Step-Mother from HELL & going slong with it!!

[TheGeekess]

$1500....is what it cost me to fight DHR on false reports from the NCP, you would think since it's already agreed upon, I could get it cheaper. However, Everyone is tell me the same aprox amount. If I was to go this route and could I ask for my fees back from the NCP in the court order as well? I mean I am giving him his rights after all. He should pay atleast the very least half of it. Don't you think?

You can ask the lawyer.... I did so with my second divorce (no children), but not sure if they'd do so for a custody case.

 

[majomom1]

I'm about broke at this point, after spending money to fin off DHR after their false reports. I just wonder how much it will really cost me to get this down. $2000, $3000? Could I ask the court to have NCP help with the cost of this?

Unfortunately you will probably not be able to get NCP charged with any of of your legal fees. Here again, this is where a court order will help you in the future. With the court order, NCP may be charged with attorney fees if he is in contempt.

Howeve, the NCP will more than likely be charged with a portion of any GAL fees.

 

[wnbama]

Ask that step-mom be told that she is to have NO contact with you and ALL communications go by e-mail, cellphone or regular mail RR.

I sent both of them a certified letter telling them there was to be no more harrassment from either of them, the minute step-mom got letter she called, and telling she was now turning me into DHR in the new county. I filed a police report for harrassment as soon as I hung up the phone. DHR even told NCP that this needed to be between myself and the NCP, that the step-mom should have nothing to do with it. This women is so "nutz" that she even had the nerve to tell me that because she has a daughter, by my sons father, which inturns make my son have a half sister, that it was her business! I said NO, YOU have no blood relation to my son, so therefore it's not your business! This women is a a volacano waiting to explose.

Tell the judge about the calls to DHS and that this is also creating turmoil for the child and that he is more interested in disturbing you than raising a healthy and happy child.

I have a 15 page timeline of just the events that have happen since Feb. 18, 2007, starting with the assult from step-mom's brother, when they refused to give me my son back at the end of one weekend last year and he dragged me off the property stating I was trespassing, I ended up in the ER and guess what? The Police called them told them it would be in there best interest to bring the child to the station right then, it was amazing how fast they got there with my son. These people will show up at my sons soccer games and start a fight over stupid stuff! These people are sick, sick, sick!

 

[Silverplum]

Are there any more legal questions, or are we just bitchin' now?

 

[escape2paradise]

I have a 15 page timeline of just the events that have happen since Feb. 18, 2007, starting with the assult from step-mom's brother, when they refused to give me my son back at the end of one weekend last year and he dragged me off the property stating I was trespassing, I ended up in the ER and guess what? The Police called them told them it would be in there best interest to bring the child to the station right then, it was amazing how fast they got there with my son. These people will show up at my sons soccer games and start a fight over stupid stuff! These people are sick, sick, sick!

Your lucky that your X is easily intimidated by the police. I can assure you if he had not brought your son back when he did, the police would have ended their involvement right then. They would have informed you that this was a "civil matter" and that you would have to go to court and get a court order to get your son back. Not smart to allow visitation without an order.

If you want to avoid the legal fees, work out an agreed plan with dad and submit it to the court. Sounds like you already have an agreement, tell X you think it best if you submit the agreement to the court.

 

[wnbama]

Are there any more legal questions, or are we just bitchin' now?

Sorry, I got side tracked....., Please forgive me.

 

[wnbama]

Your lucky that your X is easily intimidated by the police. I can assure you if he had not brought your son back when he did, the police would have ended their involvement right then. They would have informed you that this was a "civil matter" and that you would have to go to court and get a court order to get your son back. Not smart to allow visitation without an order.

Question: Someone told me that becuase we was never married and I took him to court for CS that the court made me the CP and that meant I had physical custody. Can anyone clear this up for me? If so, how would I prove that I am the CP?
If you want to avoid the legal fees, work out an agreed plan with dad and submit it to the court. Sounds like you already have an agreement, tell X you think it best if you submit the agreement to the court.

I like the way you put that, I will approach him in the same manner and see if he takes the bait! Keep your fingers crossed!

 

[SMinNJ]

I like the way you put that, I will approach him in the same manner and see if he takes the bait! Keep your fingers crossed!

Simply put, the fact that you were not married when the baby was born generally makes you the ONLY legal parent of the child. Dad generally has to go to court to prove paternity and request legal standing before he has any.

 

[wnbama]

Simply put, the fact that you were not married when the baby was born generally makes you the ONLY legal parent of the child. Dad generally has to go to court to prove paternity and request legal standing before he has any.

He sign all the paternity paper work at the hospital when our son was born, DHR offered for him to have a DNA test done, he turned it down, sign paternity paperwork there as well stating it was his son. And he is the only signature on the birth cert. (I know, I know that makes not differance) I have copies of all of this paper work as well. I doubt very seriously he would ever say it wasn't his, but you never know, with these people! But I would tell him to look at his my son's half sister( his other child by step-mom) and tell me they wasn't related...if you put those two baby pics next to each other they could be twins and they were born 5 1/2 yrs apart.

