Damaged

[ClaraD]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL
I believe my case is a bit more serious than a typical divorce. Here is my situation. After 2 yrs of dating my husband led me to believe that he was ready for marriage and now after 2 years he is seeking a divorce. Prior to marriage I was completely independent. Had a job, own car, money and my kids were well provided for and happy. Quit my job and moved to another city after we married. He has 100% benefited from our marriage. From having his bills paid, nice home, new car and student loans paid off. This situation has affected my children & I greatly. I have dealt with bouts of depression, physical & emotional abuse, a miscarriage and an std. We have all been receiving therapy to help deal with the stress. I am currently in school full-time and seeking employment. My "husband" is seeking a divorce so that he can be involved with an ex he bumped into at his 10 yr high school reunion last yr. She sent me a text msg while I was pregnant with our last daughter letting me know that my husband was "her man" and that he never wanted to be with me and that he did not want our child. My husband put me and our children out of the home shortly there after. We at this time depend totally on what he allots us which isnt much. He provides well for himself and his mistress & his family but tells me that he cannot afford to give me and our 3 children anything more than what he gives. This is not the first time he has abandoned my children and I. He has a routine where he will pretend that he wants to work things out and then when something else catches his attention we get the boot. Divorce I know is one option but I believe my children and I have suffered damages. Question is can I sue for emotional distress/fraud?

 

[ecmst12]

He is not permitted to "put you out" of the marital home without a court order. You can feel free to move back in - call the police if you need to be let back into your home.

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL
I believe my case is a bit more serious than a typical divorce. Here is my situation. After 2 yrs of dating my husband led me to believe that he was ready for marriage and now after 2 years he is seeking a divorce. Prior to marriage I was completely independent. Had a job, own car, money and my kids were well provided for and happy. Quit my job and moved to another city after we married. He has 100% benefited from our marriage. From having his bills paid, nice home, new car and student loans paid off. This situation has affected my children & I greatly. I have dealt with bouts of depression, physical & emotional abuse, a miscarriage and an std. We have all been receiving therapy to help deal with the stress. I am currently in school full-time and seeking employment. My "husband" is seeking a divorce so that he can be involved with an ex he bumped into at his 10 yr high school reunion last yr. She sent me a text msg while I was pregnant with our last daughter letting me know that my husband was "her man" and that he never wanted to be with me and that he did not want our child. My husband put me and our children out of the home shortly there after. We at this time depend totally on what he allots us which isnt much. He provides well for himself and his mistress & his family but tells me that he cannot afford to give me and our 3 children anything more than what he gives. This is not the first time he has abandoned my children and I. He has a routine where he will pretend that he wants to work things out and then when something else catches his attention we get the boot. Divorce I know is one option but I believe my children and I have suffered damages. Question is can I sue for emotional distress/fraud?

Your situation is not unique and you're not going to be able to sue for emotional distress or fraud. And he's not your "husband", he's your husband. No quotes needed.

File for divorce and move on.

He is not permitted to "put you out" of the marital home without a court order. You can feel free to move back in - call the police if you need to be let back into your home.

Absolutely true. If, however, OP can prove it, it could severely limit Dad's chances for primary custody.

 

[ClaraD]

Your situation is not unique and you're not going to be able to sue for emotional distress or fraud. And he's not your "husband", he's your husband. No quotes needed.

File for divorce and move on.



Absolutely true. If, however, OP can prove it, it could severely limit Dad's chances for primary custody.

Mistoffolees,

I never said or implied that it was unique. I simply wanted to know if there was a another option other than a simple divorce. I have researched and found where a spouse has and successfully sued for emotional distress/fraud in situations of this nature, but thanks for your opinion. I know what he is or is not to me. No sarcasm needed.

 

[tuffbrk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL
IPrior to marriage I was completely independent. Had a job, own car, money and my kids were well provided for and happy. Quit my job and moved to another city after we married. He has 100% benefited from our marriage. From having his bills paid, nice home, new car and student loans paid off.

