Dropping Off for Visitation

[haiku]

Ehhh...my husband would gnaw off an ear before he would log into a website like this....Doesn't make him an evil dad, just one who is not into the internet as much as his wife is.....

In my opinion every one of these "pick up battles" is easily solved by having the parent pick up thier children. As has been stated, its amazing how much of a fire gets lit under your butt when you want your kids BACK.

 

[gr8rn]

We are just speaking about a couple of miles here, right.

So if this bugs dad so much why isn't he ranting and raving about it

I have a suspicion that dad could care less and step mom is in a hissy fit about it

The more stepmom has a hissy fit about things, the more mom knows she's got all the power. I'm just sayin...

YOU...are one smart cookie

 

[MichaCA]

I agree with a suggestion that has worked like a charm in our situation: the receiving parent picks up. However in our situation, a custody evaluator has it set up that all transitions happen at school which isn't always the best, and am not suggesting husband and ex wife attempt to change their visitation schedule. However, if the court order can be modified to the receiving parent picks the child up at the beginning of the visitation time, bickering will stop...and also include, after hashing out first, what works as far as when its OK to drop the child off at school...just make sure its in the order.

In the meantime, dad should follow the order to a T. Then file for a modification. Keep it simple.

Not to fuel any flames, I keep hearing about moms' drinking. Just me, IF I were dad, I would not make it the issue in court, but I would have my attorney help me out in bringing it up, if he has sincere concerns about mom drinking and driving with kid in the car. Not saying it will go anywhere, but I would feel remiss if I had that info and didn't bring it up.

Another tip of something that got included in our court order that helped us a lot, is we correspond by email. That way you have a paper trail of disputes around the court order...ex. mom refusing to cooperate around transportation.

 

[Antigone*]

YOU...are one smart cookie

Why thank you gr8rn

 

[LdiJ]

I feel that the responses on this thread have been a bit all over the place, so I am going to clarify what is the "norm" regarding transportation.

Normally the receiving parent provides the transportation. So, normally dad would pick up at the beginning of his visitation and mom would pick up at the end.

However...there is one very significant exception to that. If dad were exercising overnight parenting time on a school night (either Wednesday or Sunday) then dad would be expected to transport the child to school...not to mom's house for mom to transport the child to school.

So, if all of dad's parenting times end with school the next morning, then dad would end up doing all of the transporting, because he would be picking up at the beginning of visitation and transporting the child to school at the end.

 

[wileybunch]

So as was suggested, go to court to modify the transportation to reflect what is reasonable under these circumstances.

And, I have another DH who would rather "gnaw off an ear" then spend time on an internet forum.

 

[LdiJ]

So as was suggested, go to court to modify the transportation to reflect what is reasonable under these circumstances.

And, I have another DH who would rather "gnaw off an ear" then spend time on an internet forum.

I have an ex who also feels the same way.....

 

[doc2b]

However...there is one very significant exception to that. If dad were exercising overnight parenting time on a school night (either Wednesday or Sunday) then dad would be expected to transport the child to school...not to mom's house for mom to transport the child to school.

So, if all of dad's parenting times end with school the next morning, then dad would end up doing all of the transporting, because he would be picking up at the beginning of visitation and transporting the child to school at the end.

That's not always true. My husband's schedule included Wednesday through Sunday (overnights), but because of his work schedule, mom was to provide transportation from our house to school each day and then picked them up after school. He picked them up from her after work. This is not the norm, but it was court ordered...each case is different.

 

[LdiJ]

That's not always true. My husband's schedule included Wednesday through Sunday (overnights), but because of his work schedule, mom was to provide transportation from our house to school each day and then picked them up after school. He picked them up from her after work. This is not the norm, but it was court ordered...each case is different.

Of course there are cases that are different. However, the "norm" is still the norm.

This stepmom did say that their other children were being transported to the same school. Therefore obviously they don't have the same issues that exist in your husband's case.

 

[doc2b]

Of course there are cases that are different. However, the "norm" is still the norm.

This stepmom did say that their other children were being transported to the same school. Therefore obviously they don't have the same issues that exist in your husband's case.

Oh, I totally agree. Just saying that you never know what you might get if you leave it up to the court to decide.