I think I will approach him with..I think it would be in the best interest of both of us and our son, if we put this visitation plan in writing and submit it to the court, and offer to pay half? Does that sound fair? Not sure if he will do it, but sure worth a try.

 

[wnbama]

UPDATE and Question

Update from Feb to NOW:

I got a TRO on NCP in Feb in St. Clair Cty (County A). He filed for his visitation rights in Jefferson Cty (County B) and I was served in March for court date of July 21st. Went to court in April on the TRO in Judge held the TRO over till the July 21st court date and sent it to the Judge for County B "so the Judge there will be fully aware of what is happening with NCP". The TRO covers me but not my son. he is to have no contact with me of any kind.

My son has talked to the NCP 2 times since this was put in place. Son wanted to call his Daddy, so I had bought him a pre-paid phone back in Jan. 2008, so his dad or him would not have to go through me to talk to one another.

TODAY: I rec'd a letter stating:

CP
**Summer Visitation**

I'm sending this letter to you for summer visitation to being on July 1st at 6:00p.m. and I will keep him until August 1st at 6:00 p.m. You can meet me at the food gaint parking lot at 6:00 the 1st for pick-up and drop-off.

I will be sending your Attorney a copy and I have a copy for my self. Tell son I lived the Fathers Day Card and key chain. I will see you on July 1st 2008 at 6:00.

Sincerely,
NCP

This is postmarked yesterday and I rec'd it CRR in POBox today. Do I respond to this at all? I mean today is July 1st.....Isn't this a little late to be sending me a letter?

 

[TheGeekess]

wnbama, until there is a court ordered signed for visitation, tell him he can pound sand. I had to do that to The Child's father until I got the court order signed outlining visitation.

 

[LdiJ]

Update from Feb to NOW:

I got a TRO on NCP in Feb in St. Clair Cty (County A). He filed for his visitation rights in Jefferson Cty (County B) and I was served in March for court date of July 21st. Went to court in April on the TRO in Judge held the TRO over till the July 21st court date and sent it to the Judge for County B "so the Judge there will be fully aware of what is happening with NCP". The TRO covers me but not my son. he is to have no contact with me of any kind.

My son has talked to the NCP 2 times since this was put in place. Son wanted to call his Daddy, so I had bought him a pre-paid phone back in Jan. 2008, so his dad or him would not have to go through me to talk to one another.

TODAY: I rec'd a letter stating:

CP
**Summer Visitation**

I'm sending this letter to you for summer visitation to being on July 1st at 6:00p.m. and I will keep him until August 1st at 6:00 p.m. You can meet me at the food gaint parking lot at 6:00 the 1st for pick-up and drop-off.

I will be sending your Attorney a copy and I have a copy for my self. Tell son I lived the Fathers Day Card and key chain. I will see you on July 1st 2008 at 6:00.

Sincerely,
NCP

This is postmarked yesterday and I rec'd it CRR in POBox today. Do I respond to this at all? I mean today is July 1st.....Isn't this a little late to be sending me a letter?

There are all kinds of things wrong about that letter. He is not to contact you at all, and that was contact. He could have just gone through your attorney.

He knows there are no visitation orders. You have a July 21st court date to decide visitation.

He also mailed it far too late to be reasonable. Make sure that you keep the envelope with the postmark.

Contact your attorney for advice on how to handle it. Its wierd that dad would even try something like that postmarked on the last day of June.

 

[wnbama]

There are all kinds of things wrong about that letter. He is not to contact you at all, and that was contact. He could have just gone through your attorney.

He knows there are no visitation orders. You have a July 21st court date to decide visitation.

He also mailed it far too late to be reasonable. Make sure that you keep the envelope with the postmark.

Contact your attorney for advice on how to handle it. Its wierd that dad would even try something like that postmarked on the last day of June.

I did talk to my attorney's office, they are the ones that called me and let me know it was in the mail. One of the ladies in his office called and ask me if I had rec'd the letter, I said no, so I just happen to be on lunch and had time to run to the PO Box to get it, if they wouldn't have called, I might not have got it till this weekend, becuase I dont' always go to the PO Box everyday. The attorney was out and they just wanted me to be aware of it, he would not be back in the office till next week.

Yes, I have a ALL the letters they have EVER sent me....in a nice safe place!

Keep in mind Step-Mother works for the Post Office, so she knew I would get it the next day. For Father's Day, she mailed me a card and told me to have my son sign it and send it back to HER! My son had picked out his Father's Day card a few week prior and a gift as well...We was just waiting on time to pass to mail it to him. (I even let my son address it and write his daddy a note...too sweet!)

TheGeekess wnbama, until there is a court ordered signed for visitation, tell him he can pound sand. I had to do that to The Child's father until I got the court order signed outlining visitation.

I am not about to let him get visitation until the Judge sets the court Order to do so, just wanted to make sure I'm not going to get reamed from the Judge for NOT making son available.

 

[Zephyr]

Guess dad is gonna be lonely in the giant parking lot tonight...

 

[TheGeekess]

Guess dad is gonna be lonely in the giant parking lot tonight...

Maybe I should go by and give him clue by four.