I am so done with fighting

[penelope10]

But it IS in the best interests of the adults... why doesn't THAT matter????

IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!

LOL! Fortunately, it doesn't matter one hill of beans what's best for the adults.

And I just love the fact that a poster would suggest that a Judge in TX would say to a parent, "Okie Dokie, I'm gonna let you terminate your rights because the situation is making your life hard."

I was a young divorced parent with two very small children for many years. I was totally responsible financially and emotionally for my kiddos. And you know something, I would NEVER give up those years. NEVER. Because those are some of the happiest memories I have. And I know that my eldest child feels exactly the same way because she talks about those years. I'd come home from work totally exhausted, pick up the kiddos, and feed them. Then we'd turn on the radio and dance together to 80's music almost every night. I can still remember Bub at about 18 months of age shaking his little booty to the B-52s, etc. And I remember going to K-Mart and Walmart and putting clothes and toys on lay away because I didn't have any credit cards or money. It was exciting for us, every time I made a payment, I'd show them on the calendar how close we were to getting the stuff out. It was a fun process.

I have a really crappy parent who at one time suggested that I put my kids up in foster care. (Not because I was doing anything wrong, but because I was struggling financially etc.) He thought the kids made my life too hard, and I could get them back once I got on my feet. Let me tell you, I don't have a close relationship with that parent to this day. (And I certainly did not follow his advice).

My children were worth the "inconvenience." They still are, and will forever be, the greatest gift I have ever received.

 

[MichaCA]

Sometimes I think it IS much easier to raise children on one's own than deal with a super difficult ex, and the court system regarding the childrens' well being. Its hard to judge until one has walked in the other persons shoes.

That being said, I would not give up either. You've got the cards stacked against you, get the support you NEED and work through this legal process step by step.

 

[Ohiogal]

If there is not another party willing to adopt said child, a Judge in TX is NOT going to allow a parent to sign away their parental rights and obligations. Why? Because it is not in the BEST INTERESTS OF THE CHILD.

Carrie West was whining that she wants daddy to go away so her dear sainted bedmate could adopt. So hey this OP apparently has that option.

 

[penelope10]

Sometimes I think it IS much easier to raise children on one's own than deal with a super difficult ex, and the court system regarding the childrens' well being. Its hard to judge until one has walked in the other persons shoes.

That being said, I would not give up either. You've got the cards stacked against you, get the support you NEED and work through this legal process step by step.

I dealt with a super difficult ex at the same time that I was raising our kiddos. So I am sympathetic to those who deal with a difficult ex. The point of the story is that I never gave up on my children or on myself.

 

[truebluemd]

OP u and mom r both jerks but jus speaking on ujr situation ur going to have to suck it up and deal with mom. u need to ur reaction also affects the child. and ur wife is a jerk if she suppors ur decision to abandon ur child

 

[chrisstansberry]

My wife does not agree.....Its just taken alot of money which is running out. I feel I have gotten no where and she is not doing what she is suppose to and walks away yet I am always getting pounded. I am tired of the favorite game

 

[Just Blue]

OP u and mom r both jerks but jus speaking on ujr situation ur going to have to suck it up and deal with mom. u need to ur reaction also affects the child. and ur wife is a jerk if she suppors ur decision to abandon ur child

Why are you in "text-speak"??...Don't. Please.

 

[CJane]

You 'expressed anger' and CPS was called and your visits became supervised?

I think I found the huge-ass hole in your story.

 

[chrisstansberry]

Am I not suppose to express anger one someone with holds my daughter for my COURT ORDERD visits? Am I suppose to sit back and just be all happy go go and act like nothing happen? I am not an ass-hole. CPS was called I did 12 supervised visits at an hour each the court changed it and she is still not following the rules. If I can get punished why not her? I see favortism for the mother thats all I see. Yes I have made mistakes I have corrected them and have proven myself to more then one thats why I got my visits back.

 

[wileybunch]

Are we dancing around the elephant in the room?
I "express anger" on a daily basis, but no one's restricting access to my kids so perhaps you can be more clear what that actually means.

 

[stealth2]

You'd have to go back through his older posts (which we all know *every*one is going to do ), but as I recall, he expressed anger by threatening her (something like "I'll kill her"?) in front of the counselor. At the time, I thought it was a bit of an overreaction, but apparently the court found the concern warranted.

 

[wileybunch]

Ah yes, good memory. The judge ordered the supervised visits after the comment so OP, at least stop being in denial, it's not like CPS just swooped in and changed rules on you, there was a hearing on this and the supervised visits set. You no doubt have a Mom that's messing with you a lot, but you have got to keep your act together here because you cannot afford to come unraveled again in any way. And, honestly, Mom may have some good reason for some of her actions here so keep in mind you have a reputation now to live down.

Expect that Mom will continue to go right up to the line and even violate the COs. And, when she does, you go back to court over. Don't get so frustrated you feel you have to take matters into your own hands -- or mouth. The judge will do that for you.

 

[Ohiogal]

Being done with fighting does NOT equate with walking away from your child OP. Quit fighting and just state to the court the facts. Present your case. Quit making everything a fight. Because quite frankly, not everything is worth a fight.

 

[stealth2]

Quit making everything a fight. Because quite frankly, not everything is worth a fight.

Amen! I know it can be hard to realize early on, but there comes a time when you have to find that line and realize not EVERYthing needs to be a fight. I have a (potential) situation (that OG is aware of) with my ex. I would bet dollars to donuts that it will play out as I expect. But, ya know? When I consider what my (unjustified) payout would be vs the stress of dealing with the ex... Just not worth it. My kids deserve some peace, as do I. (So no, OG, I didn't send the letter.)

And this is what you need to learn, OP. What's worth fighting over, and what isn't.

 

[chrisstansberry]

I am not trying to make everything a fight. I want to much to be a part of my daughters life. I feel in the end it will all work in my favor because it will catch up with her at the Jury trail in July. I just never thought it would take this long. Here is another question. I found out in March 08 that she was my daughter because I filled thru the AG. Her mother is now wanting the last 2 years of back child support. How does that work in the state of Tx? I started making child support payments in April 08