Very Abusive Husband / Short Term Disability problems

[5earching]

I was recently married.

My husband began being abusive shortly after the marriage. Lots of verbal and emotional abuse. Initial physical violence left no marks, then he sent me to the hospital after nearly choking me to death. I was put on suicide watch in a live in mental care facility and not allowed to return to work. During this time he grew angry and blamed everything on me. He began destroying my property while I was not home (things I owned long before the marriage). He began threatening to kill my pets. We have separated, but he will not allow my to collect my property.

A few months have passed since this. I am required to do outpatient therapy for PTSD and alcohol (sober over a month now). The doctors are requiring therapy, but not allowing me to return to work. I do not have the finances to do this. I have tried to get Short Term Disability but it was denied because they are saying depression and my PCP wrote my an antidepressant a few months before this started.

I am currently staying with a family member, while constantly being harassed and all while I cannot afford anything. I want out but don't know what my legal options are.

What are my legal avenues?
Does the law protect me?

 

[Silverplum]

I was recently married.

My husband began being abusive shortly after the marriage. Lots of verbal and emotional abuse. Initial physical violence left no marks, then he sent me to the hospital after nearly choking me to death. I was put on suicide watch in a live in mental care facility and not allowed to return to work. During this time he grew angry and blamed everything on me. He began destroying my property while I was not home (things I owned long before the marriage). He began threatening to kill my pets. We have separated, but he will not allow my to collect my property.

A few months have passed since this. I am required to do outpatient therapy for PTSD and alcohol (sober over a month now). The doctors are requiring therapy, but not allowing me to return to work. I do not have the finances to do this. I have tried to get Short Term Disability but it was denied because they are saying depression and my PCP wrote my an antidepressant a few months before this started.

I am currently staying with a family member, while constantly being harassed and all while I cannot afford anything. I want out but don't know what my legal options are.

What are my legal avenues?
Does the law protect me?

What is the name of your US state?

 

[5earching]

What is the name of your US state?

Florida is the state.
Jacksonville is the city.
Duval is the county.

 

[Silverplum]

Thank you.

Here are some resources in your state: http://www.stateofflorida.com/Portal/DesktopDefault.aspx?tabid=64

https://duvalclerk.com/ccWebsite/FamilyLaw.department

https://duvalclerk.com/ccWebsite/DomesticViolence.department

http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/states/fldv.shtml

I wish you the best.

Also: another link for short-term disability and financial help: http://www.needhelppayingbills.com/html/duval_county_assistance_progra.html

 

[Zigner]

Have you contacted the police to assist you in retrieving your belongings?

 

[5earching]

I have not contacted the police.

I have been collecting my smaller items that I am able to remove while he is at work away from the home.
He keeps threatening to change the locks to keep me from gathering my things.

 

[Zigner]

I have not contacted the police.

I have been collecting my smaller items that I am able to remove while he is at work away from the home.
He keeps threatening to change the locks to keep me from gathering my things.

It is his right to do so - just as it is your right to do the same thing.

 

[5earching]

Thank you for the links Silverplum.

I have never had to deal with a situation like this before.
The way he controls everything is still just hard for me to get my head around.

I am having to tell myself that this is not right and I have to stand up for myself.

 

[commentator]

You have removed yourself from physical abuse. The only way he can now physically, emotionally or verbally abuse you is if you continue to have contact with him. Avoid this. "He's just being so mean and controlling" isn't a valid complaint. Sure he is, what did you expect? Are you really surprised he's acting like he always has?

Get your things as much as you can, and be done with it, get a protective order, and get away from him completely. How is your family member being harassed? Is he coming around? With your permission? It sounds as though you and he are bouncing off each other and fighting back and forth. This is not good for your new sobriety and your depression issues. Work with your counselors. You can't change his behavior, you've put up with it and you've tried for a while. now work on moving on and getting a new life.

 

[Bali Hai]

You have removed yourself from physical abuse. The only way he can now physically, emotionally or verbally abuse you is if you continue to have contact with him. Avoid this. "He's just being so mean and controlling" isn't a valid complaint. Sure he is, what did you expect? Are you really surprised he's acting like he always has?

Get your things as much as you can, and be done with it, get a protective order, and get away from him completely. How is your family member being harassed? Is he coming around? With your permission? It sounds as though you and he are bouncing off each other and fighting back and forth. This is not good for your new sobriety and your depression issues. Work with your counselors. You can't change his behavior, you've put up with it and you've tried for a while. now work on moving on and getting a new life.

This SOB deserves a hefty alimony payment, not that he wouldn't get if he wasn't an SOB.

 

[Proserpina]

This SOB deserves to pay his wife a hefty alimony payment

Fixed that for you.

 

[5earching]

To answer your questions commentator.

He has verbally harassed and threatened my family member that I am staying with.
I have not filed a protection order yet.

 

[Zigner]

Fixed that for you.

I get where you're coming from, but, while not normally worded that way, Bali's post was grammatically correct. The abusive husband should have an alimony payment, the wife should receive an alimony payment.

 

[Proserpina]

I get where you're coming from, but, while not normally worded that way, Bali's post was grammatically correct. The abusive husband should have an alimony payment, the wife should receive an alimony payment.

Sigh. I know. I was clarifying, because...well... let's face it, Bali rarely, RARELY comes out with a pro-alimony post.

Sorry.

 

[Silverplum]

Sigh. I know. I was clarifying, because...well... let's face it, Bali rarely, RARELY comes out with a pro-alimony post.

Sorry.

(Yes, Pro, but *I* got my "A" animals straight this time! )


You're welcome, 5earching. I send you my best wishes for your future.