If you are not yet divorced, request pendente lite support while going through the divorce process. Let the courts know that hubby tossed you out as well.

You chose to quit your job - your decision. He 100% benefited from the marriage from having his bills paid (from his salary presumably and your bills were paid too?), nice home (which you also lived in), new car (you still had yours, presumably he was making the payments on the new car) and student loans paid off (again - from his own paycheck?). I'm not seeing any damages to sue for.

Good luck.

 

[mistoffolees]

Mistoffolees,

I never said or implied that it was unique. I simply wanted to know if there was a another option other than a simple divorce. I have researched and found where a spouse has and successfully sued for emotional distress/fraud in situations of this nature, but thanks for your opinion. I know what he is or is not to me. No sarcasm needed.

You didn't use the word 'unique', but you said "I believe my case is a bit more serious than a typical divorce." Well, it's not.

Feel free to try to sue for emotional distress. When you lose, your stbx can ask for an order for you to pay his legal expenses. Sorry, but your claim isn't going anywhere. There are women who are beaten to within an inch of their lives who can't use the 'emotional distress/fraud' claim. It's just an extremely rare claim to be enforced against spouses.

 

[Zigner]

He spent two years with you prior to marriage and two years married. Then he found (re-found) a new flame. That is not "fraud" nor is it "emotional distress" (in the legal sense.) It's simply a person changing.

This is not a statement on morality at all. I'm simply pointing out that yours is not a case of fraud or emotional distress.

 

[Silverplum]

Please read dozens and dozens and dozens of threads here.

It's educational.

 

[Silverplum]

I knew I was forgetting something...

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL
I believe my case is a bit more serious than a typical divorce. Here is my situation. After 2 yrs of dating my husband led me to believe that he was ready for marriage and now after 2 years he is seeking a divorce. Prior to marriage I was completely independent. Had a job, own car, money and my kids were well provided for and happy.

So you have children from before the marriage. They are not his children -- or so its seems from the way you have presented this.

What's up with the father/s of your children?

Quit my job and moved to another city after we married. He has 100% benefited from our marriage. From having his bills paid, nice home, new car and student loans paid off.

That's marriage.

This situation has affected my children & I greatly. I have dealt with bouts of depression, physical & emotional abuse, a miscarriage and an std. We have all been receiving therapy to help deal with the stress.

Why are your children so affected?

Did you call the police when you were abused? What came of that situation?

I am currently in school full-time and seeking employment. My "husband" is seeking a divorce so that he can be involved with an ex he bumped into at his 10 yr high school reunion last yr.

Once you wrap up the semester, you'd probably better get a full-time job, or a couple of part-time jobs. (That's just life advice, not necessarily "legal" advice.) And you obviously REALLY NEED a job of some sort NOW.

She sent me a text msg while I was pregnant with our last daughter letting me know that my husband was "her man" and that he never wanted to be with me and that he did not want our child.

Rude, but not illegal.

My husband put me and our children out of the home shortly there after.

That's illegal, as you've been told.

We at this time depend totally on what he allots us which isnt much.

That's where the SHOUTING about the getting a JOB stuff comes in. As suggested, file for temp support, but don't count on much and don't count on it to come next week.
Perhaps see what resources are availiable in your area for a person in your situation.

He provides well for himself and his mistress & his family but tells me that he cannot afford to give me and our 3 children anything more than what he gives.

Is he the legal father of those children?
If so, file for child support.
If not, file for child support from the other father/s.

This is not the first time he has abandoned my children and I. He has a routine where he will pretend that he wants to work things out and then when something else catches his attention we get the boot. Divorce I know is one option but I believe my children and I have suffered damages.

Whose children?

Question is can I sue for emotional distress/fraud?

You could try. Anyone can sue for any reason. The question is, will you win?

The answer to that is, nope.

 

[Zigner]

I gotta disagree with folks slightly...

