Aunts/Uncles/Grandparents

[sam02135]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MA

I know the law of the land and Massachusetts is so biased toward the natural mothers. I will need to address a new law for visitations of aunts/uncles/grandparents. The SJC ruled that the natural parent has full rights of the children.
And since my brother who is the father of the children has passed away and through his letters to his children, it was obvious that my brother wanted his siblings to help raise them. But I as an uncle do not have any rights. Are there any organizations I can tap into to address this problem with my senator? And the mother of my niece and nephew had threatened the life of the children 6 years back. And I had sought legal and professional (pediatrician) help to see what I can do. We are going through litigation with the estate as my brother did not want her to have any of his estate except for 50% of his retirement account. Another thing is I and my family helped raise the children (which holds no clout) since the children were born. I have no comments this time regarding the natural mother as I have nothing good to say about her. This is such a sad case, but I and my family have no visitation rights. Since I helped raised my brother's children with the willingness of the natural mother to permit me to conduct daily activities, I am a de facto parent. What can I do other than standing at the SJC with a sign asking for help for a new law?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MA

I know the law of the land and Massachusetts is so biased toward the natural mothers. I will need to address a new law for visitations of aunts/uncles/grandparents. The SJC ruled that the natural parent has full rights of the children.
And since my brother who is the father of the children has passed away and through his letters to his children, it was obvious that my brother wanted his siblings to help raise them. But I as an uncle do not have any rights. Are there any organizations I can tap into to address this problem with my senator? And the mother of my niece and nephew had threatened the life of the children 6 years back. And I had sought legal and professional (pediatrician) help to see what I can do. We are going through litigation with the estate as my brother did not want her to have any of his estate except for 50% of his retirement account.

Please re-read your post..and then ask your legal question. Please.

 

[stealth2]

Aunts and Uncles and Grandparents - oh my!

I see Dorothy, skipping her way through the forest...

OP - the law favors the PARENTS of the child. Not either one's siblings, parents, etc. Perhaps if you tried a sweeter approach with Mom (not "natural mother", but Mom), you'd get further.

 

[Mass_Shyster]

not "natural mother", but Mom

The Massachusetts SJC refers to Mom as the "natural mother" in care and protection issues. See Guardianship of Knox 2009 WL 2059590 (Mass.App.Ct.,2009). Where grandparents were seeking custody.

 

[stealth2]

Fair enough. I'm sure that calling Mom that does a lot to give her the warm fuzzies for Uncle Sam and motivates her to allow him to spend time with her children. Honey vs. Vinegar.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MA

I know the law of the land and Massachusetts is so biased toward the natural mothers. I will need to address a new law for visitations of aunts/uncles/grandparents. The SJC ruled that the natural parent has full rights of the children.
And since my brother who is the father of the children has passed away and through his letters to his children, it was obvious that my brother wanted his siblings to help raise them. But I as an uncle do not have any rights. Are there any organizations I can tap into to address this problem with my senator? And the mother of my niece and nephew had threatened the life of the children 6 years back. And I had sought legal and professional (pediatrician) help to see what I can do. We are going through litigation with the estate as my brother did not want her to have any of his estate except for 50% of his retirement account. Another thing is I and my family helped raise the children (which holds no clout) since the children were born. I have no comments this time regarding the natural mother as I have nothing good to say about her. This is such a sad case, but I and my family have no visitation rights. Since I helped raised my brother's children with the willingness of the natural mother to permit me to conduct daily activities, I am a de facto parent. What can I do other than standing at the SJC with a sign asking for help for a new law?

Your brother may have wanted his siblings to help raise his children but the law quite properly gives that right to the children's remaining parent.

If my ex's siblings demonstrated the kind of attitude about me that you are demonstrating about mom, I wouldn't have let them anywhere near my children either.

Your brother's estate should belong to his children. I am sure that the fact that you are litigating his estate doesn't sit too well with mom either. It certainly wouldn't sit well with me.

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MA

I know the law of the land and Massachusetts is so biased toward the natural mothers. I will need to address a new law for visitations of aunts/uncles/grandparents. The SJC ruled that the natural parent has full rights of the children.
And since my brother who is the father of the children has passed away and through his letters to his children, it was obvious that my brother wanted his siblings to help raise them. But I as an uncle do not have any rights. Are there any organizations I can tap into to address this problem with my senator? And the mother of my niece and nephew had threatened the life of the children 6 years back. And I had sought legal and professional (pediatrician) help to see what I can do. We are going through litigation with the estate as my brother did not want her to have any of his estate except for 50% of his retirement account. Another thing is I and my family helped raise the children (which holds no clout) since the children were born. I have no comments this time regarding the natural mother as I have nothing good to say about her. This is such a sad case, but I and my family have no visitation rights. Since I helped raised my brother's children with the willingness of the natural mother to permit me to conduct daily activities, I am a de facto parent. What can I do other than standing at the SJC with a sign asking for help for a new law?

You are not a "de facto parent" . Look up the definition and you will glean the meaning of de facto parent.

 

[sam02135]

I did look up de facto parent and I fit the category. But which dictionary did I look that up on ? Well .. that I lived with them.. check, that I not necessarily had a relationship with the mother .... check, that I conduct and schedule daily routines for the children... check.

I don't know where else to look for the definition. Do help me find the correct "legal definition"....

 

[sam02135]

Aunts and Uncles and Grandparents - oh my!

I see Dorothy, skipping her way through the forest...

