Hi,
I think all of the replies that I have received here are good! I agree that we do need co-parenting and I am signing up for those classes that start in January today!
Good - even if he doesn't cooperate, it will be help you learn which hills to die on.
I called her father's phone and when the girlfriend answered I only wanted to know what she had eaten and when so I could go by that to know what time to feed her next and what to feed her next. I didn't think there would be an argument.
Well... if the doctor told you to only feed her formula & rice cereal... Why would you need to know WHAT to feed her next. Not a huge choice there, and really... it wouldn't make much of a difference if she got the same thing twice in a row... Ya know?
The reason I asked if this was your first child is... as mothers (perhaps fathers, too, but I'm not one of those so I can't say for certain), we tend to go overboard with our first. EVERYthing needs to be *just* *so*. We tend to doubt our natural instincts. Many (most?) of us have btdt. But know that... it's not that easy to to do something irreparable. Dads tend to be more fly by the seat by nature - and that serves it's purpose, too. It helps kids learn how to take chances, and that just because something may be scary - it doesn't mean it's unsafe or wrong.
Understand that you and Dad serve two different functions in raising your child(ren). Obviously, you'll have some parents switching those roles, and some parents straddling the two. But for the most part.... men and women parent very differently. Understanding that may help you loosen up a bit and allow him to parent his way.
But yeah - ignore the g/f.