Need advice

[nana99]

My daughter has custody of her 20 month old daughter. We moved to NH from TN in August, the childs father has not seen her since August and does not pay child support. He has informed her that he was moving to NH in a week or so. He has no job and has said he is moving in with someone he met through craiglist. He has never met this man in person and knows nothing about him. The man however is letting him move in with him, with no job or means to pay rent. The father has at times suggested that he was going to live in his car while he was looking for a job. The problem is not with him seeing the child, the court order says that he does get her 2 weeks every other month, the problem is if he has not provided an address or anything of where he will be, does she have to allow the child to go. The other problem is he is moving in with a man that he knows nothing about and taking a child there. Something about this all sounds fishy but just wanted some input

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

My daughter has custody of her 20 month old daughter. We moved to NH from TN in August, the childs father has not seen her since August and does not pay child support. He has informed her that he was moving to NH in a week or so. He has no job and has said he is moving in with someone he met through craiglist. He has never met this man in person and knows nothing about him. The man however is letting him move in with him, with no job or means to pay rent. The father has at times suggested that he was going to live in his car while he was looking for a job. The problem is not with him seeing the child, the court order says that he does get her 2 weeks every other month, the problem is if he has not provided an address or anything of where he will be, does she have to allow the child to go. The other problem is he is moving in with a man that he knows nothing about and taking a child there. Something about this all sounds fishy but just wanted some input

Honestly your daughter is the one who should be asking these questions. I understand that you are concerned for your grandchild, believe me, I do. But you are a legal stranger.

Having said that, has 'dad' been adjudicated as dad? Are there support orders in place? If so, was visitation ordered? How old is the child?

 

[Silverplum]

Please have your daughter create her own account and ask questions about her own legal situation, if she wishes to discuss it here.

https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/newbies-please-read-before-posting-387214.html

My daughter has custody of her 20 month old daughter. We moved to NH from TN in August, the childs father has not seen her since August and does not pay child support. He has informed her that he was moving to NH in a week or so. He has no job and has said he is moving in with someone he met through craiglist. He has never met this man in person and knows nothing about him. The man however is letting him move in with him, with no job or means to pay rent. The father has at times suggested that he was going to live in his car while he was looking for a job. The problem is not with him seeing the child, the court order says that he does get her 2 weeks every other month, the problem is if he has not provided an address or anything of where he will be, does she have to allow the child to go. The other problem is he is moving in with a man that he knows nothing about and taking a child there. Something about this all sounds fishy but just wanted some input

 

[Just Blue]

My daughter has custody of her 20 month old daughter. We moved to NH from TN in August, the childs father has not seen her since August and does not pay child support. He has informed her that he was moving to NH in a week or so. He has no job and has said he is moving in with someone he met through craiglist. He has never met this man in person and knows nothing about him. The man however is letting him move in with him, with no job or means to pay rent. The father has at times suggested that he was going to live in his car while he was looking for a job. The problem is not with him seeing the child, the court order says that he does get her 2 weeks every other month, the problem is if he has not provided an address or anything of where he will be, does she have to allow the child to go. The other problem is he is moving in with a man that he knows nothing about and taking a child there. Something about this all sounds fishy but just wanted some input

Give this site address to your daughter so that she may handle her own custody issues.

Thanks.

 

[Isis1]

My daughter has custody of her 20 month old daughter. We moved to NH from TN in August, the childs father has not seen her since August and does not pay child support. He has informed her that he was moving to NH in a week or so. He has no job and has said he is moving in with someone he met through craiglist. He has never met this man in person and knows nothing about him. The man however is letting him move in with him, with no job or means to pay rent. The father has at times suggested that he was going to live in his car while he was looking for a job. The problem is not with him seeing the child, the court order says that he does get her 2 weeks every other month, the problem is if he has not provided an address or anything of where he will be, does she have to allow the child to go. The other problem is he is moving in with a man that he knows nothing about and taking a child there. Something about this all sounds fishy but just wanted some input

mom has a court order she must follow. if mom feels a need to change that court order, she need to file a modification with the courts and have a really good reason why it needs to be changed.

and having a new roommate, is not just cause. the roommate has to be proven a danger. do you really run a criminal check on any person you come within 10 feet of on a daily basis?

when dad moves in, get the man's name and run a check. or even better, get the address, run the address on megan's list.

