend has just filed... this has nothing to do with my custody issues with our daughter... and everything to do with just getting this woman to stay the heck out of it.... the hearing for the modification of visitation is not until 1/28

But again... how can she file a civil restraining order against me when she is the respondent in a restraining order filed against her which is up for review on 3/11 (the minute order states that we both assured the courts to stay away from one another - yet on 1/4 I came home to a mailing from her, signed as well as the fact that she showed to the custody exchange - hiding - )

and by the way... I fully plan on NOT fighting a restraining order.. at the last hearing the judge, to my surprise, refused to issue one in spite of the fact that I asked it to be mutual - I would like her claims (her duplicate claims) that I harm children REMOVED from any legal documents because this is now her fourth attempt at claiming this - other than that... more than happy to get out of the epicenter of their obsession with me and this whole mess
 
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I've just read

through this entire restraining order... she has ONCE again made an accusation that I harm children... HER children...

Its absolute insanity - but this goes hand in hand with their complaint made with CPS and the vast other false reports with the police department which propelled the Premise History...

I understand that it's their RIGHT to claim these things but how on earth do I get the court to see the insanity of it?
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
At the hearing approaching on 1/17 which is the restraining order that the girlfriend has just filed... this has nothing to do with my custody issues with our daughter... and everything to do with just getting this woman to stay the heck out of it.... the hearing for the modification of visitation is not until 1/28

But again... how can she file a civil restraining order against me when she is the respondent in a restraining order filed against her which is up for review on 3/11 (the minute order states that we both assured the courts to stay away from one another - yet on 1/4 I came home to a mailing from her, signed as well as the fact that she showed to the custody exchange - hiding - )

and by the way... I fully plan on NOT fighting a restraining order.. at the last hearing the judge, to my surprise, refused to issue one in spite of the fact that I asked it to be mutual - I would like her claims (her duplicate claims) that I harm children REMOVED from any legal documents because this is now her fourth attempt at claiming this - other than that... more than happy to get out of the epicenter of their obsession with me and this whole mess

It is a different case. Different situations. So she can file. But you need to calm down.She can claim it all she wants but she has to PROVE it. You will not get that removed from legal documents. What you can do is show that she cannot prove her allegations.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I have nothing to add, except to say WOW...I am sorry that you have to deal with such insanity.:eek:
 

casa

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? CA

Where do I post a question regarding a Civil Restraining Order? I don't see a dedicated category... long story short...

I filed restraining order against ex-hubs pregnant girlfriend - judge ordered both of us to stay away from one another up for review 3/11

She violated her promise to court by contacting me and showing to custody exchange and filed ANOTHER false police report against me (or attempted to... I have a premise history on my home due to the multitude of false reports coming from ex hub and girlfriend following his being charged for criminal contempt of DVRO)

On 12/31 she mailed me a Notice of Motion and the proof of service asking that my exhusband be relieved from paying child support all together.... 1/4 she showed to custody exchange and was hiding in the backseat of his car... weird.

Anyway.. just got served with a restraining order from her claiming that I violently threatened her and she fears for her unborn childs safety...

Judge denied - set hearing for 1/17 - is this possible since she is ALREADY the Respondent in a case pending?
You can post this in the Domestic Violence Forum re; the ROs/TROs.

Don't freak out~ CA judges are used to X's saying every horrible thing about one another. The motion to cease support is a doozy...for HIM. He's not thinking rationally if he believes that will fly, because it won't. :cool:
 

Ozark_Sophist

Senior Member
I would bring the evidence (the letter, police report, etc) to the hearing on 1/17. Hopefully, the judge will let her have it. Also, I would fight the RO. Given her past history, she will do whatever she can to have you violate it. Best to be proactive and not have the RO against you.
 

casa

Senior Member
If you are filing documents/evidence...do it NOW. There is time limit (amount of court days) prior to the hearing within which you must file in order for it to be considered. And you must also serve copies upon all parties (& proof of service to the court) prior as well.

There are service instructions at the ca.gov sites & also at your local courthouse.
 
I didn't get served until Weds night at 8 - so I've composed the response and had a mailed service done but I couldn't take the tme off of work to get to the courthouse... I'll go monday but the hearing is thursday... we'll see how it goes... I have the reports, the letters and her filings -
 
What is the name of your state? CA

I filed restraining order against ex-hubs pregnant girlfriend - judge ordered both of us to stay away from one another up for review 3/11

She violated her promise to court by contacting me and showing to custody exchange and filed ANOTHER false police report against me (or attempted to... I have a premise history on my home due to the multitude of false reports coming from ex hub and girlfriend following his being charged for criminal contempt of DVRO)

On 12/31 she mailed me a Notice of Motion and the proof of service asking that my exhusband be relieved from paying child support all together.... 1/4 she showed to custody exchange and was hiding in the backseat of his car... weird.
Ozark_Sophist Given her past history, she will do whatever she can to have you violate it.
I also like the suggestion of doing exchanges at the police station, but if you can't, bring cell phone that takes pics or camera. Catch her in the act. That ought to be worth something.

Am I right Senior Members or can pics not be used in court?
 
It's absolutely EXHAUSTING

I'm so tired of having to play this game with them!!! What my DREAM will be is that the judge for her harassment suit sees clear through to the bottom line that she never should have been there ANYWAY and defaults to awarding me the restraining order I'd initially requested to begin with.

Then at the hearing with my exhusband (the one where he requests to stop support as well as to skew visitation times asking that I travel an hour during my work day) that THAT judge will flat be SICK of him and all of these court dates.

