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Divorce complications

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Tensecta

Junior Member
Ohio

I have a few questions. I am giving my wife a divorce because she doesn't like my daughter and continues to talk about ending her own life because of her unhappiness.

We have a house bought during the marriage but it is in my name only as she wasnt working at the time. She wants to keep the house, we owe less on it than its worth. Is this possible?

I have adopted her child from a previous relationship. We also have a child together. Does anyone know about how much Ill have to pay for support making around 60K a year and she makes about 30K? Does it make a difference that one of them is her child? Or since I adopted him then it will be just like he is ours?

What is a fair amount for allimony? We have been married almost 6 years now

I need a new car should I get this before the divorce or after?
 
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Bali Hai

Senior Member
Ohio

I have a few questions. I am giving my wife a divorce because she doesn't like my daughter and continues to talk about ending her own life because of her unhappiness.

We have a house bought during the marriage but it is in my name only as she wasnt working at the time. She wants to keep the house, we owe less on it than its worth. Is this possible?

I have adopted her child from a previous relationship. We also have a child together. Does anyone know about how much Ill have to pay for support making around 60K a year and she makes about 30K? Does it make a difference that one of them is her child? Or since I adopted him then it will be just like he is ours?

What is a fair amount for allimony? We have been married almost 6 years now
I would say that a fair amount of alimony would be $0, although that may not be what happens. See an attorney.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Ohio

I have a few questions. I am giving my wife a divorce because she doesn't like my daughter and continues to talk about ending her own life because of her unhappiness.

We have a house bought during the marriage but it is in my name only as she wasnt working at the time. She wants to keep the house, we owe less on it than its worth. Is this possible?
She could keep the house if she can afford to buy you out of half the equity and refinance it into her name. DO NOT quit claim deed the house to her unless she has refinanced.

Is it your wife or daughter who is suicidal?

I have adopted her child from a previous relationship. We also have a child together. Does anyone know about how much Ill have to pay for support making around 60K a year and she makes about 30K? Does it make a difference that one of them is her child? Or since I adopted him then it will be just like he is ours?
You have TWO children. Adopting the child means that he is legally YOUR child. How much you pay in child support depends on a variety of things from how much day care costs, whether the children have any extraordinary medical expenses, whether you have other children that are not shared between the two of you (you mention a daughter -- is that your second child with your wife or is that child from another relationship), how much time you have with the children, and various other factors.


What is a fair amount for allimony? We have been married almost 6 years now
Why do you believe you will pay any alimony? Alimony is NOT an entitlement. However it could be possible that you would be ordered to pay 15k a year for two years in order to equalize incomes. However how much debt exists? Who will be responsible for the debt? What assets exist? Too many variables come into play.
 
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Tensecta

Junior Member
She could keep the house if she can afford to buy you out of half the equity and refinance it into her name. DO NOT quit claim deed the house to her unless she has refinanced.

Is it your wife or daughter who is suicidal?

It is my wife. She has talked like this before when divorce was brought up. She has said she wanted a divorce before but she wants me to file because she cant do it.


You have TWO children. Adopting the child means that he is legally YOUR child. How much you pay in child support depends on a variety of things from how much day care costs, whether the children have any extraordinary medical expenses, whether you have other children that are not shared between the two of you (you mention a daughter -- is that your second child with your wife or is that child from another relationship), how much time you have with the children, and various other factors.

I have a older daughter from a previous relationship also. total of 3 children. One hers (I adopted) I ours together and 1 mine.




Why do you believe you will pay any alimony? Alimony is NOT an entitlement. However it could be possible that you would be ordered to pay 15k a year for two years in order to equalize incomes. However how much debt exists? Who will be responsible for the debt? What assets exist? Too many variables come into play.
I thought I would have to pay alimony because thats what my wife says. I dont know much about anything I'm waiting for a lawyer to return my call. There is really not much debt other than her vehicle. Mine is paid off. No credit cards.

Another question I will need to get a new car mine has 200K on it. Should I get this vehicle before the divorce or after?
 

Bali Hai

Senior Member
I thought I would have to pay alimony because thats what my wife says. I dont know much about anything I'm waiting for a lawyer to return my call. There is really not much debt other than her vehicle. Mine is paid off. No credit cards.

Another question I will need to get a new car mine has 200K on it. Should I get this vehicle before the divorce or after?
Most if not all wives would say that. Never take advice from a legal opponet.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
I thought I would have to pay alimony because thats what my wife says.
Even if you learn nothing else from this site, pay attention to this:
Do NOT take legal advice from your ex, your ex's attorney, your ex's family, or ANYONE who is on your ex's side.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
You should hold off on any major purchases until after the divorce.
While I do not disagree with that at all, if he is going to finance a car it might possibly be easier to do so prior to the divorce. However, he also might buy more car than he can realistically handle payment wise if he buys it before the divorce.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
You should hold off on any major purchases until after the divorce.
Ideally, that's true. It may not matter though - if he finances the car, he'll keep the car and the loan - and there won't be any equity, so it won't affect property division.

The only real issue is if he uses marital funds to make a downpayment. He would probably have to reimburse ex for 1/2 of the marital money he used. Of course, if he spends his own income after filing for divorce, that's a non-issue.

The bigger problem is that there will be default orders that go into effect immediately on filing for divorce. The default orders may say that neither party can make a major purchase - in which case, he can't do it.

In general, it's better to hold off if at all possible (the fact that the car has 200,000 miles doesn't mean that it's not reasonable transportation). But if there's absolutely no way around getting another vehicle (if the engine blows up on the existing car, for example), it probably won't be the end of the world.
 

Tensecta

Junior Member
In general, it's better to hold off if at all possible (the fact that the car has 200,000 miles doesn't mean that it's not reasonable transportation). But if there's absolutely no way around getting another vehicle (if the engine blows up on the existing car, for example), it probably won't be the end of the world.
I drive the car for work and put 60K miles a year on it. As of right now its ok but its starting to leak and it wont last alot longer.

My gross income, will that include my car allowance or will that be subtracted?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I drive the car for work and put 60K miles a year on it. As of right now its ok but its starting to leak and it wont last alot longer.

My gross income, will that include my car allowance or will that be subtracted?
You should definitely fight to NOT have your car allowance included. That is money to reimburse you for the excess wear and tear on your car.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
I have adopted her child from a previous relationship. We also have a child together. Does anyone know about how much Ill have to pay for support making around 60K a year and she makes about 30K? Does it make a difference that one of them is her child? Or since I adopted him then it will be just like he is ours?
It is not "like he is ours", he IS "ours" (actually yours and hers). As to custody, parenting time and decision making, there is ZERO difference in your rights from one to the other child.

Do you both work full time? Are you equal caregivers? More caregiving time (I know a number of men who do more of the caregiving, the presumption mom does more is not necessarilly warranted). If so, you have the same right to request primary custody as she.
 
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