It is perfectly legal for the husband to tell his wife to leave their marital home. It is also perfectly legal for the wife to refuse to do so. (or vice-versa, of course)

 

[ClaraD]

If you are not yet divorced, request pendente lite support while going through the divorce process. Let the courts know that hubby tossed you out as well.

You chose to quit your job - your decision. He 100% benefited from the marriage from having his bills paid (from his salary presumably and your bills were paid too?), nice home (which you also lived in), new car (you still had yours, presumably he was making the payments on the new car) and student loans paid off (again - from his own paycheck?). I'm not seeing any damages to sue for.

Good luck.

I made the decision based off a complete and total lie. He admitted to not wanting to be married and that he only married me for the money and increase pay. We lived off MY money when we first married because he wasn't making as much as I was. We lived off my savings for the 1st year of our marriage. I paid the bills, daycare and he had no car he drove mine and I paid the note on it every month. When MY money ran out we ended up having to take out a loan because you guessed it I found out he wasn't paying the bills. His student loans were paid off through our income tax refund because he "forgot" to tell me that he had defaulted on his loans. The damages you dont see is or dont want to see or whatever is the fact that not only did this man trick me into entering into this marriage but my children have been emotionally effected by this in ways too personal to list. But I understand you all are the experts and are answering according to the law. So if the law says Im screwed than thats the law. Thanx

 

[ClaraD]

I knew I was forgetting something...


So you have children from before the marriage. They are not his children -- or so its seems from the way you have presented this.

What's up with the father/s of your children?


That's marriage.


Why are your children so affected?

Did you call the police when you were abused? What came of that situation?


Once you wrap up the semester, you'd probably better get a full-time job, or a couple of part-time jobs. (That's just life advice, not necessarily "legal" advice.) And you obviously REALLY NEED a job of some sort NOW.


Rude, but not illegal.


That's illegal, as you've been told.


That's where the SHOUTING about the getting a JOB stuff comes in. As suggested, file for temp support, but don't count on much and don't count on it to come next week.
Perhaps see what resources are availiable in your area for a person in your situation.


Is he the legal father of those children?
If so, file for child support.
If not, file for child support from the other father/s.


Whose children?


You could try. Anyone can sue for any reason. The question is, will you win?

The answer to that is, nope.

He is the legal father to 2 of my children. He abandoned our oldest for 2 yrs because and I quote he "wasn't ready for another kid." So for 2 yrs no contact/no support. Our youngest is a couple months old and he makes no effort to see that child either and I quote, "Im living my life." My 3rd child was abandoned by her father. CS payments I get every blue moon is the only way I know he's still alive. My husband has been in her life since she was a baby and she doesnt know that he's not her father. The situation has been the hardest on her because he doesn't treat her like he used to. He treats her differently and she doesn't understand why. She has started to become reclusive and lashes out. I have to keep her at home because of it. I have been looking for employment for the past 2 1/2 yrs and have been unable to find work. Lets be real this is no longer the economy you can say go out and find a job in, but I have been trying but in the mean time I take what I can get and I go to school as well.

I say my children because I've been the one taking care of them. CS checks are nice but thats not what real parenting is about and just because you donate sperm does not make you a father. Especially when you abandoned your children for stupid and immature reasons, but I guess you will tell me the court doesnt care. Well I do. I care about my children.

I appreciate you guys responses anyway. Thanx.

 

[Proserpina]

You really need to get it into your 3rd child's head that your husband isn't her father.

You are really, really going to damage her if you keep lying to her.

 

[ClaraD]

You really need to get it into your 3rd child's head that your husband isn't her father.

You are really, really going to damage her if you keep lying to her.

I take it you don't have any children and if you do.....wow.

She is too young for me to do that. I'll tell her when she's old enough to understand what that even means......

 

[Proserpina]

I take it you don't have any children and if you do.....wow.

She is too young for me to do that. I'll tell her when she's old enough to understand what that even means......

Then you can explain why the two people she trusts most in the world have lied to her for her entire life.

Hon, there IS an age-appropriate way you could have handled this.