 

[nana99]

Honestly your daughter is the one who should be asking these questions. I understand that you are concerned for your grandchild, believe me, I do. But you are a legal stranger.

Having said that, has 'dad' been adjudicated as dad? Are there support orders in place? If so, was visitation ordered? How old is the child?

I am asking for her because she is at work. I will however have her get her own account when she gets home from work.

Yes he has been abjudicated. There are support orders in place, however those orders were signed less than a month ago, so he has not paid yet. Visitation was ordered, he has the child 2 weeks every other month. And the child is 20 months old. Visitation is not a problem, it's not him seeing her, just him allowing her to spend the night at a house where he doeds not know the people living there.

 

[nana99]

mom has a court order she must follow. if mom feels a need to change that court order, she need to file a modification with the courts and have a really good reason why it needs to be changed.

and having a new roommate, is not just cause. the roommate has to be proven a danger. do you really run a criminal check on any person you come within 10 feet of on a daily basis?

when dad moves in, get the man's name and run a check. or even better, get the address, run the address on megan's list.

Thank you, that was all I was actually asking. It's not the court order that is an issue, it was just her going into a house and spending 2 weeks there, with people no one knows and with her father not seeing her for 4 months. She is going to get the address and man's name as soon as possible, He was actually supposed to send that to her 2 days ago. Thank you again

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

I am asking for her because she is at work. I will however have her get her own account when she gets home from work.

Yes he has been abjudicated. There are support orders in place, however those orders were signed less than a month ago, so he has not paid yet. Visitation was ordered, he has the child 2 weeks every other month. And the child is 20 months old. Visitation is not a problem, it's not him seeing her, just him allowing her to spend the night at a house where he doeds not know the people living there.

Sorry I missed that.

 

[nana99]

Sorry I missed that.

No problem at all I was trying to be able to give her a heads up when she gets home from work. She just found out he was moving here a couple of days ago, so needless to say she is worried about the childs safety. Not an issue with her not knowing the person, a child meets people every day that the other parent may not know, but strange for them to stay in a house where neither parent knows the person Thank you again for your input

 

[mommyof4]

No problem at all I was trying to be able to give her a heads up when she gets home from work. She just found out he was moving here a couple of days ago, so needless to say she is worried about the childs safety. Not an issue with her not knowing the person, a child meets people every day that the other parent may not know, but strange for them to stay in a house where neither parent knows the person Thank you again for your input

But Mom does not get to control Dad's parenting choices.

His living with a new roommate is a non-issue unless and until the new roommate is a proven danger to the child.

 

[Silverplum]

But Mom does not get to control Dad's parenting choices.

His living with a new roommate is a non-issue unless and until the new roommate is a proven danger to the child.

Entirely correct, which is why I'd like to co-sign.

And...we still need the Mom to ask her own questions like a Big Girl.

 

[nana99]

But Mom does not get to control Dad's parenting choices.

His living with a new roommate is a non-issue unless and until the new roommate is a proven danger to the child.

It is not the fact he is living with a new roommate, it is to do with the fact that he doesn't know anything about this person, and met him online. During court proceedings both parents were given a lecture about online activities. Obviously I am overreacting to a situation. I guess I am just a concerned grandparent about a child staying in a house in which no one knows the people that are living there. I feel the need to apologize for my question.

 

[nana99]

Entirely correct, which is why I'd like to co-sign.

And...we still need the Mom to ask her own questions like a Big Girl.

Thank you for your input and I will no longer ask questions. I will have her do so when she returns from work. She had asked me to find out anything I could for her while she was gone.

 

[mommyof4]

It is not the fact he is living with a new roommate, it is to do with the fact that he doesn't know anything about this person, and met him online. During court proceedings both parents were given a lecture about online activities. Obviously I am overreacting to a situation. I guess I am just a concerned grandparent about a child staying in a house in which no one knows the people that are living there. I feel the need to apologize for my question.

Overreacting? Probably not, coming from a protective mama/grandmama standpoint. But that's about ~feelings~ while the issue at hand is all about legalities.

BIG difference.

 

[nana99]

Overreacting? Probably not, coming from a protective mama/grandmama standpoint. But that's about ~feelings~ while the issue at hand is all about legalities.

BIG difference.

You are right there is a big difference about how you feel about a situation and the legalities of a situation

I would rather overreact and feel stupid for overreacting than to not give something a second thought and the end result be something bad.