Last year when my exhusband was doing something quite similar to this (requesting irrational changes to our orders) the judge had told him that if he didn't stop being so difficult that he'd take away his visitation all together. If we have to goto mediation than I will just have an addendum added to the visitation and custody orders that he is to not bring his girlfriend with him... how ridiculous is that?

So I'm REALLY hoping that my exhusband pipes out and acts a fool.

QUESTION My exhusband is defaulting to the clause in the custodcy and visitation order that states that "child shall have open access to parents at all times". He has abused this by calling me frequently leaving messages of an intimidating nature to me regarding "as per court orders" "I'm taking you back to court". When I sent him notification that I had changed my cell phone number and that I will not provide him with the new one I added to that statement that my fax machine will be on due to the fact that I home office. (this is so out of hand and insane) - the visitation order reads that the CHILD will have open access to both parents at all times NOT that the PARENTS will have open access to the child at all times - our daughter is THREE and not hardly at a stage in her life where she can freely go and pick up the phone to call her dad. When she DOES speak with him over the phone she is non-attentive and I just receive calls from him stating that "as per court orders I MUST be allowed to speak with her"...

The whole mess is NONSENSE!!!!
 
In major trouble here....

What is the name of your state? CA

Where do I post a question regarding a Civil Restraining Order? I don't see a dedicated category... long story short...

I filed restraining order against ex-hubs pregnant girlfriend - judge ordered both of us to stay away from one another up for review 3/11

She violated her promise to court by contacting me and showing to custody exchange and filed ANOTHER false police report against me (or attempted to... I have a premise history on my home due to the multitude of false reports coming from ex hub and girlfriend following his being charged for criminal contempt of DVRO)

On 12/31 she mailed me a Notice of Motion and the proof of service asking that my exhusband be relieved from paying child support all together.... 1/4 she showed to custody exchange and was hiding in the backseat of his car... weird.

Anyway.. just got served with a restraining order from her claiming that I violently threatened her and she fears for her unborn childs safety...

Judge denied - set hearing for 1/17 - is this possible since she is ALREADY the Respondent in a case pending?

Well, I've now had to retain an attorney. After the incident where my exhusband brought his girlfriend with him to a custody exchange - he phoned the police and they'd built a pretty colorful story of a car chase and my threatening to beat her up. Officer had responded - saw from my court documentation that she wasn't even supposed to be near a custody exchange, heard my side of the story and I thought the matter had been dropped.

Back in September I had filed a restraining order against his girlfriend due to the fact that she had phoned my job, daycare, doctors and kept coming to custody exchanges and was a party to all of the false reports of officers coming to my home - he had us agree that there would be no contact from either one of us to the other.

Last weds. his girlfriend had me served with a restraining order coupled with a pretty dramatic and imaginitive narrative of how she feels so threatened by me and that her children and unborn child are in immediate danger.

I filed my response with witnesses that she was the one coming where she knew I would be - letter from my employer showing her phone call to them saying that I harm children - letters from my exhusbands former employer showing that it was his girlfriend (who was also employed in the same office) that was intercepting wage assignment orders for child support and sending them back unopened, the excerpt of one of her many filings under my divorce where she had transcripted out the initial threat "hacking someones head off with a knife" and the addendum that it was only "meant to be funny". (this is where this whole disaster started and I'd filed contempt charges against my exhusband for violation of DVRO - this is when the insane court campaign began) We went to court yesterday.

He listened to her story - he addressed me - I interrupted him and it all went downhill from there. He scolded me quite strongly and told me that I was wasting the time of the court because there are matters at hand that involved children and the whole she stole my boyfriend was childish. He obvioulsy had not read my response.

He granted her restraining order - yet refused to help me close the looophole and simply remind her to not do anything to purposefully get me to violate, i.e., come to custody exchanges. He said that since he didn't have the initial restraining order filed against her in front of him he would not grant the other.

In court she said that I called HER and told HER that she was being watched and said that she felt that she was being stalked. That's not what happened. What I did was called my EX HUSBANDS cell phone and told him that my family watches during custody exchanges and they've seen his girlfriend with him during two other exchanges outside of the one that they caused this last court case over - and to leave me alone. That is when he went to Atwater police (because Modesto police have placed a premise history on my home due to all of their false complaints they'd sent into 911) and I was told that I had broken the law.

Judge told me not to call HER house ever again. Because I'd made him angry he wouldn't even let me tell him that it was my exhusbands cell phone NOT hers.

To complicate matters worse. I'm ordered to allow telephone contact with my exhusband and our three year old daughter. Since the phone call from Atwater police I have had my home line unplugged and refuse to answer it to my exhusband because I am NOT placing myself in a situation that they will obviously use to claim violation of restraining orders. I'm not the most peaceful person at this point and I was VERY aggitated with my exhusband for continually causing situations and then taking the baby to the police station during his visitaiton time and file complaints... again.

This is why I am retaining an attorney to help me - these two are going to do all that they can to put me in jail and that judge has empowered them now with the ability to do that.

You'd asked to keep you posted and this is where I am. Kalea and I have three custody exchanges between now and the 28th which is the hearing that he perpetuated to modify our custody orders. It is at this hearing where he will most certainly present the fact that I now have a restraining order against me and I can certainly guarantee that his girlfriend will show.

This is an absolute nightmare.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Its good that you got an attorney. The problem with your evidence is that it is NOT admissible evidence and is considered hearsay. Those people should have been brought to testify.
 

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