Personal website non-custoidal kids to contact father

[chad101]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Michigan

Brief overview:

I have two kids from a previous marriage, 1 boy (12 years) and 1 girl (11 years). My kids were moved to the other side of the US about 8 years ago. I have a court order allowing the kids to stay with me during the summer. Yet, I’ve had no luck getting this order enforced...

During this time my only contact with the kids was via phone; which was closely monitored by my ex-wife. I’m put on speaker phone and I can overhear the mother coaching the kids how to answer some of my questions.

Fast forward 8 years and my children have since moved back to the state of Michigan (approximately 6 months ago). I was informed from my ex-brother in-law, that the reason my ex-wife moved back to Michigan was due to a pending Child Protective Services case in Arizona. Presumably due to an illegal drug habit she (my ex-wife) picked up.

I cannot get any information from my kids and I also learned today that another CPS case was started in Michigan. The Michigan CPS dept is not working with me. I have requested information pertaining to the case (in writing and over the phone). The only response I received was a voice mail from the active CPS case worker, informing me that she spoke to my ex-wife and told her about my inquiry!! So apparently CPS case workers (in Michigan) don’t care about the privacy of others. All I know is that an active case was opened in Michigan and the CPS worker notified the other party that I (the biological father) was inquiring for information pertaining to the case…

I’m sorry for rambling on, I’ve actually boiled this down to what I think is needed to explain my motive for creating this website.

I purchased a domain name:

[son’s first name] +"and"+ [daughter’s first name].com

My plan is to create a password protected contact form and blog, along with my current contact information in case my kids ever need to get a hold of me in an emergency or need to tell me something.

Question:
What data should I avoid posting or sharing with my two non custodial kids on this website? I don't want to break any laws. I know the mother will eventually find out about this website. So I want to avoid anything that may cause "too much" friction.

 

[Isis1]

First off, privacy with CPS? LMAO!!!! They are not required by any law to withhold any conversation with you from the other parent.

Now, about the contact site. Are they of age according to the sites rules and regulations? Check into that. And, keep in mind, it might be an issue if mom wants access. Encouraging the children to hide things from their parent is never a good way to go.

If the children are closer, are you considering filing to modify for more time with them?

 

[chad101]

Now, about the contact site. Are they of age according to the sites rules and regulations? Check into that. And, keep in mind, it might be an issue if mom wants access. Encouraging the children to hide things from their parent is never a good way to go.

Its perfectly fine if Mom wants access. The site needs to be password protected otherwise I would be sharing my personal information with the whole world. Privacy is my main concern. But I want to tell my kids first before notifying her.

If the children are closer, are you considering filing to modify for more time with them?

Yes, I have scheduled an appt w/ an attorney. I haven't found anyone that is well versed in Internet laws though...

 

[momofrose]

I have to ask - it has been EIGHT years since you have seen your children? You have a court order that says you get them everyt summer, yet, you are saying she has denied these parenting times every single year for EIGHT years and have done nothing about it??

 

[chad101]

I have to ask - it has been EIGHT years since you have seen your children? You have a court order that says you get them everyt summer, yet, you are saying she has denied these parenting times every single year for EIGHT years and have done nothing about it??

Are you asking me if I've done nothing about it or are you making a disguised judgmental statement?

Yes, I have done something about it... For many years!!!!!

Lets keep this thread within the bounds of my original question.

 

[Mom_of_Two]

Are you asking me if I've done nothing about it or are you making a disguised judgmental statement?

Yes, I have done something about it... For many years!!!!!

Lets keep this thread within the bounds of my original question.

Actually, that is a very valid question that the court may ask you. Did you ever file contempt with the court for mom denying you your summer visitations?

 

[Just Blue]

Are you asking me if I've done nothing about it or are you making a disguised judgmental statement?

Yes, I have done something about it... For many years!!!!!

Lets keep this thread within the bounds of my original question.

Your OQ will be best answered by letting the VOLUNTEERS know how/what has been done to enforce your CO.

 

[mistoffolees]

Are you asking me if I've done nothing about it or are you making a disguised judgmental statement?

Yes, I have done something about it... For many years!!!!!

Then how is it that you haven't seen the kids for 8 years?

The answer to that is important in answering your original question. If you have a valid court order giving you summers, there's no reason why you shouldn't have managed to get some visitation in 8 years - if you were making a reasonable effort.

 

[ecmst12]

I think you should concentrate on getting your visitation order enforced and making sure that CPS knows where you are if they need to remove the children from mom's house, rather then messing around with a stupid web site. Get a lawyer and get back into court!

 

[stealth2]

But it's so much easier to just get pissy with the volunteers.

 

[LdiJ]

But it's so much easier to just get pissy with the volunteers.

It never ceases to amaze me how often people do not understand "cause and effect" enough to understand that their questions cannot be answered in a vaccumn.

There are some times when a question is basic enough that it can be answered on its "face" but most of the time, with family law, the backstory is honestly needed to answer a question with any degree of accuracy.

However, we do tend to give people a hard time also if they give us too much information, so its kind of a catch 22.

 

[ecmst12]

Except that mom has the absolute right to control their computer use and supervise EVERYTHING they do on the computer. In fact, mom SHOULD be doing this. Children of that age should not have any alone time on a computer.

 

[majomom1]

As far as what to avoid - avoid putting anything in writing that you don't want a judge to see: no negative talk about Mom, prying questions about her drug use or other activities, or putting them in the middle of anything btwn you and their Mom.

You have to put this in writing? This is common sense.

If you think this board is "harsh".... wait until you get into court.

 

[CJane]

When they are 13, they will be able to set up Facebook accounts, which will be a much better way to communicate/share photos with them individually and privately.

Privately? Not in my house.

I have the passwords to everything. I monitor the texts on the cell phone, and have no problem grabbing it out of Wild's hand mid-type just to see what she's up to.

There is no privacy with electronics. A diary? Absolutely. But communications with other people? No. Freaking. Way.

 

[stealth2]

Privately? Not in my house.

I have the passwords to everything. I monitor the texts on the cell phone, and have no problem grabbing it out of Wild's hand mid-type just to see what she's up to.

There is no privacy with electronics. A diary? Absolutely. But communications with other people? No. Freaking. Way.

Ditto that. Both of mine knew that it was my prerogative to check their communications until they were 18. My 16yo still knows that if I have a concern? She can hand that phone over for me to look at. Same with email, FB accounts, etc. MINE. And ya know? It has NOTHING to do with communicating with their Dad. It's the rest of the world. But... if their Dad was trying to sneak past me? I'd have an issue with it. As I hope he would if the situations were reversed.