OP - the law favors the PARENTS of the child. Not either one's siblings, parents, etc. Perhaps if you tried a sweeter approach with Mom (not "natural mother", but Mom), you'd get further.

It's called payout.. pay to play. Just like the governor of Illinois. We've treated her as family but her thoughts of entitlement is what it is. All Dorothy had to do was click her heels 3 times and the siblings will disappear. Mind you a short 3 year marriage, pre-nups signed... etc... not much in the estate but she claimed in her lawsuit that everything should be part of the estate. Everyone's opinion is needed. I already know the outside looking in sees that I'm the bad guy. Similar to Anna Nicole Smith.. ".. he promised me ... "... Thank you just the same.

 

[sam02135]

Your brother may have wanted his siblings to help raise his children but the law quite properly gives that right to the children's remaining parent.

If my ex's siblings demonstrated the kind of attitude about me that you are demonstrating about mom, I wouldn't have let them anywhere near my children either.

Your brother's estate should belong to his children. I am sure that the fact that you are litigating his estate doesn't sit too well with mom either. It certainly wouldn't sit well with me.

I addressed your comments and I believe because I wrote so much that it automatically logged me out and lost all the the contents to my reply twice. I'm "tired" and frustrated of responding... maybe I'll re-write again but this time I will copy the content before "submit reply" just in case again.

In short.. you don't know the full story, but one thing clear is that we loved her like she was our own sibling and the children like our own. We bent over backwards for her, but she thought she is entitled to everything my brother owned. Pre-nups showed intentions, the Will stated what is. Nope... she claimed everything should be part of the estate... through her lawyer of course. Legal extortion.

 

[sam02135]

The Massachusetts SJC refers to Mom as the "natural mother" in care and protection issues. See Guardianship of Knox 2009 WL 2059590 (Mass.App.Ct.,2009). Where grandparents were seeking custody.

Thanks Steve, I'll look that up. I probably don't have to read the case, because I know the natural mother rules. I've heard about these cases and the natural mother rules. This is a sad story, the mother claims of entitlement and "he promised me..." blah blah blah. And the natural mother is holding the children "hostage" basically. It's about her... not for the best interest of the children.

Thank you for not judging me as some people already are.. but there's a whole lot of garbage flung my way and all I'm doing is defending the truth. Intentions of a Pre-nup, 3 year marriage...

 

[sam02135]

Please re-read your post..and then ask your legal question. Please.

Thanks... I "re-wrote".... I hope it's more clear. I was rambling. And I know my brother would want me to fight for them... at least to get visitations. And thanks for not judging me as some other have already and yet they don't know the whole story...

 

[stealth2]

Again... honey will get you further.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks Steve, I'll look that up. I probably don't have to read the case, because I know the natural mother rules. I've heard about these cases and the natural mother rules. This is a sad story, the mother claims of entitlement and "he promised me..." blah blah blah. And the natural mother is holding the children "hostage" basically. It's about her... not for the best interest of the children.

Thank you for not judging me as some people already are.. but there's a whole lot of garbage flung my way and all I'm doing is defending the truth. Intentions of a Pre-nup, 3 year marriage...

I wish that you understood how totally damaging it is to refer to the children's mother as their biological mother or natural mother.

I wish you understood how incredible foolish/ total you in court that is.

I wish you understood how badly you are messing up this whole situation. However you clearly don't.

 

[sam02135]

I used the term "biological mother" or "natural mother" in citation from the SJC. That is the term they used and I had looked up the cases with those words used in "legal terms". I chose those words to let people know that I have done my research and my lawyers used those terms to state the court's rulings. I've used "mom" many many many times. I've also used the words and the truth that "... the children's mother threatened the life of the children... if I made it difficult for her...". Mother, mom .. same thing right? You say how damaging to use the words "biological .. natural..". How damaging is it when the mom threatened to kill the children? Answer that please.

Me in court and foolish using those words:... it will not be me that will be using those words in court, it would be my lawyer.. and guess what, her lawyer will also quote the SJC the case laws that the "... natural this and biological that... has full rights to raise her children how ever she likes...".

Now for "how badly I'll be messing this whole situation ...":
What situation? How bad is it? I've provided the details of this relationship, I've provided what is and what isn't, I have no visitation rights, she has threatened the life of the children, she claimed everything should be part of the estate, which clearly isn't the facts and the law. And I can also prove the lies that she and her lawyer used in the case... which can be proven false...
Please tell me how badly I'll be messing this whole situation. For the best interest of the children, their father would like his siblings in influencing how they grow up, that's a fact and the mother/mom can also. Direct quote from my brother to my mother: "... mom ... I hope you live at least another 15 years... with you and my siblings around, the children will grow up to be good kids... just like your sons and daughters have ...". Where does the the children's mother fit into this, well, that shows what my brother thought of her "skills" were. So badly am I messing up this situation? I'm defending her lawsuit, and I'm trying to find out which direction to go with claiming visitations as an uncle. And my brother would want me to try. At least my brother's children will see a legal proceedings in me seeking visitations when his children comes looking for us and can't find us in this world we live in. The MOTHER can hide the truth from them for so long.

And I thank you for your and everyone's thoughts on this as I'm seeking answers and ideas. My side have extended ourselves, offers to settle and ignored... through Summary Judgment and Pre-trial, the courts noted the facts and what is, what isn't... and yet Plaintiff has no answers nor proof for the court during pre-trial. One suggestions is "honey vs vinegar"... I've tried honey.. more honey... but entitlement drives the Plaintiff.